This may be a really depressing question. But do you think it's better for someone close to you die without knowing them to well? (such as a parent)
Cause if you knew them, you would look back at the memories, but also be depressed. But if you didn't know them, you wouldn't have memories, and maybe not be as depressed.
Same goes with like, a infant. If they were to die, would you perfer having them die as maybe a 5 year old? SHattering their hopes and dreams? Shattering your hopes and dreams? Having memories of a parent and child of the good times they had? Or better when when you didn't have many memories, where the infant did nothing but eat and sleep. What would be more worse? WHat would be better? I can't come to a conclusion.
In the end, having memories of lost ones is good to have, but also very sad to remember.
I also agree that knowing that they would be at a better place AND having memories would make you happy, yet you'll always miss them...
A really hard question
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Personally, if it was someone close, it might haunt me that I didn't get to know them.
For myself, I would look at the good times and smile. Now it would sadden me if they never accepted Christ. I would never see them again. Does that mean I wish I never knew them? No, I'd still wish to know them.
So yeah, I think the sadder reminder is… never knowing them.
For myself, I would look at the good times and smile. Now it would sadden me if they never accepted Christ. I would never see them again. Does that mean I wish I never knew them? No, I'd still wish to know them.
So yeah, I think the sadder reminder is… never knowing them.
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Link Antilles - Posts: 2528
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- Location: South Carolina
If someone died without me knowing them, I would be more devastated that I didn't know them OR didn't do enough for them. You know, the..."if only I had spend more time....if only I had told them, I wish I had done this for them, maybe I could have made a difference in their lives...etc.etc."
I would have no regrets knowing someone eventhough it make me sad to lose them.
I would have no regrets knowing someone eventhough it make me sad to lose them.
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Mave - Posts: 3662
- Joined: Tue Aug 12, 2003 9:00 am
"'Tis better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all."
Alfred Lord Tennyson
Than never to have loved at all."
Alfred Lord Tennyson
"All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us."
[indent]~~Gandalf, in Fellowship of the Ring[/indent]
[indent]~~Gandalf, in Fellowship of the Ring[/indent]
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EireWolf - Posts: 2496
- Joined: Thu Jun 26, 2003 12:00 pm
- Location: the forests of northern California
Well I have lost both of my grand fathers and I knew one very well and the other one not at all. when the one I did't know died I wasn't very sad and knew I should be. I beat myself up over this and was verry distressed for a week or 2 but then I got over it and basically just forgot about it.
When my other Grand father died I was very sad but at the same time I remembered all the great times i had had with him and was therefor not as distressed as when My other Grand father died.
I think it is better to know someone and have a good relationship with them.
When my other Grand father died I was very sad but at the same time I remembered all the great times i had had with him and was therefor not as distressed as when My other Grand father died.
I think it is better to know someone and have a good relationship with them.
"I concluded from the begining that this would be the end; and I am right, for it is not half over."
-Sir Boyle Roche
-Sir Boyle Roche
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Scribs - Posts: 2722
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I heard a song, I think it was Bebo Norman, that said something like if he died he wasn't leaving but just changing neighborhoods.
I used to be scared about the thought of one of my relatives dying and the song helped me realize that I'm gonna' see them again in heaven again anyway, so there's no use worrying about it--plus they aren't dead anyway. It was actually a phase I was going thru.
But then people I know who aren't Christians, thinking about them dying, it just makes me want to witness to them more 'n stuff.
Well, that doesn't exactly go with what you're asking or saying or whatever, but oh well.
I used to be scared about the thought of one of my relatives dying and the song helped me realize that I'm gonna' see them again in heaven again anyway, so there's no use worrying about it--plus they aren't dead anyway. It was actually a phase I was going thru.
But then people I know who aren't Christians, thinking about them dying, it just makes me want to witness to them more 'n stuff.
Well, that doesn't exactly go with what you're asking or saying or whatever, but oh well.
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone
And so hold on when there is nothing left in you
Except the Will which says to them: 'Hold on!' ...you'll be a Man, my son!
Rudyard Kipling
Satan, bite the dust!
"You are not who your mistakes say you are; you are not the sum of your failures!"---Rev. Billy Miller
Proverbs 18:24
To serve your turn long after they are gone
And so hold on when there is nothing left in you
Except the Will which says to them: 'Hold on!' ...you'll be a Man, my son!
Rudyard Kipling
Satan, bite the dust!
"You are not who your mistakes say you are; you are not the sum of your failures!"---Rev. Billy Miller
Proverbs 18:24
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Ssjjvash - Posts: 1073
- Joined: Sat Aug 07, 2004 3:16 pm
- Location: I abide under the shadow of the Almighty.
I dontI do not think there is much question as to which would be harder emotionally.
Though, I do not think about death very much in general. When God wants to take some one, who am I to disagree, to get upset.
Think about King David. In Second Samuel 15 And Nathan departed to his house. And Jehovah smote the child that Urijah's wife bore to David, and it became very sick. 16 And David besought God for the child; and David fasted, and went in, and lay all night on the earth. 17 And the elders of his house arose, [and went] to him, to raise him up from the earth; but he would not, and he ate no bread with them. 18 And it came to pass on the seventh day, that the child died. And the servants of David feared to tell him that the child was dead; for they said, Behold, while the child was yet alive, we spoke to him, and he would not hearken to our voice; and how shall we say to him, The child is dead? he may do some harm. 19 But David saw that his servants whispered, and David perceived that the child was dead; and David said to his servants, Is the child dead? And they said, He is dead. 20 Then David arose from the earth, and washed, and anointed himself, and changed his clothing, and entered into the house of Jehovah and worshipped; then he came to his own house and required them to set bread before him, and he ate. 21 And his servants said to him, What thing is this which thou hast done? thou didst fast and weep for the child alive; but as soon as the child is dead, thou dost rise and eat bread. 22 And he said, While the child was yet alive, I fasted and wept; for I thought, Who knows? [perhaps] Jehovah will be gracious to me, that the child may live. 23 But now he is dead, why should I fast? can I bring him back again? I shall go to him, but he will not return to me.
I think it would definitely be harder to lose some one that you have made an emotional bond with, but I still think David’s reaction in this chapter is a model of how we should all view the death of loved ones.
-kaji
Though, I do not think about death very much in general. When God wants to take some one, who am I to disagree, to get upset.
Think about King David. In Second Samuel 15 And Nathan departed to his house. And Jehovah smote the child that Urijah's wife bore to David, and it became very sick. 16 And David besought God for the child; and David fasted, and went in, and lay all night on the earth. 17 And the elders of his house arose, [and went] to him, to raise him up from the earth; but he would not, and he ate no bread with them. 18 And it came to pass on the seventh day, that the child died. And the servants of David feared to tell him that the child was dead; for they said, Behold, while the child was yet alive, we spoke to him, and he would not hearken to our voice; and how shall we say to him, The child is dead? he may do some harm. 19 But David saw that his servants whispered, and David perceived that the child was dead; and David said to his servants, Is the child dead? And they said, He is dead. 20 Then David arose from the earth, and washed, and anointed himself, and changed his clothing, and entered into the house of Jehovah and worshipped; then he came to his own house and required them to set bread before him, and he ate. 21 And his servants said to him, What thing is this which thou hast done? thou didst fast and weep for the child alive; but as soon as the child is dead, thou dost rise and eat bread. 22 And he said, While the child was yet alive, I fasted and wept; for I thought, Who knows? [perhaps] Jehovah will be gracious to me, that the child may live. 23 But now he is dead, why should I fast? can I bring him back again? I shall go to him, but he will not return to me.
I think it would definitely be harder to lose some one that you have made an emotional bond with, but I still think David’s reaction in this chapter is a model of how we should all view the death of loved ones.
-kaji
Depend on it. God's work done in God's way will never lack God's supply. He is too wise a God to frustrate His purposes for lack of funds, and He can just as easily supply them ahead of time as afterwards, and He much prefers doing so.
- J. Hudson Taylor
- J. Hudson Taylor
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]I remember that one fateful day when Coach took me aside. I knew what was coming. "You don't have to tell me," I said. "I'm off the team, aren't I?" "Well," said Coach, "you never were really ON the team. You made that uniform you're wearing out of rags and towels, and your helmet is a toy space helmet. You show up at practice and then either steal the ball and make us chase you to get it back, or you try to tackle people at inappropriate times." It was all true what he was saying. And yet, I thought something is brewing inside the head of this Coach. He sees something in me, some kind of raw talent that he can mold. But that's when I felt the handcuffs go on.
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kaji - Posts: 1281
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- Location: Chicago
I agree with everyone else that I would regret not getting to know someone better and spend more time with them if they died before I got a chance to know them. Of course there would be more pain if I knew the person well, but there would also be lots of good memories and (hopefully) comfort in the fact that I will see them again in heaven.
Think about it this way: if you are going to avoid getting to know people just to keep yourself from feeling the pain of loss, you might as well shut yourself up in your house and wait to die. Then you will have the pain of loneliness, which can often be just as great as the pain of loss.
Think about it this way: if you are going to avoid getting to know people just to keep yourself from feeling the pain of loss, you might as well shut yourself up in your house and wait to die. Then you will have the pain of loneliness, which can often be just as great as the pain of loss.
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cbwing0 - Posts: 2728
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Mr. SmartyPants - Posts: 12541
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[i]* the following is m
Last edited by Fsiphskilm on Sun Jan 15, 2017 12:21 am, edited 1 time in total.
I'm leaving CAA perminantly. i've wanted to do this for a long time but I've never gathered the courage to let go.
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Fsiphskilm - Posts: 3853
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- Location: USA
i would rather know 'em. 'cuz i've been in both boats. first my g-pa dies and i didn't know a thing 'bout him. so that was really sad. second my g-ma dies and i knew her well. i know i will see her again, but i get to angcious(spell?) to see her so then i start to cry 
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.[color="DarkOrange"]"The way I see it, every life is a pile of good things and bad things... hey... the good things don't always soften the bad things; but vice-versa the bad things don't necessarily spoil the good things and make them unimportant." -11th Doctor
"The advice I like to give young artists, or really anybody who’ll listen to me, is not to wait around for inspiration. Inspiration is for amateurs; the rest of us just show up and get to work. If you wait around for the clouds to part and a bolt of lightning to strike you in the brain, you are not going to make an awful lot of work. All the best ideas come out of the process; they come out of the work itself. Things occur to you. If you’re sitting around trying to dream up a great art idea, you can sit there a long time before anything happens. But if you just get to work, something will occur to you and something else will occur to you and something else that you reject will push you in another direction. Inspiration is absolutely unnecessary and somehow deceptive. You feel like you need this great idea before you can get down to work, and I find that’s almost never the case." - Chuck Close[/color]
"The advice I like to give young artists, or really anybody who’ll listen to me, is not to wait around for inspiration. Inspiration is for amateurs; the rest of us just show up and get to work. If you wait around for the clouds to part and a bolt of lightning to strike you in the brain, you are not going to make an awful lot of work. All the best ideas come out of the process; they come out of the work itself. Things occur to you. If you’re sitting around trying to dream up a great art idea, you can sit there a long time before anything happens. But if you just get to work, something will occur to you and something else will occur to you and something else that you reject will push you in another direction. Inspiration is absolutely unnecessary and somehow deceptive. You feel like you need this great idea before you can get down to work, and I find that’s almost never the case." - Chuck Close[/color]
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c.t.,girl - Posts: 1428
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- Location: BEHIND YOU.
I would personally like to know them before they died. This is how i see it:
If they died and i didn't know them well (like parent), then you have no memories to perserve about them besides the bad.
If you knew them well you would have more memories to look back on. Though you might have more grieving, at least you have something to hold onto.
Now about the infant. Rather hard question. It would be easier to have the infant die young, but like i said earlier, if you didn't spend time w/ them you have no memories to hold onto b/c the bad. If you got to know them, raise them then you would have memoires to look back/hold on to (kinda like pictures) and remember the good. It would be nice for someone to experence a little bit of the real world before dieing, no matter how short. Every minute of life is precious.
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If they died and i didn't know them well (like parent), then you have no memories to perserve about them besides the bad.
If you knew them well you would have more memories to look back on. Though you might have more grieving, at least you have something to hold onto.
Now about the infant. Rather hard question. It would be easier to have the infant die young, but like i said earlier, if you didn't spend time w/ them you have no memories to hold onto b/c the bad. If you got to know them, raise them then you would have memoires to look back/hold on to (kinda like pictures) and remember the good. It would be nice for someone to experence a little bit of the real world before dieing, no matter how short. Every minute of life is precious.
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agasfas - Posts: 2341
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