Why would you get married?!

[shooraijin]

I think it would be very sad if I had children because I would never be a good mother, and they would grow to hate me.

I'm certainly not planning to have children either, but that's a pretty heavy statement. Why would they grow to hate you?

[Eriana]

It's a huge decision for married couples, but I think God will give me a husband who wants kids. If you think you'll be a bad mother then maybe you'll change your mind later, or maybe you weren't supposed to have kids.
I adore children so I think that I will be gifted with them. Having butterflies about being a suitable parent I think is natural, but just follow what God says and He'll let you know what to do. I just believe that it would be so amazing watching my kids grow up in age and in God. I can't wait to be a mother. I still have a long way to go before I am old enough but it's okay. When I move to Japan I'm sure that I will find my husband there. I'm not trying to preach that everyone should have children, It's really their own decision.

[mitsuki lover]

I know my last post was a bit extreme in giving reasons why I MIGHT NOT marry.
On the other hand we have no idea what the future will bring us so anything and
everything could reasonably happen.I mean someone who here says that they
might not get married might in the next six months find someone they really love
and desire to be with for the rest of their life.
Also to be serious I know I have made some really great female friends on this
forum(sao__sakura and Starfire for example)and despite teasing them from time
to time I'm glad I met them.
So I do hope when I find the right woman for me that she's as nice as my friends here.

[That Dude]

I don't think that you could find someone in real life as nice as people here ML...Kidding!

[RoyalWing]

I'm certainly not planning to have children either, but that's a pretty heavy statement. Why would they grow to hate you?

If I wasn't a good mother all their lives, do you think they would like me and want to spend time with me? I don't think so. I would want to get away from this person as fast as I can, because all they did was bring pain and extra stress into my life instead of supporting me, or at least respecting my choices.

[Kenshin17]

I have to say reading this thread gave me lots of warm fuzzies.

As for myself...because I've always wanted to? Seriously, my dream in life since I was a kid was always to be a godly mother and wife like my mother before me. I know quite frankly that I do NOT have the gift of singleness, and the idea of being able to open up to someone about absolutely anything in the world, to run into their arms crying and know they'll be there for you, forever...I don't know, it's just what I've always wanted in life. That sounds really selfish, but honestly, I get a great amount of joy being able to do that for my love, too.

Honestly, I've grown a lot spiritually just from dating a godly Christian guy, so I can't imagine what it would be like to be married and experience that growth on an even DEEPER level. That's also really exciting.

I've also heard that being married is like being a projector screen to your community to see God's love in a very pratical way in your life. Good, lasting, biblical marriages are so rare these days, I think being married would be a great way to be a witness to those around us, and make them ask "what's different about those two?"

Many other people, especially BobtheDuck and D-shim said exactly what I wanted to, so I won't take up much more space repeating their words. ^^

Ver well said. I may sound a bit odd or something but as a guy I like hearing that from a girl. Seriously, I read your post and was like "Wow thats totally awesome." Just felt the need to say so.

And I agree with you. I am not blessed with singleness

[mitsuki lover]

The only problem is I have been single so long that getting married would be a real shocker to me.For example I like watching certain shows at certain times and I also like eating certain foods for my meals.I mean I can imagine our first food(i.e.me and my imaginary wife)will be something like:
Her:Why are we watching Digimon?
Me:I LIKE Digimon.
Her:Grow up and watch something MATURE!
Me:Yeah,but Inuyasha's not on until 12:30 a.m.
Her:Grrrrr!
Or:
Her:Why do we have to have biscuits EVERY WEDNESDAY?
Me:My dad makes biscuits every Wednesday.
Her:I'm NOT your father if you haven't noticed!
Well hope that my wife is an anime fan and also likes Digimon so we can
avoid #1 however I don't know how to avoid #2.

[That Dude]

Eat the same food but throw out the tradition and have it on Tuesdays Mitsuki Lover.

[Kaligraphic]

Just say that you like biscuits on Wednesdays. It's okay to be boring about what you eat. I know I tend to be.

And invest in a VCR or similar device (DVD Recorder, Tivo-analog (don't go with the Tivo company, though), whatever) and record your shows - Inuyasha will suddenly be on at any hour. Or just get the box sets and you can have the whole series.

[Bobtheduck]

"Don't marry someone you can live with. Marry someone whom you can't live without."

That's pretty much the way I feel, but... *sigh*When you find that person you can't live without, sometimes they will live without you, and that's much much worse than not having found someone you feel that way about to begin with.

I wish I was like my roomate. No romantic desires whatsoever. It would just make things much more simple... And less painfull.

[Fsiphskilm]

"Chang

[Ashley]

I think the idea of 'compatibility lists' is the driving force behind pre-marital counseling, and I would not even consider getting married without such counseling. Basically, you have a pastor whom you trust sit down and MAKE you talk about things you probably haven't thought about yet because you're so in love; my parents said it saved them a ton of heartache, and probably is the #1 reason they've been married for over 20 years now.

[shooraijin]

Men and women spend millions of dollars every year on "Marrage Counciling" and Books, and CDs and DVD on how to "understand each other". I think it's silly and ridiculous. TALK, express your opinions, tell each other how you feel about a specific problem. For the love of God, you live in the same house.

But some people don't know how to broach the topic. Obviously you have no trouble opening your mouth but others would find it terrifying and not know where to start. At least those kinds of books or counseling exercises give people a structure to work within.

And most of what you said would be covered by a good pre-marital counseling session with a trusted pastor. I know pre-marital counseling is something *I* would want. I don't know all the questions to ask my potential wife about compatibility issues or things that will come up during marriage, because I'm not married yet! This allows the experience of someone else who's been there to direct you to the problems and pitfalls that may not be obvious to the untrained eye.

In fact, I would worry about a person in a relationship who does *not* want to undergo such scrutiny. This either implies insecurity, duplicity or naivete (or all of the above).

After all that, though, you didn't answer the question. Why would you, Volt, get married?

[Ashley]

Wow, Shooby and I are on the same brain wave frequency. Freaky!

[shooraijin]

And at nearly exactly the same time.

[Warrior 4 Jesus]

The foundation of one's marriage should be Jesus and then you can build on from there. I think its definetly a good idea to get pre-marriage counselling before thinking of marriage. Its an excellent idea. Trust and honesty are also key ingredients and listening to each other is really important also.

But what would I know? I'm single.
(But when the time's right, God will provide).

[Rev. Doc]

Sadly, as has been said, people spend more time and preparation in obtaining a drivers license than they do a wedding license. I definately agree with the above. Take the time to seek pre-marital counseling.

[Warrior 4 Jesus]

That reminds me. I need to go for my driver's license.

[uc pseudonym]

Volt's main point I agree with. If you don't even know basic facts like that about someone, you certainly aren't ready to marry them. On the other hand, it's also almost certain you'll run into other, minor things that will be pet peeves. Presumably you can transcend some petty differences for the sake of someone that important to you.

Random note regarding the base of relationships: some people have a tendency to allow other people to determine their worth, be it their friends, their spouse or their superiors at work. When humans look to God for their value, relationships are generally much healthier.

[Eriana]

Or just get the box sets and you can have the whole series.

Not all the box sets for Inuyasha are out yet. ^^ Only one and the second will be this November 8th.

That reminds me. I need to go for my driver's license.

lol.

[mitsuki lover]

According to an interview I read Kirby Morrow says they won't be done with the dubbing until December.
back on topic:I think my biggest problem is where am I going to find the right type of girl for me?I don't exactly live in a town full of eligible singles.The fact is outside
of the CAA I don't know any girls/young women who share my interest in anime.

[Fsiphskilm]

Wife:"

[mitsuki lover]

I think though when it comes down to it,you have to be willing to wait for the right person to come along.And most of us don't have that much patience.

[Fsiphskilm]

To me,