Who is Chuck Norris?

Postby **Stephen** » Mon Apr 10, 2006 11:41 am

If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.

Postby **Peanut** » Tue Apr 11, 2006 7:12 pm

You know, the original idea for surivor was to put a bunch of people on an island with Chuck Norris. But, no one survived...

Also, (an American History related Chuck Norris joke) Andrew Jackson was really Chuck Norris in disguise.

Postby **Sun.Ice** » Thu Apr 13, 2006 1:32 pm

Chuck Norris eh? At my school in the band room we get these messages on the board, "Chuck Norris is coming to get you" or "Chuck Norris will rip your arm off and beat you with it."

Chuck seems like a nice guy...lol.

Postby **Zilch** » Thu Apr 13, 2006 2:07 pm

Ark wrote:Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

<breathe>

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

<die>

Postby **TallasLint** » Thu Apr 13, 2006 3:16 pm

Chuck Norris's tears cure cancer. Too bad he doesn't cry.

Postby **Destiny** » Thu Apr 13, 2006 3:26 pm

XD His movies are really... cheesy. And his infomercial thing is on ALL THE TIME now! Is he getting oldish?? I think I saw that he was getting some grey hair or something...

Postby **Radical Dreamer** » Thu Apr 13, 2006 6:04 pm

Chuck Norris destroyed the Periodic Table of the Elements, because the only element Chuck acknowledges is the Element of Surprise.

Postby **rii namuras** » Fri Apr 14, 2006 9:57 am

("Rob Fee and David Parker got into a fight with Chuck Norris... Chuck won, but it was close.

LIES! - David and Rob")

Postby **Warrior 4 Jesus** » Fri Apr 14, 2006 10:01 am

He's the alpha and omega of corny action films. Loud punching noises when he kicks bad guys (stuff like that).

Postby **Stephen** » Fri Apr 14, 2006 10:05 am

Canada's attempt to invade American soil in 1984 was foiled after quick action by the US government to send in Chuck Norris; the amphibious assault was obliterated. After the battle Chuck Norris walked on water, not due to divine intervention, more so that the bodies of Chuck's victims filled Lake Erie.

Postby **Ai-chan** » Fri Apr 14, 2006 4:03 pm

He's my dad's "hero of the forever" as dad would call him. I think he's in a new movie, but I can't for the life of me remember what the movie is called. one of his movies's "A Force of One" we had the main badguy, "superfoot" Wallace come in and teach us sparring in our Karate class.

Postby **Allegro** » Fri Apr 14, 2006 4:37 pm

Missing in action was an awesome movie because of Norris. The cheesiness of his image is probably the reason why so many people like him. That and his fitness informercials.

Postby **Wise Dragon** » Mon Apr 17, 2006 4:56 pm

Ai-Chan wrote:we had the main badguy, "superfoot" Wallace come in and teach us sparring in our Karate class.

Thats awesome. Kinda reminds me of when this one karate instructor around here grew a beard and did his hair to look just like Chuck Norris. Some of the people who didn't really know him were asking for his autograph. It didn't help that his reall name was actually Chuck. A lot of the instructors around here really had a long laugh when he did that.

Postby **mitsuki lover** » Fri Apr 21, 2006 3:25 pm

I liked the one with the series with the fat Chinese Martial Artist in it better.I think it was Martial Law or something like.

Who is Chuck Norris?

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