I have never had a girlfriend.

Talk about anything in here.

Postby agasfas » Sat Dec 03, 2005 11:13 pm

Dude, I think you are trying too hard to rationalize love, dating etc when it's anything but rational. There's no one definate answer to that kind of stuff. Everyone is different and so are their perferences. It's crazy.

Though I can understand your confusion because I'm in the same boat. I've never had a girl friend, but I still talk with girls and joke around and enjoying each others' company. It's just putting yourself out there and willing to take the chance... knowing it may not work out. That's life and sometimes it'll hurt. But if it's something that means a lot to us, why wouldn't we be willing to give it that shot?

ANd to answer your last question, a crush is a crush. Saved or not. Though, I wouldn't invest in a relationship w/ someone whom is unsaved. I can see how we can turn off a crush because we learn another side of them we disporve of, but... we all have our own reasons for crushing... there isn't a right or wrong answer.
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Postby Maledicte » Sat Dec 03, 2005 11:16 pm

Haha neither have I :P
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Postby Scribs » Sat Dec 03, 2005 11:17 pm

I have a girlfriend, so um, I guess I dont have much to say on this thread, except as a way of encouragement, this qoute from the Mikado-
You'll find there are many
Who'll wed for a penny,
There are lots of good fish in the sea
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Postby roadoffew » Sat Dec 03, 2005 11:28 pm

well, we've heard everybody elses statements. Now here's mine.

I've never had a girlfriend. I have had crushes on many girls, and I regret all of them.
Crushes will simply cloud your mind of reality. Also, you should never wonder if someone is giving you signs that they like you. There is no such thing. They are only acts of kindness and We have to understand that it is only that. We also have to realize that there is such a thing as enjoying someone and it not being "in love".

And another thing, we shouldn't sit around and dream of having a girlfriend. We should be more focused on Christ and his plan for our lives. You will not find your true love by looking for them or them looking for you; You look towards God, and he will make sure to bump into your true love in the process.

As for me, I beginning think that maybe God doesn't plan for me to be married; which I don't have a problem with.
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Postby Scribs » Sat Dec 03, 2005 11:31 pm

Considering that you are only 18... who knows what God has planned for your life. The perfect girl could be right arround the corner, you never know.
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Postby Sam*ron » Sat Dec 03, 2005 11:37 pm

roadoffew wrote:sorry but I'm just really board. It is true by the way.

I guess this can become a thread for guys like me or something.



I've never had a boyfriend, is that weird??
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Postby Scribs » Sat Dec 03, 2005 11:39 pm

Not at all, you are 15. Dont rush things, you have pleanty of time befor you need to be thinking about that.
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Postby the_lizardqueen » Sat Dec 03, 2005 11:47 pm

I've never had a boyfriend and I'm ooooold.

Ah well, post-secondary is hardly giving me time for sleeping and eating. I think I'd go crazy if I tried to jam a relationship into the mix.
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Postby Warrior 4 Jesus » Sun Dec 04, 2005 12:21 am

I've never had a girlfriend and I'm older! (so there) lol
Keep your eyes fixed on Jesus and He will do the rest. And yes, 15 is too young.
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Postby Kiba-kun » Sun Dec 04, 2005 12:23 am

i've had three girl friends, one lasted awhile and had to stop since she moved, the second i regret completely, and the third i just didn't open up enough, so for now i'm single
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Postby Yojimbo » Sun Dec 04, 2005 12:42 am

Sam*ron wrote:I've never had a boyfriend, is that weird??


I haven't either.]real[/I] girlfriend. In the way that you knew you "were going out" or whatever. I've had some fleeting relationships but they were just your typical puppy love variety. So therefore I don't really consider them girlfriends because it never got to that point and was over so quickly. I realize now how stupid and pointless it was, but I don't dwell on it too much. Over and done with ya learn from things like that.
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Postby roadoffew » Sun Dec 04, 2005 1:42 am

I can't stand that way of putting it. "going out" or "they are a couple" to me make the relationship sour or It has the look of just being for popularity.
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Postby ashfire » Sun Dec 04, 2005 8:17 am

I had girlfriends off and on through my years. I had the puppy love in the frist grade for a girl in my class and was also in my church. Her family moved away later and my family moved because my father was in the service and was transfered to Wash. DC. Then there were girls I had feelings for has I got older as I went through the years in school.
Then I joined the volunteer fire dept and there were girls around has members or who were involved with the fire service who I would go out on dates with.
Later there was a young lady in our ladies auxiliary who had the love at first sight when she seen me and we were together for a long time. Alot of people disapproved of our relationship because of her medical problems and mentality due to something that happen to her as a infant which kept her from having a drivers license.
Things took a turn for the worse when her mother died and she got depressed over it and her father had been planning to move from the area to be closer to his job which was 45 minutes away which put alot into going to get her for a date drive back to where we could go dating take her back home and drive past where we would have gone to date to go home.
So in a way I have been without a girlfriend for years.
Just this last month one of the ladies from my old anime club went with me and shared a hotel room for the anime con we went to.
We had two beds in the room so there was no fooling around because we were so tired when we got back to the room all we cared about was sleeping and getting back over to the con in the morning. Being I was on the con staff I was kept busy while she was enjoying the show, but she has told me she wants to be on the staff next year so I guess we will be traveling together again next year. Now acourse she lives about a hour away from where I live but she drives a car and has a government job where she lives.
I guess I would say I have feelings for her being we are adults and she is 20 years younger than me (She's 30), but time, work, time of the season (meaning weather) and distance have a factor on us seeing each other right now.
When our anime club was around , we got to talk during breaks or when the club went on trips for cons or other activities.
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Postby Heart of Sword » Sun Dec 04, 2005 8:39 am

And yes, 15 is too young.

I don't really agree with the whole "you aren't old enough to date" thing. There isn't anything in the Bible that says "thou shalt not date at 15"...I think it has more to do with spiritually maturity; I know 13 year olds who are more mature spiritually than some adults/older teens I know.
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Postby Warrior 4 Jesus » Sun Dec 04, 2005 8:43 am

Okay, sorry HoS. Its just that many 15 year old girls I know aren't mature enough for a relationship of that calibre. Guess I shouldn't have used a sweeping statement.
My apologies!
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Postby yukinon » Sun Dec 04, 2005 8:43 am

There is also the question of where you are in life however. I think a person should have a relatively solid idea of where they want to go in life before they consider merging their life with someone else's.

(oi, merging wasn't quite the right word but I can't think of anything else.)

For the record, I didn't have a boyfriend until I was 19 and a college sophomore.
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Postby Azier the Swordsman » Sun Dec 04, 2005 8:48 am

I never even had a chance.
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Postby Warrior 4 Jesus » Sun Dec 04, 2005 8:49 am

Yes, well I'm 22 and I've never had a girlfriend, serious or otherwise. But God's got it under control. He'll provide. You have a point though yukinon. You also have to love yourself as a person before you can love someone else. I have depression/anxiety/self-esteem issues and don't have a job -don't know what life has instore for me. If I didn't place my trust in God I would be stuffed. Its hard but I think those things need to be sorted properly before God brings a girlfriend into the picture.
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Postby Warrior4Christ » Sun Dec 04, 2005 8:55 am

Nor have I.

(Well that was a worthwhile post.)
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Postby Warrior 4 Jesus » Sun Dec 04, 2005 8:56 am

Bit more depth please Sam. Come on! Pour out your heart and soul bro! (lol)
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Postby Warrior4Christ » Sun Dec 04, 2005 9:16 am

I think everyone else has just about covered what I was going to add.
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Postby Tommy » Sun Dec 04, 2005 10:20 am

I have and I think I`m the youngest in here....funny, it seems like the younger generation seems to have relationships more. I have had girlfriends here and there but it never lasts long. It`s not really a wise decision to date when your young since guys my age usually just have a relationship with the opposite sex so they can say "I have a girlfriend" without lying. there are some mature kids around like 13 that can give a good relationship. Sounds weird, but I have seen it.
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Postby Scribs » Sun Dec 04, 2005 11:41 am

Regardless of spiritual maturity, I really do not think that 15 is old enough to date. The whole point of dating is to find a future spouse, and at 15, that goal is too far away. 3 years befor it is even legal, and another 3 or 4 befor it is really practical. At that age it serves no real puropse and can lead to trouble. Thats my take on it.
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Postby Mr. SmartyPants » Sun Dec 04, 2005 12:03 pm

[quote="Heart of Sword"]I don't really agree with the whole "you aren't old enough to date" thing. There isn't anything in the Bible that says "thou shalt not date at 15"...I think it has more to do with spiritually maturity]

It's not only a matter of spiritual maturity. It's about mental maturity. The point of dating is? To get married! You can't get married if your young, or unable to financially support a family. (Or even drive) and stuff. A lot of factors go into it. Also young teenagers generally have a lot of random crushes and infatuations and such. (Raging hormones) and its all spontaneous and such
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Postby Debitt » Sun Dec 04, 2005 12:31 pm

^_^; Sorry if I seem to be missing the entire point of the thread...but I don't see the point in bragging about the fact that you have/have not had a girlfriend/boyfriend. Additionally, I see complaining about the lack of a significant other as equally unproductive.

Haven't had a girlfriend/boyfriend before? I think it's awesome that you don't feel the peer pressure to conform to a society where significant others seem, at times, to be treated more like prize trophies than people we love.

Have had a girlfriend/boyfriend before? Have one now? I'm equally happy for you, and I hope that God will lead you in your relationship.

But in the end - TO EACH HIS OWN. Everyone finds "the one" at different times in their lives, and only God knows when that will happen. Again, I apologize if I seem to be misinterpreting what's been said here, but those who have never had a girlfriend/boyfriend (unless, of course, you're younger, then I would hope you haven't dated yet anyways. XD; ) are no more following God's will for their lives than the people who are in a loving, godly relationship with someone else. If someone is dating and their relationship is of God, then I believe that they have the right to feel happy and complete, especially if the said relationship is leaning towards marriage.

At any rate, yes I've had boyfriends before. No, it didn't quite work out, but I think that God has definitely drawn me closer to Him through these experiences. God will provide in the end - I know he has provided for me already on a spiritual level. ^^
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Postby Ashley » Sun Dec 04, 2005 12:41 pm

Well said, Koko!

Yukinon wrote:For the record, I didn't have a boyfriend until I was 19 and a college sophomore.

Ditto! Except I was 18 and a sophomore in college. ^^;;
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Postby Azier the Swordsman » Sun Dec 04, 2005 12:56 pm

I guess I must be different than the average person. The reason I've never dated was because, I guess deep in my mind, I'm not looking for a girlfriend. I'm looking for a soulmate. Not some relationship that will not last in the end. I want to find the one I literally want to spend the rest of my life with and stick with her.

Someone who-

Loves God.

Loves me.

Is attractive.

Loves gaming.

(If you think that you match these qualifications, you can send all wife applications to Chris4150_1@hotmail.com You must be 17 or older (No jailbait, please) to apply. If you qualify, we will have our wedding in the CAA chat courtesy of Rev. Doc. Must not be a psychopathic stalker and must be willing to dress in neko wear for the wedding and wedding night. Photo ID and background check required.)

All joking aside, I really mean everything I said above. Unfortunately, I have yet to find this person. And I'm a little depressed about it too.
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Postby roadoffew » Sun Dec 04, 2005 1:36 pm

As for the "too young or not to date", I was 15 before and I agree, that's too young. Even if you are a mature christian. I don't think I had the mental capacity that made it okay to date until 17. Even though I never dated.
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Postby Warrior 4 Jesus » Sun Dec 04, 2005 5:11 pm

I think most of us are looking for that kind of relationship Azier. But I don't like the word "soulmate" it sounds to new agey, but that's just me.

Kokoro, you have very good points there, but I think you were a tad harsh. I didn't see anyone bragging about being single. From what I've read (and contributed) people are commenting whether they are single or not and their reasons and discussing the issues. I think its quite interesting.
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Postby ~Natsumi Lam~ » Sun Dec 04, 2005 7:05 pm

i married my first boy friend and i didnt start dating until i was 18.... and i dated him for 4 yrs....


wait it is worth it!!

Only mistake...... i should have waited till after college!!

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