Do men and women think differently?

[Kura Ookami]

Agasfas, that is funny.

Anyway back on topic.

1 - Women can read emotions far better than men.
A couple walks into a room full of people. The man sees a bunch of people in a room talking in groups of two to five. He will also notice where the food and bar is and notice any exceptionally attractive women in the room. That's it!

His female companion, however, will be able to tell the man which woman is angry, which is lonely, which is jealous, which is upset, which is happy, which feel self-concious, which are confident in themselves and probably which ones are having affairs and with which men. A woman would be able to tell all these things within ten seconds of entering the room.

This ability comes at a price, however,. Women are also far more sensitive to emotional pain. Imagine a man whos skin was so sensitive that every time someone shook his hand in greeting or clapped him on the back in congratulations it felt to him like boiling water had just been thrown on his flesh. Now turn that idea of physical sensitivity to emotional sensitivity and you've got a fundamental difference between men and women.

Men seldom, if ever, need to know what the people they're talking to are thinking so they usually experience a womans heightened sensitivity from a negative viewpoint. They hurt their womens feelings without realising it just like the handshake in the previous paragraph and then dont know why the woman is upset with them often for days or weeks at a time for seemingly no reason.

2 - Men have integrity to their word, however, women have integrity to their feelings
In other words a woman will not do something if it no longer "feels" right. This is due to the heightened sensitivity as explained above. Women base their actions on how they feel at the time, which means that if they've set a date up and it no longer "feels" right they just wont go on the date.

It infuriates most men when a woman "flakes" on them. (Flakinf is a term men use to describe when a woman who has eagerly made plans with them doesnt show up, or calls at the last minute to cancel because her girlfriend needs consoling etc. Generally speaking the probability of a woman flaking is proportional to her options and inversely proportional to her age.

The need to be true to ones feelings is extrememly powerful for women. Just look at the dominant theme in romance stories. A woman is "swept away" by feelings too powerful to control and has an affair with every man everyone knows she shouldnt.. Another example is the phrase "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned." You see women throwing things at their husbands when they're angry in extreme cases. Can you imagine a man doing this? The idea is ludricous.

A man will probably do what he has agreed to do.like help someone move for example, because he said he would. However, he wouldnt go through with his plans to help his friend move if it had become a felony with a mandatory 10-year prison sentence to do so would he? Ten years in prison trumps a promise to move furniture. Well, that is the kind of aversion women have when things no longer "feel" right.

3 - Most women are more rational than most men at an initial meeting
For all of mens complaints about "screwed up 'chick logic'" it is men who unconciously fall into very irrational behavior when they first meet a woman.

When most man meet an attrractive woman for the first time they act like they're thinking about.........wait for it.....marriage! Holywood bombards us with "love at first sight" stories, but what it really is is "lust at first sight" What kind of message does that way of thinking send to the woman the men have just met who already think she's "the one"? Simple. It sends out the message that the men are desperate. This is the absolute death blow to anyones chances with anyone new. Most women know this. As a rule men don't.

There's an old saying that "A woman has to kiss many frogs to find her handsome prince." I believe that adage is more appropriate for men than it is for women.

4 - What most women say they want and what they actually do want are two very different things.
Look at womens personal ads on some dating sites. Those are the things that women claim they want. If a man actually provided all those things, a man who is sensitive and caring, likes long walks on the beach, likes candlelit dinners, likes cats, enjoys long walks on the beach,, the woman would run for the nearest exit because she is completely bored.

Women want unpredictability. They want to have the anticipation of not knowing what's coming next. Women do not want to be able to pigeonhole the man she's with into any one category. Women want to be just a little off balance and not in total control.

Maybe these things will help all the guys out there who dont have a clue.


These four things are merely what i believe to be true. The last one in particular may offend people especcially any women reading this. That's fine, but do not flame me. Explain why you think that any of what ive just said isn't true.

[uc pseudonym]

These four things are merely what i believe to be true. The last one in particular may offend people especcially any women reading this. That's fine, but do not flame me. Explain why you think that any of what ive just said isn't true.

I have no intention of flaming you, but I will respond. I appreciate that you (and others) include the word "most" and I will presume that you generally mean it for all four of your points. However, I think that as a rule it would be unwise to relate to others based upon anything but the individual.

On point 1 you may be correct in terms of the entire world, but from my own experience the ability to guage feeling is evenly distributed. Most of what you say I can accept in a general sense or agree with, excepting this:

Women want unpredictability. They want to have the anticipation of not knowing what's coming next. Women do not want to be able to pigeonhole the man she's with into any one category. Women want to be just a little off balance and not in total control.

I feel this is far too much of a generalization. Obviously I am not qualified to speak for an entire gender, but many women I know would disagree with this statement (conversely, many would agree). Ultimately, however, I would say that the need for unpredictability occurs in some individuals regardless of gender.

[kryptech]

I grew up enjoying catching frogs in the creek near my house, loved dinosaurs, enjoyed playing with cars (although the way I played with them was different. The big toy cars were the parent cars and the little toy cars were the babies and the little cars drove down the roads together and jumped around and stuff. They talked to each other too. ), and I really enjoy competing in things. Some of those are stereotypically male things.

lol - that is exactly how my sister played with cars when we were little! We're around the same age and so we would play together with a whole bunch of Hot Wheels cars. I was often wanting races (planned very carefully and executed with precision) while my sister thought races were fairly boring and preferred to act out family life amongst the cars. Yes, we had parents, and grandparents, and kids, and family trees. I think 98% of the cars had names (I can still remember a bunch of them). To her it was very drama and relationship based while I opted for good, solid action. It is interesting to think of our difference now when I look back.

[termyt]

I agree with what my fellow men have stated, that not all men are looking for a cheap night...

Of course not. I don't think anyone was saying that we all are. Those making this statement are making a slight error in using stereotypes properly and effectively. When one puts forth a stereo type correctly, which has been done for the most part in the thread, one is not saying "all men behave this way." What one is saying "you can expect men to behave this way." The statements made about how we men act are indeed accurate when you are talking about the entire gender. No one person actually fits the stereotype, but when you take all of us together, we do. We should strive to be less offended by blanket statements. Save your offense for when someone is talking about you directly.

A big reason for commitment phobia among men has to do with intimacy. We all crave intimacy, but males and females tend to achieve it differently. Males achieve it through the physical act of sex. This physical act draws us close to the woman and gives us great pleasure in a way few of us understand. This also allows us to be intimate with more than one person and why, traditionally speaking, having more than one wife was permissible. (Please do not mistake me - thinking one gender is inferior to another is really more of a modern occurrence. I seriously doubt Jacob thought he was superior to either Leah or Rachel – especially not Rachel, whom he loved more.) Women, on the other hand, tend to seek intimacy through security, which is achieved through building relationships. It’s very difficult to build this kind of relationship with more than one person.

Please don’t take this as an avocation for polygamy. It is not anymore then levatical laws concerning the keeping of slaves condones slavery.

[kaji]

I just want to start by saying that generalizations on this level of a species that has as many variables as there are populace is dangerous. By no means should any one assume a man or woman’s personality based on a majority survey.

1 - Women can read emotions far better than men.
A couple walks into a room full of people. The man sees a bunch of people in a room talking in groups of two to five. He will also notice where the food and bar is and notice any exceptionally attractive women in the room. That's it!

His female companion, however, will be able to tell the man which woman is angry, which is lonely, which is jealous, which is upset, which is happy, which feel self-concious, which are confident in themselves and probably which ones are having affairs and with which men. A woman would be able to tell all these things within ten seconds of entering the room.

While at first glance this may appear to be true, I would generally disagree that an ability to read emotions is in question here. Rather it is a difference of motivation. In your example, the man may have little interest in the affairs of others and thus does not take the time to ‘size up’ the room. Instead the man’s goals here are to find friends/ a comfortable place to spend the evening. It may be true that generally men do not have interest in the affairs of others, but this in no way diminishes the ability of the gender to identify emotional characteristics.

At the same time the woman could have easily had the same goals, to identify the groups of people and various areas of the room (including that cute guy on the dance floor).

This ability comes at a price, however,. Women are also far more sensitive to emotional pain. Imagine a man whos skin was so sensitive that every time someone shook his hand in greeting or clapped him on the back in congratulations it felt to him like boiling water had just been thrown on his flesh. Now turn that idea of physical sensitivity to emotional sensitivity and you've got a fundamental difference between men and women.

Generally someone (male or female) who is sensitive to the emotions of others will also be sensitive to their pain. It’s called compassion, and it is not limited to the female gender.

Men seldom, if ever, need to know what the people they're talking to are thinking so they usually experience a womans heightened sensitivity from a negative viewpoint. They hurt their womens feelings without realising it just like the handshake in the previous paragraph and then dont know why the woman is upset with them often for days or weeks at a time for seemingly no reason.

Exactly, its not that a man cannot understand emotions, its that they may at times go into ‘selfish mode’ where they ‘don’t need to know’ what other people think/feel. The person may know that something is wrong, but they are not willing to take the time to discover it. It is not a lack of ability, it’s a lack of motivation, where their own pride may be more important that others emotions.

2 - Men have integrity to their word, however, women have integrity to their feelings
In other words a woman will not do something if it no longer "feels" right. This is due to the heightened sensitivity as explained above. Women base their actions on how they feel at the time, which means that if they've set a date up and it no longer "feels" right they just wont go on the date.

It infuriates most men when a woman "flakes" on them. (Flakinf is a term men use to describe when a woman who has eagerly made plans with them doesnt show up, or calls at the last minute to cancel because her girlfriend needs consoling etc. Generally speaking the probability of a woman flaking is proportional to her options and inversely proportional to her age.

Yes, while I will agree that many woman have a better connection and reliance on their emotions for direction, I would argue that perception plays a far greater roll in this scenario.
Suppose a man had a very good friend who was going through a traumatic divorce (or something of equal pain) and needed comforting, would the man not also call of a date (or other leisurely activity) to provide emotional support for their friends needs? Each person’s perceptions of the options at hand play a great role in any decision at a given time. Which option is more important to that person, which is more trivial? You may never get another opportunity to consol your friend in need, where you will have plenty of time to go on another date.

The need to be true to ones feelings is extrememly powerful for women. Just look at the dominant theme in romance stories. A woman is "swept away" by feelings too powerful to control and has an affair with every man everyone knows she shouldnt.. Another example is the phrase "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned." You see women throwing things at their husbands when they're angry in extreme cases. Can you imagine a man doing this? The idea is ludricous.

Umm, are you saying there are not any abusive husbands? I do not think it is ludicrous, only that a female attacking a male is more socially acceptable then the opposite. Men can easily be swept away by their emotions (have you ever watched a football game?), again a man’s emotional preferences may often differ from that of a woman.

A man will probably do what he has agreed to do.like help someone move for example, because he said he would. However, he wouldnt go through with his plans to help his friend move if it had become a felony with a mandatory 10-year prison sentence to do so would he? Ten years in prison trumps a promise to move furniture. Well, that is the kind of aversion women have when things no longer "feel" right.

I don’t think a woman would either…

3 - Most women are more rational than most men at an initial meeting
For all of mens complaints about "screwed up 'chick logic'" it is men who unconciously fall into very irrational behavior when they first meet a woman.

When most man meet an attrractive woman for the first time they act like they're thinking about.........wait for it.....marriage! Holywood bombards us with "love at first sight" stories, but what it really is is "lust at first sight" What kind of message does that way of thinking send to the woman the men have just met who already think she's "the one"? Simple. It sends out the message that the men are desperate. This is the absolute death blow to anyones chances with anyone new. Most women know this. As a rule men don't.

I don’t know this to be an exclusive habit of the male gender. One would almost think that woman would be more inclined to look ahead to marriage before a man. In reality we should all only date with the intention of finding our spouse. Why would you even date a person that you would not want to spend the rest of your life with?

There's an old saying that "A woman has to kiss many frogs to find her handsome prince." I believe that adage is more appropriate for men than it is for women.

The funny thing about that one is that for every one woman a man dates, a woman has also dated one man. You see, the ratio is still 1 to 1. ^_^

4 - What most women say they want and what they actually do want are two very different things.
Look at womens personal ads on some dating sites. Those are the things that women claim they want. If a man actually provided all those things, a man who is sensitive and caring, likes long walks on the beach, likes candlelit dinners, likes cats, enjoys long walks on the beach,, the woman would run for the nearest exit because she is completely bored.

Women want unpredictability. They want to have the anticipation of not knowing what's coming next. Women do not want to be able to pigeonhole the man she's with into any one category. Women want to be just a little off balance and not in total control.

I think UC already addressed this nicely for me.

-kaji

[TheMelodyMaker]

I'd say that both men and women agree that pointy sticks can hurt. (And that's about all I dare say. ^_^; *runs away* )

[Mave]

*takes a deep breath*

I shall take heed of termyt’s wisdom in approaching this thread for I see no benefit of getting emotional here. Let’s try to help brothers understand sisters and vice versa for God intended both genders to complement each other. At the moment, I can only contribute two points, which I speak from experience.

About moods:
Pls believe me when I say this: The last time hormones hit me, I was lying on the floor in my laboratory with so much pain in my head and below abdomen for at least one hour, wishing to God that I was dead. I almost passed out and vomited. Thank God for pain killers, for I do not know how women of the olden times handled this. I do not support using hormones as an excuse for irrational actions but pls consider the possibility that hormones actually do cause some amount of pain and grief to women in general. I am not trying to invoke pity from anyone, I'm just stating what happens to me.

Girls, when you’re feeling down, uncomfortable and easily irritable for no apparent reason (you know what I mean), just tell your guy what’s going on. You will have a hard time expecting your guy to keep track of your cycles so save yourself the trouble and just notify him, “I’m feeling really crappy today, it’s the time of the month.â€

[termyt]

*in my laboratory*

That's just a really cool thing to say.

I wonder what Mave cooks up in her laboratory.


Thanks for the tips, Mave.

[shooraijin]

St Kevin, corticosteroids (things like prednisone and dexamethasone) are not the same as anabolic steroids (things like testosterone, androstenedione, synthetic androgens, etc.). Corticosteroids are part of the body stress response and are used to modify things such as inflammation, blood sugar and fight/flight state. Overuse of steroids can lead to adrenal suppression/shutdown, osteoporosis, acne, mood changes, gastritis/stomach ulcers, and problems controlling blood sugar up to and including frank diabetes.

[agasfas]

[quote="Mave"]One last thing, agasfas, please consider some of your jokes. I’m having a hard time trying to help you and exclude my feelings. I’m sorry if some girls have hurt you in the past but “Nah, I’m just jokingâ€

[Saint Kevin]

St Kevin, corticosteroids (things like prednisone and dexamethasone) are not the same as anabolic steroids (things like testosterone, androstenedione, synthetic androgens, etc.). Corticosteroids are part of the body stress response and are used to modify things such as inflammation, blood sugar and fight/flight state. Overuse of steroids can lead to adrenal suppression/shutdown, osteoporosis, acne, mood changes, gastritis/stomach ulcers, and problems controlling blood sugar up to and including frank diabetes.

Yeah...I didn't know prednisone was a corticosteroid. I thought it was an anabolic steroid because in my cousin's case it is taken to minimize the muscle loss that comes with muscular dystrophy. Thanks for clearing that up for me, I'll pass along that info.

Also Mave...very well said. Thanks for the frank admission of the power of hormones. I could never put myself into a woman's body long enough to experience what that is like, but I'm glad you are trying to help us guys understand. Very practical advice as well.

[true_noir_chloe]

Well, I've read through these posts on different days, so I can't say I remember everything written. I do agree with all the physiological reasons and know these are facts that are not disputable. Men and women are just plain wired differently. I mean, sheesh don't they look different to you? o_0

Anyways, I was thinking over my sister-in-law and a story that's been passed in our family. She is a great woman and we are probably the closest of my in-laws. Well, she has two boys and two girls and I have one boy and one girl.

She was sure - before children - that if you raised your kids no differently there would be no difference. It was only our social prejudices that we place on children that make them be the way they are. Well, today she will gladly tell you no matter how evenly you raise them they turn out differently. Boys always turn out to be men and girls always turn out to be women.

I can say that from my own experience, my son and daughter definitely show their gender. I mean I have a very tender and compassionate son and a very tomboyish daughter at times, but they are definitely very different in how they handle pressure and life in general. My daughter will always rise to the empathic occasion and my son will always be the "XDXD kill, kill, kill." ^__^;; And, if I compared them with my other friends who have both genders they would wholeheartedly agree. They's just different!

Now Kura, you wrote your list with such confidence I thought you had gotten it from a book and read through the list you wrote hoping to see who came up with these ideas. o_0 Well, thankfully, they were simply your ideas.

[b]1 - Women can read emotions far better than men.

[/b]

I'm not going to write your entire answer and just say there is no way my husband and I walk into a party and I'm that all-knowing and observant and he's totally clueless. That is just so opposite. I lean ADHD and he's like a perfectionist. He always notices everything before me. ^__^;;; After awhile I can probably be more observant of people I've met than him, but before talking to anyone, I doubt I'm going to be all that psychic.

And believe me, I can hurt my husband's feelings much easier sometimes than he can hurt mine. It just depends.

A man will probably do what he has agreed to do.like help someone move for example, because he said he would. However, he wouldnt go through with his plans to help his friend move if it had become a felony with a mandatory 10-year prison sentence to do so would he? Ten years in prison trumps a promise to move furniture. Well, that is the kind of aversion women have when things no longer "feel" right.

Number 2 you kind of got right, since my husband has a lot of integrity, but I have to agree with Kaji 100%, no way a woman would help this person out either. LOL

There's an old saying that "A woman has to kiss many frogs to find her handsome prince." I believe that adage is more appropriate for men than it is for women.

Dang, this is the same for both genders. There is no such thing as love at first sight also. I believe it would be more correct to say, "Attraction at first sight." My husband and I definitely had this, but it took dates and plenty of conversations to fall in love. We had to be around one another and get to know one another first.

You can't just IM someone a few times and fall madly and wildly in love with that person, either. -__-;;

Women want unpredictability. They want to have the anticipation of not knowing what's coming next. Women do not want to be able to pigeonhole the man she's with into any one category. Women want to be just a little off balance and not in total control.

This was never true for me and if it's true for some women, then fine. I think this is what really good movies and anime are made from. But, we don't live in the movies or the animations we love to watch. Real life varies from person to person. Every single person is uniquely different.

Maybe these things will help all the guys out there who dont have a clue.

Not to sound mean, Kura, but I think they would want to go to someone who has a clue. I'm thinking a happily married person like Rev. Doc or Kaji or even little ole' me.

These four things are merely what i believe to be true.

Exactly, these are only your opinions, Kura and I'm sure you feel very strongly with these opinions. I would refer back to Rev. Doc's comments for a more knowledgeable response.

I think it has pretty much been hammered over and over and over that men and women are different. I'm not sure what else anyone could say regarding this.

And, it goes even further that every single person is different and this is the unique way God made us. Praise God, we're all so very different and add to the body in our own unique way. ^___^

[shooraijin]

I thought it was an anabolic steroid because in my cousin's case it is taken to minimize the muscle loss that comes with muscular dystrophy.

What the prednisone is being used for is not to build more muscle, but to prevent the muscle that's there already from being destroyed. This is where prednisone's ability to calm down inflammation and immunity is useful. Unfortunately, many people who have to be on prednisone all the time will have those kinds of side effects, and a lot of them we can't do much about.

[Kura Ookami]

[Quote=True_Noir_Chloe]I'm not going to write your entire answer and just say there is no way my husband and I walk into a party and I'm that all-knowing and observant and he's totally clueless. That is just so opposite. I lean ADHD and he's like a perfectionist. He always notices everything before me. ^__^;;; After awhile I can probably be more observant of people I've met than him, but before talking to anyone, I doubt I'm going to be all that psychic.[/Quote]

I concede that you guys may be right. Perhaps men and women are equally able to read emotions. Reading emotions may be a skill that you can develop instead of something that women are naturally better at than men. I agree with kaji. Motivation is probably a larger factor in this. Men generally dont see a need to develop the skill of reading emotions, therefore they turn out to be less able to read emotions than women who generally practice at it more.

[Quote=Kaji]I will agree that many woman have a better connection and reliance on their emotions for direction[/Quote]

This was my whole point!

[Quote=TNC]Dang, this is the same for both genders. There is no such thing as love at first sight also. I believe it would be more correct to say, "Attraction at first sight." My husband and I definitely had this, but it took dates and plenty of conversations to fall in love. We had to be around one another and get to know one another first.

You can't just IM someone a few times and fall madly and wildly in love with that person, either. -__-;;[/Quote]

I concede that you may again be correct. I was merely stating what i have observed to be true in most cases.

[Quote=TNC]This was never true for me and if it's true for some women, then fine. I think this is what really good movies and anime are made from. But, we don't live in the movies or the animations we love to watch. Real life varies from person to person. Every single person is uniquely different.[/Quote]

On the unpredictability point, it has been my observation that women will generally fall for jerks or random people who they cannot predict all the time. I was merely trying to explain why this is the case.

I mean doing little unexpected things like giving your partner a small card which says "i love you" at an unexpected time when they dont expect you'll do that is a very good example of being unpredictable. Most women will apprieciate that. (and men, but it seems to me that women apprieciate small gifts more than men.) Would that action be nearly as special if you told your partner that you were going to do that at exactly 1pm on thursday before hand assuming they've got a good memory? Id argue that it wouldnt be as special. You guys may disagree.

~ Kura

[Mave]

Thanks, agasfas for your kindness and patience with me! I shall also humbly apologize to any brother I've unintentionally offend in my sharings. Feel free to correct me, for there's always something new for me to learn about our brothers and their ways.

Kura, I have a feeling you and I have different understandings of the term 'unpredictability' judging by the example you gave. I defined unpredictability as something negative, something like a player. Ex: “I wonder whether my guy is going to cheat on me." What you said about the giving of a small card is what I consider a sweet surprise because it's something we don't predict will happen BUT we hope for to happen. Sisters, do correct me if I'm wrong but unpredictability = insecurity in my vocabulary and I can safely say most of my female friends don't want that! I want to feel safe and protected in the arms of a man who I can trust and depend on.

EDIT: I can't respond to your observation as to why women seem to fall in love with jerks. <.< >.> That has never happened to me before. (-__-);

But it seems to me that women apprieciate small gifts more than men.

Scoring on Each Other’s List
I read something in Gary Stone's "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" and agree with it. Imagine men and women keeping scorecards on each other. Women prefer getting small points on a regular basis, while men tend to go with one big bang at one time. Let me try to illustrate this: Women prefer $5 little gift x 10 times of giving while guys prefer going with $50 x 1 time of giving. Theoretically, both equal the same, right? 5 x 10 = 50 x 1

Problem is some women tend to count 50 x 1 = 1. The guy goes off feeling pretty good about himself when all the time, his woman is unhappy because he only scored one point in her scorecard. The guy gets frustrated and wonders why women seem so ungrateful. Perhaps it doesn’t matter how much your gift is but rather how often that counts? Why? I don’t know about other women but I need to hear words of love and encouragement on a regular basis to feel secure in my relationship. My guy most probably feels, “I already said I love you last month. Why do I have to say it again and again and again?â€

[Sam*ron]

*Claps for Mave* Well done!

[termyt]

*takes notes*

Thank you Mave-sensei.

This is good stuff and an example of why and how we should not be ashamed or hessitate to share our expectations with our friends. Don't expect them to just get it. They won't.

This is looked at as mostly a male problem, but I think it goes both ways. It seems like males are the dense ones because we spend more time trying to impress women while women tend to wait to be impressed by a male. That's just a rule of our courtship - guys ask girls. Yes, yes, I know of some great counter examples, too, I'm just saying it's the trend.

[kaji]

*Is impressed with Maves Insight, but not surprised*

In a way we all have our own level or insecurity. We know our significant-other cares for us, but feel the need to have evidence of that. With out these reminders, we become discontent and unhappy.

It reminds me of some of our relationships with our Heavenly Father. We have faith that he loves us, but we will occasionally demand evidence of this. With out a physical reinforcement some people with loose faith, and become discontent in their Christian walk.

-kaji

[kaji]

EDIT: UMMM... DataBase error? I guess it double posted me before I got kicked out...

Sorry.

-kaji

[true_noir_chloe]

*Is impressed with Maves Insight, but not surprised*

Follows suit, and is equally impressed. Mave does act much older than me in so many ways. *hehe* ]WOMEN'S REVENGE
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[font='Courier New']"Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse. "So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked. "No," she replied, " but my husband refused to come shopping with me, so I figured this was the most legal evil thing I could do to him."[/font]

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[font='Courier New'][b]UNDERSTANDING WOMEN [/font]

[font='Courier New'](A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE) [/font]

[font='Courier New']I know I'm not going to understand women. I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax, [/font]

[font='Courier New']pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root, and still be afraid of a spider.[/font]

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[font='Courier New'][size=84][/font]

[font='Courier New'][b]MARRIAGE SEMINAR [/font]

[font='Courier New'][size=84]While attending a Marriage Seminar dealing with communication, Tom and his wife Grace listened to the instructor, "It is essential that husbands and wives know the things that are important to each other." He addressed the man, "Can you describe your wife's favorite flower?" Tom leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and whispered, "It's Pillsbury, isn't it? The rest of the story gets rather ugly, so I'll stop right here. [/size][/font]

[/size][/b][/font][/b][/font]
There were a bunch more, but I'll just place these three which had me laughing. I hope you all like them. ^____^

[jesusfreakabc]

it's mostly their hormones

[Nate]

[quote="Mave"]EDIT: I can't respond to your observation as to why women seem to fall in love with jerks. <.< >.> That has never happened to me before. (-__-)]
I think it's pheremones.

I think jerks give off a certain type of pheremone that attracts women, whereas guys like me, decent, God-fearing folks, don't give off those pheremones.

This is just a theory, though...I'm probably way off base. ^^;;

[Arbre]

On the unpredictability point, it has been my observation that women will generally fall for jerks or random people who they cannot predict all the time. I was merely trying to explain why this is the case.

One of my high school friends got in a relationship kind of like that, but I don't think it was necessarily the unpredictability that drew her to him. I can't speak for her, but it did seem to me like she just honestly loved him. Warning signs and huge personality flaws that are obvious to others aren't always obvious to the person who's head over heels in love and choosing to focus on all the positives. If he likes or loves her, then he can also be a totally different person than when he's hanging out with his drinking buddies or whoever. If she doesn't see him with that group, she's not necessarily learning everything about him.

Plus, it's true that a lot of people generally are mean... of both genders. Guys get hurt in relationships too.

Doesn't dating in general have enough unpredictability? Why add more to it by purposefully choosing someone who's probably going to be unfaithful or dangerous? Maybe a dangerous attitude and the risk involved is attractive to others. For me, it really isnt.

Like Mave said, there is a positive kind of unpredictability. They're those spontaneous actions that at the same time can give a sense of security. Writing notes(or whatever fits. not everyone likes notes), spontaneously giving compliments, getting time to spend together or other actions that show that the guy cares are very comforting.

If there isn't much evidence of that committment, it can feel like it's not there.

[Heart of Sword]

Date Kenshin. ^_^

(Kaoru's lucky... )

[Saint Kevin]

On the unpredictability point, it has been my observation that women will generally fall for jerks or random people who they cannot predict all the time. I was merely trying to explain why this is the case.

Maybe this has to do with mere probably. We are a fallen race...therefore jerks tend to outnumber gentlemen. Therefore the possibility of a woman falling for a jerk rather than the latter is greater. Perhaps it is because jerks also are cocky. Sometimes pride/cockiness is misinterpreted as confidence.

UNDERSTANDING WOMEN
(A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE)

I know I'm not going to understand women. I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax, pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root, and still be afraid of a spider.

Yessss! Those are exactly the kinds of things I will never understand, especially given that spiders are (and should be) more afraid of you than you are of them.

And Mave, I guess I could see how the scorecard thing you mentioned could be true. Don't forget that guys need reassurance too. I personally, think that women can do a lot of little things to boost a guys confidence. One example would be the wife that greets her husband immediately after he comes home from work, as well as seeing him to the door in the morning (The "Hey honey, I'm home" routine). If you've never done this before, a guy might be suspicious that you are up to something or that you are only looking to get your own needs met. Once his is convinced however, that you are doing it because you love him (and believe in him), you might be surprised at the effect it could have.

[Shinja]

Yes!

[faithfighter]

One word to answer you quetion. Yes