Problems with OCD (Blasphemy)

[MrKrillz0r]

I'm having some real issues with OCD making me commit blasphemy against God. Although through the years I've had other thoughts such as hurting persons close to me, being the cause of terrible accidents and such as well. But these thoughts have always been the overwhelming ones, and I've never understood that the thoughts had to do with a disease until around a week or two ago. Anyway, OCD have been a problem for me at times, and at times it's not a problem at all. Right now though, it's killing me inside. I can feel the extreme anxiety, self hate, guilt just building up and waiting to release. For some reason, my OCD seems to affect me the most when I'm growing a lot in my faith and really coming closer to God, and it becomes really hard to move forward. Yesterday for example, I felt so at peace and I was joyful after church service, and I went home really happy. But a few hours later incredible evil thoughts started haunting me, and my peace of mind turned into full out war.

I'm tired of this and I just want to become free from these chains which binds my mind. I'd be extremely grateful for tips and prayers. I do still believe that even though I am doubting in God to much, fearing eternal sin and all other things, it can be solved by Jesus, but it just feels so incredible hard right now.

I posted this on a OCD forum, but if anyone of you feel like they got time please pray for me to overcome this. For those who do not know what OCD is I copy pasted wikipedia.

"Obsessive–compulsive disorder (OCD) is an anxiety disorder characterized by intrusive thoughts that produce uneasiness, apprehension, fear, or worry, by repetitive behaviors aimed at reducing the associated anxiety, or by a combination of such obsessions and compulsions. Symptoms of the disorder include excessive washing or cleaning; repeated checking; extreme hoarding; preoccupation with sexual, violent or religious thoughts; relationship-related obsessions; aversion to particular numbers; and nervous rituals, such as opening and closing a door a certain number of times before entering or leaving a room"

[Atria35]

Have you ever gone to someone who specializes in treating people with OCD? They know coping mechanisms and can work with you to help you de-stress.

[MrKrillz0r]

No, I have never gone to a person like that. The only person I've really talked with this about IRL is my dad, which has no idea what OCD is. But what he told me was to let Jesus take control of it, if I could not handle it by myself, and it worked very well. But somehow I came back to this. Maybe what I really need prayers about it to learn how to completely and fully trust God's promises.

[K. Ayato]

There's nothing wrong with asking for help from someone who is experienced in helping people struggling with OCD. Yes, ultimately trust in God, but if He puts someone in your path who can help, by all means take it.

[Atria35]

No, I have never gone to a person like that. The only person I've really talked with this about IRL is my dad, which has no idea what OCD is. But what he told me was to let Jesus take control of it, if I could not handle it by myself, and it worked very well. But somehow I came back to this. Maybe what I really need prayers about it to learn how to completely and fully trust God's promises.

OCD has to do with how the brain is wired and the chemistry of the brain. While there are a few things that can be overcome through willpower and trusting in God, OCD is one of the ones that also needs outside help. It doesn't disappear and can manifest in other, more destructive ways.

Mental issues are tricky. Like Ayato said, when there's someone in your path who can help, take it. It might be God sending you a liferaft.

[K. Ayato]

I've read cases of people who have OCD and through outside help can retrain their brains and behavior so that they don't resort to their old habits. Personally, I don't think you'll need medication for this, but someone specialized in behavior therapy who can help you find other ways to break away from the obsessive thoughts is a definite recommendation.

[Atria35]

^ That retraining with help is a solid recommendation right there. Not everything needs medication. But it does mean going to someone who's trained to help with it.

[Xeno]

OCD has to do with how the brain is wired and the chemistry of the brain. While there are a few things that can be overcome through willpower and trusting in God, OCD is one of the ones that also needs outside help. It doesn't disappear and can manifest in other, more destructive ways.

Mental issues are tricky. Like Ayato said, when there's someone in your path who can help, take it. It might be God sending you a liferaft.

Absolutely this. Go see a professional that can help. OCD, as these two ladies have already expressed, can manifest itself in incredibly destructive ways if not treated somehow. I understand its tempting to do the whole "rely only on Jesus" thing, but sometimes it's just not feasible, especially when we know so much about how the brain operates now and why these things happen. Keep your faith, but get help.

[MrKrillz0r]

Maybe you are right, reading what you said reminded me that my grandma used to work in that field. I think I will try to get in touch with her, since she is probably the most spiritual and dedicated person I know, and she got experience dealing with people with mental issues. She doesn't live very far away so it's quite easy for someone who is unemployed like me to get there. I have the feeling that tonight will be one hard night though.

Anyway, thanks for the tips and encouragement guys, I feel stressed out right now but I have hope that I will overcome this.

[QtheQreater]

I'd also advocate seeing a specialist. In the meantime (and the meantime shouldn't be long; make that phone call!), one way I had for dealing with the repetitive or violent thoughts was to stop and pray immediately, then go and do something productive. Also, when I would pray, I didn't just ask for release from the thoughts or constantly ask for forgiveness. I would praise God and thank Him for blessings in my life. It helped me not to keep dwelling the sin I was thinking about; that would just make me feel ashamed and start the self-loathing cycle. Why continue in prayer what you already want to avoid in your thinking?

Anyway, that's just a practical suggestion. I had counseling, and I'm glad I did. Praying for you.