Postby The Doctor » Wed Feb 23, 2005 10:14 am
Wow.
Thank you all for posting. First off, let me tell you that it is a pleasure to meet all of you. I'm encouraged that all of you have come here and opened yourselves up like this.
I'm sad there are people who have experienced loneliness like I have, or worse. But let us be thankful we have an Awesome God to Whom we can boldly turn to in times of need, and Who provides above and beyond what we need.
Dragonshimmer, thank God I put this thread here, not me. I ALMOST didn't make it, then decided to anyway.
Let me warn you guys that our feelings of loneliness provides an opportunity for the enemy, satan, to get us to disobey God and follow our own path, to do something that Satan promises will satisfy our needs, when in reality it makes things worse.
For those of you who struggled with being alone, without friends, I understand your pain. Many years throughout my life I would spend my time at home, with no one. I had one real friend (it isn't until now I admit how he wasn't really a good friend at all, though) and that was it for awhile. I've been sheltered much of my life. But God, in His grace, has provided me these past 3-4 years with a great group of guys, a "Band of Brothers" we call ourselves. We study His Word together every sunday and sharpen and encourage one another. It's great. So I want to encourage you that you won't be "alone" forever. Ask God and He will provide, trust in Him. If He can provide me with friends like these, imagine what He can do for you.
Be on your guard, however, when it comes to non-Christians. I don't believe it's wrong to have non-Christian friends, obviously, but you don't want them to be your close, personal friends. The reason why is because having close friends like that who don't have the truth will, eventually, influence you and drag you down. "Do not be deceived. Bad company corrups good morals." the Bible says. But seek out Godly friends, Christians sharp as iron, so you can sharpen and encourage each other.
For those of you who feel alone in the sense that you will never get married, or what not, let me again warn you that the non-Christian field will look very good when it seems they are the only ones giving a rip about you. I myself confess that I pursued that route when it looked like that was the only one interested. Thank God He shut the door in my face.
When you look at it in the long term, know that you both would be unable to share that personal, most important and binding part of you with the other. You would both have a divide between you that would prevent true oneness, as God intended. You couldn't share all your heart, mind, and spirit with each other, always that one thing seperating you both. And in the end, you would have even more heartbreak than before.
Don't think I'm a master of all of this. To this day I'm still tempted with the above, and have entertained or attempted the wrong road. But I'm still trying and committed to staying the right course. Just don't open yourself up to heartbreak. You think you feel alone now? Just wait if you go down that course. :-(
So what is the answer then?
Well, we must more people for us to rally around with, right?
Easier said than done, I know. However, it is possible. We just have to go out there and try and meet new people.
I did this on SuperBowl Sunday. I went to a church college youth party. I knew two guys there already. Guess who I spent most of my time with? ;-)
However, I did talk with and meet new people. I didn't make any best friends there, but I did talk to others, and that's the point! We don't have to make best friends (or life partners) in 30 minutes. Just go out there and talk and see what develops in God's time.
As part of my going out in the world, I'll even be attending a Church Sunday Morning Study for the college youth, should be fun. And oh yeah, forgot to mention that on my way home from the superbowl party, I got lost and ended up in Dayton, Ohio...and I had class in the morning. ( LOL)
Here's an example: I have a great Christian friend and mentor, whom we will call Scott. When I first met him, I had no idea how close we would be, and now he's one of the men God's used in my life to help turn me into...well, a man! And a Godly one at that. He holds me accountable, helps me grow, talks with me, a great guy all around. And it was God who engineered our friendship. In fact, God engineered all of my Godly friendships. It wasn't me.
That's the other point: trust in God. Ask Him and He will provide for you, even above and beyond what you ask.
As with all things, I have not mastered everything I've listed here. I'm still learning and trying, so don't feel THAT BAD if at first you don't get it right. (But don't take that as license to fail forever either).
Just keep trying your best.
I want us to all pray for each other here. I will pray for all who have posted in this thread, and ask you to do the same for each other, and me.
Oh yeah, and notice how those of us who are lonely, have just met new people to talk with? Of course, that was the point of this thread. ;-)
My name's Robert, and it's a pleasure to meet all of you. :-)
In Christ--