Found out something new today...

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Found out something new today...

Postby Madeline » Mon Oct 18, 2004 7:32 pm

I feel like I know where my calling is. I was helping a friend volunteer in a Sunday school class (it's a Monday service) and I was realizing how much I didn't have a very good example of Christianity from older children that I looked up too. I know that I'm being hard on them...these were fourth and sixth graders; but many times I was deeply hurt by the way they treated me. I didn't have alot of money or brand-name clothes, I looked kind of funny and I had an issue with being judgemental and bossy, but underneath all of that I really needed love and attention.
I was always kind of left out...I remember one time in first grade-I was bumped up to second grade because I had a higher reading level than the rest of the kids...(I just like reading, I don't mean to be egotistical or say I'm smarter than they were or something) and I came back to the classroom. The class felt a little animosity towards me because of this and when I came back to the first grade for math, this boy named Cole scowled at me and said,
"You're in the other class. You don't belong."
I'll never forget that. Maybe I misconstrued it...but it doesn't matter. I've felt this way my whole life...like I don't belong.
And when I was with those kids, I remembered that and I felt this sense of duty towards them to show them all of the love I can...and let them know that they're family, that they belong somewhere. Somewhere where it doesn't matter what their peers or the older kids think.

When I see those commercials asking for donations to feed hungry children, it's really hard to hold back the tears and many times I start crying.
Even though alot of people are skeptical about this kind of stuff...I find it strange that for this one thing I don't feel any doubt at all. I'm a skeptical person. I always come up with a way that someone might be ripping me off or lying to me or plotting against me...
I feel an intense yearning to be with these people, so much so that I feel like I need to go where ever they are right NOW and make sure they're helped. And I think today with this children's ministry thing I just found the missing piece to everything I've been wondering about and doubting...everything God has told me hasn't made any since until now.
I realize that God shaped my funky personality that I always thought was seriously warped and strange just for what I was cut out to do.
And God is showing me more and more about faith and how it works...how much I cheat myself and other people because I'm afraid of risk, afraid of criticism, afraid of mistakes.
Satan has reined me in by my fear for so long...and now I'm realizing how perfect God is. Everything has a reason and a purpose...
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Postby Spirit_Wolf8356 » Mon Oct 18, 2004 8:20 pm

*hugs* That's great, Maddie! I'm very happy for you and I'll definitely be praying for you. ^_^


The choice has been made. There's no looking back. I won't let up, back up, give up, or shut up. My focus clear. My path is straight. My God, reliable. I'm a disciple of Christ.

Gods plan is like the sun. its too big and bright to look at directly, and sometimes the rain clouds cover it, but sometimes the plan dapples through the clouds and we can see beautiful glimpses of what he has in store for us.
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Postby true_noir_chloe » Mon Oct 18, 2004 8:22 pm

Maddie, I can honestly say I love the way you are. :hug:

From what I read it seems to me you are growing up in the Lord in a very healthy way. Having a heart for other human beings is a good sign that God can definitely use you. ^____^ And, He will and can use you even now at age 13.

I've really pushed mentoring programs in the homeschool environment, because what you shared is sadly very common. It is great for a kid to know that someone older than them, like a big brother or sister, aunt or uncle-type, think they are a special and wonderful person who is not only worth the precious life of God's own Son; but, also that another human being thinks they're worthy and worth being around.

I also think all kids need to know they are being heard. So many times we don't stop and listen to the cries of children; and those cries are expressed in sadness, depression, anger and shyness. Even the most outgoing kids could be hurting like crazy inside, and no one stops to listen to their heart, their words and their feelings.

We are all worth so very much, and I'm glad you feel called to help out younger kids, Maddie. Having a heart like our Savior is very rare, and it is something that we grow into all our lives as Christians. You're so young and you already recognize this and for that I am just so encouraged by you. ^________________^

[size=84][color=seagreen]YOU SEE


You see into the deepest part of me ---

beyond the fog I hide behind.

You cast your light upon the shadows

that stretch like cobwebs in my mind.

You ease the pain when I am hurting,

and morbid visions from my past

pierce into the realm of Reason

as though I danced on blades of glass.

You grant me strength when I have fallen

and, once again, I've lost my way.

You take my hand in Yours and lead me

into the promise of a brand new day.

You bring order to all my chaos,

yet set my well-laid plans awry.

You place me on a firm foundation ---

then give me wings so I can fly.

You sand away my roughened edges

and polish all the dullest parts

until I stand before Your presence...

a newly-sculpted work of art.

You see into the heart within me,

right through my motives and selfish will.

And yet, in spite of all You see

You say You love me even still.


~by D.M.~

[/color][/size]
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Postby Destroyer2000 » Mon Oct 18, 2004 8:23 pm

Yes, it does. I'm sorry for the way they treated you, as well. My family doesn't have alot of money, so I don't get the "brand-name" clothes, but I don't mind. I'm happy. I get called alot of names and stuff, but I mostly shrugg it off. The only times I fight back is when it involves someone close to me. I'll pray for you.
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Postby Mr. SmartyPants » Mon Oct 18, 2004 8:27 pm

aww, i know what you're talking about maddy. I'll pray for the best ^_^
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Postby agasfas » Mon Oct 18, 2004 9:05 pm

I feel an intense yearning to be with these people, so much so that I feel like I need to go where ever they are right NOW and make sure they're helped.


Sound good. I hope everything works out for you. Everything and everyone has a purpose. Never loose that thrive you have, that's what makes you unique.
"A merry heart doeth good like a medicine.." Prov 17:22

The word 'impossible' isn't in my dictionary... but I don't really have a dictionary you know? - Eikichi Onizuka.
Sorry, but I stop being a teacher at 5 o'clock. - Eikichi Onizuka.
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Postby Warrior 4 Jesus » Tue Oct 19, 2004 2:14 am

(Quote)...so I don't get the "brand-name" clothes, but I don't mind.

No need to worry I don't wear popular clothes either but thats me.
It's not the clothes that make the person, its the person that makes the clothes (double meaning LOL).

Back on topic: Congrats Madeline its great that you've discovered God's plan for you. Stick with Him and you will be ready for anything!

God Bless!
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Postby termyt » Tue Oct 19, 2004 4:39 am

You are a work in progress Madeline, but you are making progress. I've felt much the same way through out my life. Like an outsider, alone in a crowd, yet still, I believe God had a hand, a purpose in that. I'm glad you can see God's hand in your life, too. You know you are never alone, not with God leading and not while you are here at the CAA.

God Bless.
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Postby Spiritsword » Tue Oct 19, 2004 2:52 pm

Good for you, Madeline! ^_^ Sounds like God is leading you in a wonderful and fulfilling direction.

One thing I at times regret about working in the public schools is that I really don't get to bring my faith into the picture as openly as I'd like. I hope you find a place where you are able to shine forth the Lord's glory openly!

If you ever have any questions about careers working with kids or the schooling necessary to pursue them, feel free to PM me! ^_^
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Postby Madeline » Tue Oct 19, 2004 4:32 pm

*hugs* That's great, Maddie! I'm very happy for you and I'll definitely be praying for you. ^_^

Thanks. :D *hugs back*

Maddie, I can honestly say I love the way you are.

From what I read it seems to me you are growing up in the Lord in a very healthy way. Having a heart for other human beings is a good sign that God can definitely use you. ^____^ And, He will and can use you even now at age 13.

...We are all worth so very much, and I'm glad you feel called to help out younger kids, Maddie. Having a heart like our Savior is very rare, and it is something that we grow into all our lives as Christians. You're so young and you already recognize this and for that I am just so encouraged by you. ^________________^


Thank you so much. ^_^ You are so sweet. *hugs*
:hug:


If you ever have any questions about careers working with kids or the schooling necessary to pursue them, feel free to PM me! ^_^

I will. :) Thank you everybody for being so supportive of me. CAA has been such a huge blessing to me, and it wouldn't have been without loving Christian people like you. I appreciate it. This has been a major outlet for me in fellowship...CAA has played a huge part in both giving me a desire to be with Christian people and in my walk with Christ. I'm so blessed to have the opportunity to be around so many loving and wise people.
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Postby c-girl » Tue Oct 19, 2004 5:16 pm

I'm glad that you have a strong relationship with God. >^^<
I live to love and love to live! >^.^<
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Postby Danyasaur » Tue Oct 19, 2004 5:27 pm

that's awesome! ^_^ it's so great to know that God has a purpose for you, I remember how happy I was when I found out mine ^_^

anyways, as they say down here "keep on keepin' on" X3
[color="DimGray"]I don't believe that I would die if I saw you face to face;
but that my spirit would become so alive it took my body's place.

- Danya[/color]
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Postby EireWolf » Tue Oct 19, 2004 9:59 pm

Madeline, that is so awesome. You're very blessed to find a piece of your purpose so early on. :hug:
"All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us."
[indent]~~Gandalf, in Fellowship of the Ring[/indent]
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