Happiness...

[mizuhara_fan]

Do you guys feel that happiness is relative to each individual?

It's frustrating sometimes to think about this because I hear all my peers telling me how I should live my life, according to what they believe would make me happy. They say, "Get a girlfriend already or you'll end up miserable after college" or "How come you're still driving that piece of junk..." and even "You're still living with your parents!? Go out and get a dorm and start getting a life..."

A lot of what they're telling me seems like they figured it out. They think they know that I am unhappy because they see my life as not living up to their own expectations. But they don't realize that I am already happy. Just because my path differs from their life doesn't mean that they should worry about it. Yeah, I commute to college in a twenty year old car and I still don't have a girlfriend yet, but does that really make me "unhappy" given all of that? Of course not.

Sorry if it sounds like I am venting, but it's something I've been thinking about for a while and I just want to hear what you guys feel about the subject of "relative happiness."

[Liger'smane]

I think your view is correct. Take my older brother for example, he is turning 20 this year and he has never had a girlfriend, he lived at home until just a year ago when he went into the navy, and he drove a motorcycle.

I personally find wonderful happiness in drawing and knitting. Some of my 'friends' riticule me because I'm always knitting and drawing. My point is that your life is yours, only you and God know exactly what gives you pleasure. Your 'friends' should be there for you and not 'ruling' you. So, enjoy what you enjoy and serve the Lord, that always picks me up... ( I believe God made it to pick everyone up... though that's just my opinion) Have a *chuckle* 'fun' day.

[Locke]

Happiness is...

...driving a moped
...lying down on the grass and looking at clouds
...moshing by your self

...not caring that your view on life is different than 95% of the world.

EDIT: Oh, I thought this was a thread were you post what happiness is ^_^;;

[agasfas]

Yeah, I commute to college in a twenty year old car and I still don't have a girlfriend yet, but does that really make me "unhappy" given all of that? Of course not.

Sounds like me... I also commute to college, have a really old car and never had a girlfriend.

Anyways.....
Happiness is different for each person... A lot of my friends think I'm missing out on youth because I don't go out and parties or drink. Personally, I would rather just hang out and not wake up w/ a hang over. But hey, that's just me.

It's not that I'm anti-social, it's just I don't like to be in that kind of atmosphere.

Also my friends question me being happy because I don't attend or make an attempt to join any clubs at the university. Although I plan on joining one in the future, I have no reason to at the moment because school and work take up too much time. Plus, being that all the clubs meet around 5-8pm and I get out of class around 1pm and the fact my work schedule comes out weekly... On the other hand my friends don't.


When it comes down to it, happiness differs for each person. Some like to goto parties and be wild, some would rather just hang out. So no, I wouldn't question if you are happy or not... As long as you know you are it doesn't matter what others think.

If I spent my time trying to be someone I wasn't, then I would in affect be unhappy...

[Fsiphskilm]

When

[Kaligraphic]

I don't think it's a matter of happiness being relative as it is that people simply have differing desires. Some people like thick, wavy carpet under their feet, others prefer hardwood flooring. Doesn't mean that either is inherently more or less happiness-inducing, it's just personal preference. Some people prefer sweeter foods, others prefer spicy, and still others like their food as bland as can be. Is anyone "missing out" because they don't like my favourite food? No, most people have their own favourite food. (Now if I could just get that through to certain people...)

The Bible says that God will even give you the desires of your heart. He'll give you new wants, and you won't necessarily want the things you used to want. (Yes, I believe that God will fulfill your desires, but I think the more important meaning of that line is that He'll give you the desire itself.) This doesn't mean that you have to pretend to want things. (In fact, pretending to want something will make you feel like you want it even less.) It's like the way you can meet someone who is into anime (or whatever) and they have it around and you eventually end up interested in it. (Same thing for music genres, video games, whatever)

Some of the most miserable people in the world are those who only know what makes other people happy. (Interestingly enough, I happened to see a little bit of the series Peach Girl, and the "villain," Kashiwagi Sae, is exactly this type. She can't figure out what she wants, so she tries to use what other people want instead. Then she gets mad because other people can be happy but she can't. It's a horrible place to be.)

[girlninja]

things that make me happy:

1. Train 20 hours a week, 7 days a week.
2. Gamer girl
3. love to read and draw

Yea people tried to bash it into me that i needed to party and such, shrug* that would mess up my training for one lol

but i think that people are mistaken when they are trying to tell others what will make them happy..instead they should ask what would you like to do that would make you happy and do it! *provided it's not personally harmful and such*

So if you like to Game it up or live like a hermit *heheh i do both lol * then let that be how you should be cuz God gave you desires to do things that you wanna do and no one else can tell you what is best for you ^^

hmmm i should listen to my own advice lol

[mitsuki lover]

Happiness is:
*Enough money to buy three mangas and one DVD
*Getting a PM from one of your friends
*Having plenty of female friends while not worrying about THE ONE
*Knowing that one of these days you will find THE ONE meant for you
*Sunny days
*Finding the book or books you are looking for at the library or a book
sale
*Your team winning the championship after being in last place
*Your kitty purring every time she greets you
*Peanuts always being in the Sunday Funnies
*Snow on Christmas
*Knowing you'll see all your friends in the CAA in Heaven
*Endless Reruns of Inuyasha
*Just sitting in the shadow with a good book and a glass of lemonade on a hot Summer Day.

[White Raven]

I personally find wonderful happiness in drawing and knitting. Some of my 'friends' riticule me because I'm always knitting and drawing. My point is that your life is yours, only you and God know exactly what gives you pleasure. Your 'friends' should be there for you and not 'ruling' you. So, enjoy what you enjoy and serve the Lord, that always picks me up... ( I believe God made it to pick everyone up... though that's just my opinion) Have a *chuckle* 'fun' day.

I know how you feel. Everyone thinks I must be unhappy because I work from home and spend a lot of time at home. I moved to PA so I could start a life with my fiance. I don’t have any friends here because it seems like every one I meet wants to take me out drinking. And I don’t drink. Sometimes I think the only one that understands me is my fiance.
I have just had it with people my age that think the only way to have fun is to go and party!!

[Stephen]

Happiness is a big bag of hamburgers. Its also getting an A on a heavy song on DDR.

[Bunny]

I was driving my brother to his friend's house a couple of weeks ago and since prom was coming up, he immediately made it his job to irritate me. It went down something like this.

Him: Going to any after parties?
Me: We're having it at the house.*can see where this is going already*
Him: You mean you got Mom and Dad to agree to leave? Good goin', sport. That's more than I ever got them to do.
Me: Okay, in all the years that you have known me, what makes you think for even one second that any of my activities would be remotely similar to yours?
Him: Hey! You've never had fun until you've watched a bunch of drunk people.
Me: Yeah, alright. Let me drop all my morals and become like you so I can have my license revoked and depend on my seventeen year old sister to drive me around when I'm twenty-three 'cause that would be fun...AND I SHARED MY TATOR TOTS WITH YOU ! *takes one back*
Him: Easy, killer.

People are so deceived about fun and true happiness.

My idea of happiness:
- getting lost in worship
- making someone smile
- writing something I actually like XD
- getting a new shipment of cd's

[Locke]

Happiness is a big bag of hamburgers. Its also getting an A on a heavy song on DDR.

Dude that is so true.

Happiness is watchin Chappeles show when your sick on a sunny day.

[White Raven]

I was driving my brother to his friend's house a couple of weeks ago and since prom was coming up, he immediately made it his job to irritate me. It went down something like this.

Him: Going to any after parties?
Me: We're having it at the house.*can see where this is going already*
Him: You mean you got Mom and Dad to agree to leave? Good goin', sport. That's more than I ever got them to do.
Me: Okay, in all the years that you have known me, what makes you think for even one second that any of my activities would be remotely similar to yours?
Him: Hey! You've never had fun until you've watched a bunch of drunk people.
Me: Yeah, alright. Let me drop all my morals and become like you so I can have my license revoked and depend on my seventeen year old sister to drive me around when I'm twenty-three 'cause that would be fun...AND I SHARED MY TATOR TOTS WITH YOU ! *takes one back*
Him: Easy, killer.

People are so deceived about fun and true happiness.

That is just like my bro he is reason I don't drink.

[Kaori]

Do you guys feel that happiness is relative to each individual?

I'm slightly surprised that no one has pointed out the obvious answer--though perhaps among Christians it is simply assumed. Clearly, we can only experience true peace and fulfillment when we are living our lives in obedience to God's will. That aside, I do think you are right: specific things that cause pleasure will vary from person to person. I suspect that some ways of seeking happiness, like the constant urge to acquire things, ultimately leave us less happy than we were to begin with.

[mizuhara_fan]

I'm slightly surprised that no one has pointed out the obvious answer--though perhaps among Christians it is simply assumed. Clearly, we can only experience true peace and fulfillment when we are living our lives in obedience to God's will. That aside, I do think you are right: specific things that cause pleasure will vary from person to person. I suspect that some ways of seeking happiness, like the constant urge to acquire things, ultimately leave us less happy than we were to begin with.

Agreed. I think that most people who live life without God really have no right direction in finding true fufillness. Such people will always want more and more to be happy, thus they are never content with what they have. When we understand God and know His plans for us, why should we be unhappy? I guess I should have stated that in the beginning, but it is automatically assumed when you enter a relationship with Christ.

But as far as relating to other people, I myself find happiness when I am by myself. I certainly don't hate being with other people from time to time, it's just that I like spending my time at home doing solitary things. Being with many people at the same time really knocks me out and while my friends hate me for turning them down to invites, I just say that I am more happy being by myself than with the crowd.

Is there any problem with having this kind of attitude?

[Mithrandir]

*shrugs*

Despite what some psycologists may tell you, certain people are wired to be happier around people than by themselves. (Yup, got that advice from a psycotherapist once )

It's important to interact with people, to be sure, but there's nothing inhently wrong with not being happiest when you're around othe people.

[Kaori]

I certainly don't hate being with other people from time to time, it's just that I like spending my time at home doing solitary things. Being with many people at the same time really knocks me out...

I actually am the same way much of the time. I enjoy being with a few other people, but I rarely derive much pleasure from being in a large group setting.

Is there any problem with having this kind of attitude?

Certainly not. Some people do simply need to have time by themselves.

[livewire]

I agree that happiness is individual....in that what makes someone happy is different for every person...
I also agree that being in the light of God and doing His will is the ultimate happiness. Believe me, I understand how it feels to be told that you would be happier only if you follow the ways of the world, which are vbery much in conflict with God's way...
I have always enjoyed crocheting, drawing, writing poetry, reading, playing Super NES games (yeah, I'm a little behind the times), rock climbing, ect... I have always been a people pleaser...it makes me happy to make others happy....
and I have always revelled in the glory of God...
and none of my so called "friends" ever thought it was enough. They pressured me to party... said that I needed a boyfriend and called me "Miss Goody Goody"
I was happy. I was fulfilled doing what made ME happy.
But, after several years of being pressured I started to cave in....
and I became miserable following what my friends wanted me to do. I was so incredibly unhappy that I couldn't handle anything anymore. I felt depressed, anxious, isolated and hollow....
Now, that I am back to doing everything that makes ME happy and doing NOTHING that my so called "friends" had wanted me to do I am much happier...

for me, happiness is:
....knowing I am loved.
....going to church every Sunday.
....writing a poem.
....making someone else happy.
....playing video games w/ my boyfriend (who is a Christian and doesn't pressure me to go against my morals)
....hot chocolate on cold days.
....talking to my mom and my sister and knowing that everything is back to what it should be.
=)
anyways, peace everyone!

[mizuhara_fan]

I actually am the same way much of the time. I enjoy being with a few other people, but I rarely derive much pleasure from being in a large group setting.

...Some people do simply need to have time by themselves.

I guess that's true. It's hard trying to explain to my friends that I needed some time to myself. They thought there was something wrong with me since I wasn't outgoing enough. Though it's only once in a while when I hang out with them that I do have fun and that's after I've had some time for myself.

The fact that my hobbies require only individual thought and work can explain why I also don't like working in groups.

for me, happiness is ....making someone else happy.

I guess now that I think about it, this seems to be another portion of "being happy" that I've often neglected. I used to assume that when you're pleasing other people, you are suddenly being used and drained of your time. Though I've started to humble myself to just please God and not have such an ego about making others happy for MY benefit (which was a feeling of "power" and respect to the person). Pleasing other people for THEIR benefit and helping those in need probably would be the way to go.

It later fills in a void within you, knowing that you did something good for the person and that it is in the "spirit" of the Lord.

[Destroyer2000]

Sometimes I wonder, "What is happiness?" because there are so many times it seems non-existant to me. Anyway, do what you like. Whatever makes you happy. Disregard society.

[EireWolf]

If I spent my time trying to be someone I wasn't, then I would in affect be unhappy...

Exactly.

Happiness is being comfortable in your own skin.

[Fsiphskilm]

Now t