Time and hope are running out I don't know what to do but rely on the power of prayer

[Never thirsty!]

I'm struggling with cutting I've been struggling since mid January of this year I've tried getting profession help all that did was add more pills to what I have to already take and those medicines trigger suicidal thoughts so they do more harm than good. I've tried telling everyone I trust my parents, teachers, youth pastor and my best friend none of them know what to do I've tried the books they were a waste of money I tried getting new hobbies and keeping myself occupied but every time I make a mistake it triggers emotions that make me feel like I can't do anything right and then I end up slashing my arm. That's why I'm losing hope I'm losing time because one of my cuts went way too deep and I almost died because I bled out so much praise God I can still function properly. But that wasn't enough to make me stop I tried to get rid of everything I could use but I always ended up finding something new please pray that God can give me strength because I know I can't do this by myself I tried it didn't work out.

[Okami]

Please get help. Seriously. I know it's hard when it doesn't seem like it's helped before. And I'm not saying God won't answer prayers because He will and does... But you need professional help. Yes, the medication can cause suicidal ideation, but that doesn't mean they always will. Therapy and therapeutic techniques do help. So do meds. Please, please, seek help. There's only so much we can do to help you through the internet, and there's only so much prayer can do. God can do all things, the impossible, but with mental illness, we often need to treat it with the work of professionals. Please trust that God has given these people the ability to help you.

EDIT: Just thought of this article and thought it applies, so I'm going to share it.

[Xeno]

You need help. Real, actual help from a real, actual, living breathing human being. Prayer does not correct chemical imbalances or psychological disorders that you may have been born with that are just now surfacing. Testing and treatment are needed. Tell your doctor about what is happening with the new medication you are now on because the dosage may have to be adapted or you may need to be placed on a different medication completely. It is easy to become frustrated, but don't give up. If you honestly want to keep living then that is more than half of the battle.

As far as reading material goes, if you feel doubtful about why you feel the way you do, read this Christians Get Depressed Too by David Murray.

[Mr. SmartyPants]

Do your parents have any health insurance? Because You NEED PROFESSIONAL HELP. If it's of some reassurance towards credibility I'm currently working on my Master's degree in professional counseling. I know you said you sought professional help before but please don't stop from finding help. Seek someone who holds professional counseling credentials, a counseling psychologist, or a licensed clinical social worker. Talking to your doctor is fine but they don't have the training to offer you counseling services. Please find help! Because you CAN get better.

[Makachop^^128]

I'll be praying for you, I'm here if you need someone to talk to. I've gone through some of this and I can say the only thing that helped me was my parents, God and I started taking some natural meds instead of anti depressants. Anyway you should get help and I will be praying for you.