What does it mean to have a strong relationship with God?

[TopazRaven]

I've been reading through a few different Christian websites lately and noticed some of them say you aren't truly one of God's people unless you seek to have strong and connected relationship with Him. Believing and having faith isn't enough. Wither this is true or not, I do not know, but in all honesty...I am going to admit I do not feel very connected to God. How does one going about creating a stronger relationship with God? I mean, I know not to expect God to speak to me directly or for Jesus to just come strolling through my door one day, but I'm sure you all get what I'm trying to say here.

I read the bible, I pray, I believe in Jesus Christ as my savior...yet I still don't feel anymore connected to our creator then I did before I tried to become a more devout Christian. Sometimes I even still find myself doubting a bit and I don't want to be this way. Is there anything I can do to make my faith stronger and to have a better relationship with God? Also, I know, go to church. A lot of stressful things have happened lately and I got side-tracked. I should be able to go this Sunday, I need to get back there, I know. Maybe that in itself will even help.

As a side note, I also realize I make way to many threads, especially about me personally. It's got to be annoying by now and I feel rather selfish, so this is going to be my last thread for awhile.

[Okami]

One of the ways that I have found has helped me grow closer to God is to get focus off from myself - volunteer my time to others. Often for me this means just sitting and having a conversation with someone, get to know what's going on in their lives and truly be interested in what they have to say. Do what I can to help them where I can while also praying with them when they need it.

Outreach ministry is something I am "forced" to do as a grade at my college, so I make it worth my time and worthwhile, and something I will have fun with. For instance, last semester I spent two hours every Friday morning at a local church helping with a daycare program where we would watch a group of two-year-olds while their moms got the time to have a Bible study.

Praying, reading the Bible, and going to church are all a very good start. The next step I would suggest would be to go out into the community and offer to help where you can. During this past semester I was in a small group about missions and outreach ministry and as our service project we went out to a local home that helps care for people with down syndrome and took the time to hang out with the people there and played a few games of Uno between the men and our group. It was a lot of fun, and I haven't had that much fun in a really long time.

Doing things outside of myself has made me feel more like I am meant to be and do something for the world. However, being an extreme introvert I have made it clear that I have my boundaries and can only do so much before I need to get away and recharge. Most people will respect this from me, and give me my day when I need it to be alone.

God speed in your endeavors to grow closer to Him!

[TopazRaven]

That sounds like a pretty good idea to me. I've honestly really wanted to get out there and do something. I voluenter at a cat shelter, but I want to help people to! It's just, I'm really really shy and I have a bit of a learning disability, so I don't know how to talk to people. I'm always afraid I sound stupid. I also don't know how I could get out there to help. Through church is a good start I'm going to assume. They always have programs for helping others right?

[firestorm]

God is a relational being, he seeks relationships with the ones he created, the ones he loves. Just like how we seek to have relationships with each other. Now how do we develope relationships with each other. By spending time with each other. God is the same way. By spending time in his word, and in prayer, we show God we mean it.
To be honest, I'm in the same boat. So let me tell you what I'm lead to try. Sometimes to understand God's word more you have to go into the real meaning of the original languages. Try a parallel bible that has a direct hebrew or greek translation so you know more of what's really being said. Or try getting a good commentary so you can get someone elses point of view on the verse, sometimes looking things from another person's point of view actually helps you alot.
Also, prayer is a good tool. Try spending some good time in meaning prayer to good. give him some of your hardest questions. Sure he might not answer directly, but you'd be surprised how he can answer through his word and what you might hear if you also present them to your pastor and or family members.
Besides that i also agree with Okami here, application of what we read helps us to get to the next level of our relationship with God because then we actually get to do and see what it takes to follow him. through the trials involved in application we end up requiring him to help us through them, and through our need for interaction and our need for him we grow as well. Probably not all the time will we be in an area in our life that we will be in a situation like that, but regardless you grow in many ways when you practice what is preached in the word.
anyways hope this helps :3
God bless!

[fermy6]

That sounds like a pretty good idea to me. I've honestly really wanted to get out there and do something. I voluenter at a cat shelter, but I want to help people to! It's just, I'm really really shy and I have a bit of a learning disability, so I don't know how to talk to people. I'm always afraid I sound stupid. I also don't know how I could get out there to help. Through church is a good start I'm going to assume. They always have programs for helping others right?

Well when u help out at the cat shelter you are acutally helping people by making the workers jobs easier

[Mr. SmartyPants]

Why do we always have to "feel connected" with God? Only once in a while do I feel "connected" with God, but I believe that I always am. This idea is just stuff that churches like to tell people. But since when was the church ever truly representative of Christ? (Especially in America, good Lord do I have choice words for this...)

I think there comes to a point in a Christian's life where we stop overly obsessing over how Christian or what level our relationship with God is at. I'd like to pull an excerpt out of a book by Thomas Merton, who was a Catholic monk who wrote a lot during the mid 1900s:

"A saint is capable of loving created things and enjoying the use of them and dealing with them in a perfectly simple, natural manner, making no formal references to God, drawing no attention to his own piety, and acting without any artificial rigidity at all. His gentleness and his sweetness are not pressed through his pores by the crushing restraint of a spiritual strait-jacket . . . Hence a saint is capable of talking about the world without any explicit reference to God, in such a way that his statement gives greater glory to God and arouses a greater love of God than the observations of someone less holy, who has to strain himself to make an arbitrary connection between creatures and God through the medium of hackneyed analogies and metaphors that are so feeble that they make you think there is something the matter with religion.

The saint knows that the world and everything made by God is good, while those who are not saints either think that created things are unholy, or else they don’t bother about the question one way or another because they are not interested in themselves.

The eyes of the saint make all beauty holy and the hands of the saint consecrate everything they touch to the glory of God, and the saint is never offended by anything and judges no man’s sin because he does not know sin. He knows the mercy of God. He knows that his own mission on earth is to bring that mercy to all men."

It's never about the feelings, because those feelings are emotional highs that all Christians experience at some point in his or her life. I found that for me, this has died out in frequency over my life. But while it has died out in frequency and severity, it has increased in meaningfulness.

It's also never about what you do. It's about who you are and what your very soul is embodying: Love. To have a strong relationship with God is to do just one thing: Embody love for God and all of God's creation. This means you love every single person you encounter in your life as well as do what you can for those who you have not yet met in your life. Anyone can read a Bible or get up at 8:00 AM on Sunday to go to church and anyone can be a volunteer for community service. But not everyone can be merciful in both action and thought to the most loathsome of people. Actions take place because you choose to embody love.

That's my $0.02

[Furen]

Through church is a good start I'm going to assume. They always have programs for helping others right?

have you found a church you are comfortable with yet? if so it's great to get involved, makes it much more enjoyable.

[rant]
If you haven't than it may be good to find one, or cycle around churches near you. For me personally just joining the CAA was helpful and a huge improvement to my spiritual walk, I am at a church as well, but adding my free time to a site dedicated to Him is what I really needed. Where your heart lies is where you will want to be, so figuring out how to get God involved with your fav pass time will help that. Also, the forced prayer and reading is not good, you have to actually WANT to read to grasp the messages, and prayer without any care doesn't go anywhere, you have to want to talk to God and prey with a willing caring passion.
[/rant]

[Rusty Claymore]

I believe (though I don't have any certifyable credentials) that a realationship with God has nothing to do with feelings at all. Granted I can't realy define a "relationship with God" myself, especially since all my "relations" with God are only realized in hindsight. At perhaps it's simplest, though, having a relationship with God is choosing God and His ways, despite how you feel, or what you desire, or what others tell you.

Of course, it just struck me that it may be our "relationship" with God is on a much bigger scale than our human relationships. Human relationships are instant (usually...) where one says, "How are you?" and the other says, "Fine, thanks." all in a minute. Whereas with God, it's all in our life as a whole. Sometimes it's in seconds, sometimes it's in years. It's not that the "relationship" has ceased, we just can't percieve what is happening sometimes.

And the other half of relationships is, of course, knowing someone. Thats how the whole, "WWJD?" thing started. Course, it should be, "What DID Jesus do?" but anywasy♪... Through the Bible and creation we can come to know God. He is the good shepherd, and the sheep hear His voice and follow Him. The voice of a stranger they will not follow.

...n.n Topaz, you ask really good questions! Keep asking, and keep finding the answers! Sorry I'm so long winded with my responses to such things, but when the gears start turning they don't want to stop... ▬_▬ Anywasy♪, I hope my opinion helps. As always though, stick with the Bible. All the answers are in there. n.n

[Kaori]

First off, there is a difference between having the faith that saves and living the life of a disciple. That you want to grow closer to God is commendable, but you don’t ever have to doubt your salvation because it seems like your walk with God is “not good enough.â€

[TopazRaven]

@ Mr.SmartyPants - That's a very interesting and helpful outlook on things and one I think I like. The bible does stress the importance of love. My problem right now is that I'm not the most loving person I could be. I'm afraid of strangers. Lol.

@ Furen - I never said that I felt forced while praying or reading the bible. I DO enjoy it. I don't pray without care. I pray everyday and talk to God like he's a good friend. Also, I think I found the church I'm going to stay with. I'll know when I go on Sunday.

@ RustyClaymore - You weren't long winded, but where in fact also very helpful so don't apologize!

@ Kaori - You and everyone else are right. I've been focusing way to much on myself and how I'm feeling. I know I'm a really selfish person and I wish I cared more about other people. Helping others and volunteering will hopefully help me to learn to be less selfish.

I guess I should have relized how I feel and how it actually is are two very different things. Thanks to everyone for helping me realize that.

[steenajack]

Why do we always have to "feel connected" with God? Only once in a while do I feel "connected" with God, but I believe that I always am. This idea is just stuff that churches like to tell people. But since when was the church ever truly representative of Christ? (Especially in America, good Lord do I have choice words for this...)

I think there comes to a point in a Christian's life where we stop overly obsessing over how Christian or what level our relationship with God is at. I'd like to pull an excerpt out of a book by Thomas Merton, who was a Catholic monk who wrote a lot during the mid 1900s:

"A saint is capable of loving created things and enjoying the use of them and dealing with them in a perfectly simple, natural manner, making no formal references to God, drawing no attention to his own piety, and acting without any artificial rigidity at all. His gentleness and his sweetness are not pressed through his pores by the crushing restraint of a spiritual strait-jacket . . . Hence a saint is capable of talking about the world without any explicit reference to God, in such a way that his statement gives greater glory to God and arouses a greater love of God than the observations of someone less holy, who has to strain himself to make an arbitrary connection between creatures and God through the medium of hackneyed analogies and metaphors that are so feeble that they make you think there is something the matter with religion.

The saint knows that the world and everything made by God is good, while those who are not saints either think that created things are unholy, or else they don’t bother about the question one way or another because they are not interested in themselves.

The eyes of the saint make all beauty holy and the hands of the saint consecrate everything they touch to the glory of God, and the saint is never offended by anything and judges no man’s sin because he does not know sin. He knows the mercy of God. He knows that his own mission on earth is to bring that mercy to all men."

It's never about the feelings, because those feelings are emotional highs that all Christians experience at some point in his or her life. I found that for me, this has died out in frequency over my life. But while it has died out in frequency and severity, it has increased in meaningfulness.

It's also never about what you do. It's about who you are and what your very soul is embodying: Love. To have a strong relationship with God is to do just one thing: Embody love for God and all of God's creation. This means you love every single person you encounter in your life as well as do what you can for those who you have not yet met in your life. Anyone can read a Bible or get up at 8:00 AM on Sunday to go to church and anyone can be a volunteer for community service. But not everyone can be merciful in both action and thought to the most loathsome of people. Actions take place because you choose to embody love.

That's my $0.02

Pretty much what he said.

Basically, God is love and love is God. He wants to spend time with us, we were created for relationships. Hang out with us even.

Also, Mr. Smartypants is right, it's not about works or what you do at all. God is into your heart. He loves you for you! He wants to be a part of your heart so much. He is our creator, father, friend....everything.

Okay, I feel led to give you a PM. I want to link you to a few things that you may like.

[TGJesusfreak]

All I can say is listen to what other have said. I dont wanna waste your time repeating what everyone else has said.

Basically the end result of trusting God is an ability to trust him in anything, even to death. Like paul when he was in prison when he wrote philipians (on of his happiest and joyful letters). He was in jail! yet he was happy in everything. and you might say that paul is an excepton, but if you recal paul said many many times that he was not anywhere adiquet (sp?) for the job god had given him.

[Hiryu]

Don't feel like you're being a nuisance by asking questions. It encourages debate and the growing of not only yourself but everyone else here too.

[FllMtl Novelist]

Don't feel like you're being a nuisance by asking questions. It encourages debate and the growing of not only yourself but everyone else here too.

Yeah. I've found this topic in particular to be very interesting and relevant to me. I've been Christian my whole life, but I'm confused or clueless about a lot of things. (Which irks me. )

I also like it when a topic that I haven't thought much about comes up. Then I get a surprise opportunity to think about something I wouldn't have thought of normally, if that makes any sense. XD

So yeah, don't be too hard on yourself about asking so many questions. XD

[TopazRaven]

Thanks Hiryu and FllMtl, it's good to know I'm not being annoying then. I'm always afraid I'm bother people. xD

[Rusty Claymore]

I'm always afraid I'm bother people. xD

I thought friends were defined as a bunch of people who habitually bother eachother? >_</)

[TopazRaven]

I'm bother people? My grammer is so amazing isn't it? Hm, I dare say you are right Rusty. I do seem to enjoy annoying my friends offline in least. xD

[FllMtl Novelist]

I thought friends were defined as a bunch of people who habitually bother eachother? >_</)

Only if they're such close friends they're like siblings, or vice versa. But yeah. XD

[That Dude]

Raven,

As others have said, following Christ and having a salvific (salvation oriented) relationship is not emotions based, mind you, they are important and can help us grow, but it can get dangerous to our spiritual growth when we equate feelings with sanctification (growth in Christ). Many of the greats of the faith experienced many times when they felt they were far away from God but grew all the more mature in Christ regardless of their feelings, like Paul says in 2nd Corinthians 12:7-10.

One thing to always check is to see where you're motivation lies, are you doing things to try and please God and win him over, or are you doing things because you know that he's already payed the price for you to be his own, and are now motivated by thankfulness and love towards him?

Remember, you don't have to win over Gods favor, Rom 5:8 says "that while we were still sinners Christ died for us." Christ died for those he counted as enemies -which Romans 5 also says we were- so if God sent Christ to die for his enemies, which we were before we were saved by him, that means that we don't have to try and please God, we just need to love him for the great mercy and grace he's shown us, and let our actions flow out of that gratefulness towards him.

Mind you I am not saying that we shouldn't do good works, because like James says, faith without works is dead, and like Eph 2:10 says, we were created to do good works in him. Just remember they key words are IN HIM, don't get confused and let your motivation be to do good works FOR HIM, but IN HIM.

I find that when you address the motivations behind the feelings, it clears things up. So I hope this helps you some.

[TopazRaven]

You make a lot of sense That Dude, thanks to you and everyone else who has posted, I think I understand things a little better. You have indeed helped me out here.

[Nanao]

hi Raven i think you are asking some really good questions. the topics you bring up are ones that i've struggled with as well. other people before me have posted some really good replies so i'll just add a couple of things.

I've been reading through a few different Christian websites lately and noticed some of them say you aren't truly one of God's people unless you seek to have strong and connected relationship with Him. Believing and having faith isn't enough.

what's made the biggest difference for me in my relationship with God was realising that I need to stop letting other people define what my Christian life should look like. what does God say? what does the Bible say? as humans we like to make rules and laws. not to say that rules and laws are bad, but some things are more essential than others. what is God telling you that your relationship with him should look like?

I am going to admit I do not feel very connected to God. How does one going about creating a stronger relationship with God?

feelings can be a tricky thing sometimes. i often don't feel very connected to God either, but i know by faith and by experience that i am connected to him. it's ok to struggle with that. i struggle with it all the time, and it took me a long time to realise just how connected to God i was.

in addition to all the other great things people have suggested, you might just try asking God for a closer relationship. ask him to make himself real to you, then be open to seeing him work in your life.

~ risa