*From the wilderness they emerge looking as if they had spent a year battling some sort of army of rabbid pokemon. The one human, their trainer, was clothed in tattered garments, on his vest were 5, dirty badges. Signs of past struggles long forgotten. The Pokemon that accompanied him were muscular beings covered in the dirt of whatever holy war they were fighting out there. But, there was one thing, above all else that caught the people of Olvine City's attention as the entered it. Something that brought a tear to the eye of even the manliest of men. Each one of them sported an epic, manly beard. Thicker then any anyone had ever seen and stronger too. As the entered the Pokemon center, a nurse behind the front desk fainted from the sheer manliness of such a sight. Onlookers fell to their knees and bowed down to the glory that were those beards. The man and his Pokemon approached the desk as another nurse stared on, her jaw dropped in sheer awe of the spectacle of manliness before here. She shook her head and then proceeded about her buisnees.*
Nurse: Can I...help you?
*She struggled to form the words before such a manly display of manliness. She knew that if she were a poet, she would be composing a thousand sonnets to describe the sheer testosterone those beards emanated. She suddenly wished that they had sent a poet instead of her because such beards deserved that treatment.*
???: I'd like a room for my companions and I.
*The man spoke with a voice that felt like velvet. More girls began to swoon and the nurse started to get nervous.*
Nurse: O...ok.
*The nurse turned to get a key when she realized something, and turned back to the man.*
Nurse: May I ask...what name should I put this room down under?
???: Mr. Hat'n'Clogs. Oh and please make sure I room has a lot of razors and a new set of clothing for me. I've got a date at the nearby Gym and I want to look my best.
Nurse: R...right.
*The nurse turned away and went about setting up there room, though she was confused as to why someone so manly would want to shave a beard like that.*
*Several hours and several thousand Razors later*
Mr. Hat'n'Clogs: Alright guys, its been a long time. But we're finally ready to face Jasmine. We've trained hard and well, I think we're ready. What about you guys?
*firestorm is now a Meganium*
firestorm: I'm ready...to not fight.
Mr. Hat'n'Clogs: Ok...wait what?!
firestorm: Look. We've been through a lot. I know. But I'm just not feeling this Gym. I mean Steel type? Really, what is grass supposed to do against that? I can't even tickle those Pokemon.
Mr. Hat'n'Clogs: Fine...well, looks like we'll have to take someone else in your place.
*Fish'n'Chips is now a Slobro*
Fish: I'll volunteer my services.
Mr. Hat'n'Clogs: Thank you! So that makes our line up Fish'n'Chips, Midori, and finally Mr. Frodo. I'm liking this guys. I'm liking this a lot.
*As they enter the gym a familiar face greets them.*
Random advice dude: Hey I remember you! Geez it feels like its been forever since we last met.
Mr. Hat'n'Clogs: Yeah I've been...busy. So any advice for this gym that I should know?
Random advice dude: The gym leader uses those new fangled Steel type!
Mr. Hat'n'CLogs:....and?
Random advice dude: I've got no clue how to beat them. Good Luck!
Mr. Hat'n'Clogs:...
Jasmine: Oh its you. I was beginning to think you ran away in terror from my awesome Steel might!
Mr. Hat'n'Clogs: I never run! Only back away to re-think my strategy...
Jasmine: So that's what they're calling it these days. Well I suppose we should get this over with.
*Jasmine vs. Mr. HatnClogs*
Mr. Hat'n'Clogs: Time to display the fruits of are labors in the wilderness.
Jasmine: All the training in the world won't be able to break my iron defenses!
Mr. Hat'n'Clogs: We'll see about that. Ready FishnChips!
Fish: You got it!
Jasmine: That's your first Pokemon huh?
Mr. Hat'n'Clogs: Scared yet?
Jasmine: Well...
*Fish vs. Magenimite*
Jasmine: Let's just say I'm prepared for everything.
Mr. Hat'n'Clogs: Wait! I thought you said you didn't use Electric Pokemon?!
Jasmine: I didn't, but then I changed my mind while you were away.
Mr. Hat'n'Clogs:...Ffffffffffffffffff
Fish: Don't worry, I got this. Even if that thing is made of Steel and Electricity it won't be able to stand up against my overwhelming mind!
*Fish uses confusion and its...not that effective.*
Fish: Oh...well maybe Water will do something.
Mr. Hat'n'Clogs: Pff, it'll probably just clean it...
*Fish uses Water gun and defeats the Magenemite*
Mr. Hat'n'Clogs: Well...that was unexpected.
Fish: And easy.
*Midori vs. Magnemite*
Midori: Well if Fish had an easy time, then I'm sure I will have an even easier time thanks to BITE!
*Midori bites the Magenemite which promptly shocks him in response.*
Midori: BZZZZZZZZZZZTTTTTTTT....ok maybe not the best idea...well lets see how you like MONEY!!!
*Midori uses Pay Day which causes a few dents to the Magenemite who promptly shocks him again.*
Midori: Dude this guy is tough...
Fish: Want me to take care of hi--
Midori: NO! No...I got this...I think...
*Midori Tries one more Bite attack as the Magemite shocks him again they both fall down and look to be out.*
Mr. Hat'n'Clogs: MIDORI!!!!
*Midori suddenly pulls himself to his feet panting.*
Midori: Yeah...that's right...I can take anything you can dish out...and then some.
*Midori is victorious*
*Mr. Frodo vs. Steelix*
Jasmine: If you thought he was tough try Steelix on for size!
Midori: Oh...he's kind of big...
Mr. Frodo: I got this one.
Mr. Hat'n'Clogs: You sure? I mean...you aren't exactly the strongest one...here...at all...
Mr. Frodo: You put me in this lineup so let me do my part!
Mr. Hat'n'Clogs: Actually I was kind of hoping that Fish would--
Fish: Let him take care of it.
Mr. Hat'n'Clogs; But Fish...he's the Surf slave. His entire purpose is to let us cross bodies of water. He's not supposed to fight!
Fish: Don't you remember Mr. Hat'n'Clogs. What you said when we were in the wilderness.
Mr. Hat'n'Clogs: Actually I don't my memory's a little...hazy of that time--
Fish: You told us that if we believed in ourselves and spent many hours fighting the same, low level Pokemon over and over again. There was no obstacle that any of us couldn't overcome. Mr. Frodo spent that time grinding away while you weren't looking. And now, we're going to see his power.
Mr. Hat'n'Clogs:...I hope so...
Mr. Frodo: Hey you! Big guy! *The Steelix looks at Mr. Frodo and begins to laugh.*
Mr. Frodo: You think you're pretty tough right? With your fancy steel plating and massive...snake body. Well let me tell you something. By the end of this, you're going to be crying for your mother.
*The Steelix is now rolling on the ground in laughter, and even Jasmine is starting to crack up as well.*
Jasmine: Oh, little dude, you need to learn your place! Steelix, let's teach this one that Goliath isn't garanteed to loose to David.
Mr. Frodo: Heh...well...I've got a better idea...how about you...eat...my...SURRRRRRRRFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!
*The ground begins to rumble as water burst through and into the Gym, forming a giant wave that sweeps down on the now stunned Steelix and throws him into the wall. As the water clears the Steelix appears again, not moving, and with tears in its eyes.*
Mr. Frodo: Heh, what did I say...crying for your mommy.
*Hat'n'Clogs is victorious.*
Jasmine: Wh...what?!
Mr. Hat'n'Clogs: NICE! Alright now give me that new badge!
Jasmine: But...how...how could...
Mr. Frodo: I think we've left her speechless.
Mr. Hat'n'Clogs: Well she shouldn't be. I mean what did you do this entire time we were away? Catch those Magnemites and watch TV?!
Jasmine:...Maybe...anyway...here...take that badge and leave.
------------
*Elsewhere*
???2: He's won another badge finally. But, there's something else.
???1: What might that be?
???3: Our readings seem to indicate some sort of radio spike coming from Mahagony.
???4: We've also received some reports of Gyrados raging in Lake Rage...which seems like it shouldn't be that shocking.
???1: Except their out of season...how odd. Where's the next gym for the subject?
???2: It's in Mahagony.
???1: Well...I think its time the subject meets the Champion.