Being nice but harsh

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Being nice but harsh

Postby Dark_angel » Fri May 21, 2004 12:20 pm

:dance: Ok, this new thread is for anyone to give advice on how to be harsh to people in a nice way. :angel: Like when you want to criticize your friend's pictures or writing that is really bad, but really don't want to hurt their feelings. But if you keep encouraging them, when they show it to someone else that doesn't care, they would get hurt. :bootout: and you feel really guilty. :bang: :bang:
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Postby Bunny » Fri May 21, 2004 12:45 pm

LOL. Wow, I think I have the opposite problem sometimes. I would just tell them straight up. Say something like, "You know, I really think you could have done better and here's why..." and just tell them how you think they can improve. Or just tell them that they could use some practice. Or course, end all statements in a smile. :)
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Postby TheSeaAndStars » Fri May 21, 2004 12:53 pm

just tell them that you r trying to give constructive criticism and that it is not ment as an insult of any kind. thats what i usually do along with being as straight forward as possible.
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Postby Danyasaur » Fri May 21, 2004 12:54 pm

heheh;;, well, I really like all art, it's their interpretation of what they feel or think, so I've never had that problem ^.^;; BUT if you really think it's terible, don't tell them that this stinks just try and help them by pointing out somthing about it and try to help them in the areas of the art that's not that great, that's what my mom always does with me, and she's never made me feel bad ^_^
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Postby Madeline » Fri May 21, 2004 12:55 pm

I'm really not sure what I would do. Usually, I just say it's nice, and offer some advice on how they can improve. :)
However, sometimes I feel like quite a hypocrite when I make the same mistakes. :P
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Postby shooraijin » Fri May 21, 2004 1:32 pm

I've found that also making an effort to point out something positive helps, and subtly gets across to them that there were *good* things they did. That way, it's a little easier for them to digest criticism, too.
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Postby cbwing0 » Fri May 21, 2004 3:30 pm

First of all, no one would ever consult me for art criticism. :lol:

I find the best way to give constructive criticism is just to be honest. If they take it the wrong way, just explain that you are just trying to help them improve. After that, it's their problem. :P
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Postby lonelyone » Fri May 21, 2004 4:34 pm

anonymous wrote:heheh. thats what i do, but i do try to find at least one good thing about everyone's art.. if i can't, then they get credit for being confident/brave enough to actually post their art and stuff.. :sweat:





I have taken things the wrong way myself, and then i feel bad at times about it, i wish i didn't have this problem, but i do, i just i could change, maybe with GOD's help i can, one of these days. Maybe somebody out there could give me some very good advice on this issue.
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Postby chibi_chan » Fri May 21, 2004 5:40 pm

I just be honest(but peaple get mad at me for it)it's strange it's like i can't lie to peaple, strange isn't it.
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Postby true_noir_chloe » Fri May 21, 2004 7:38 pm

I would always begin with what is good about their work, because there is always something good in anyone's self-expression of art or writing; all art is subjective. They've spent the time to pour a bit of themselves into their work and that must have something worth complimenting. After I do that, then I tell them I would like to tell them how I think they could improve. That's when I critique - not criticize - critique their work. ^_^

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Postby Golden_Griff » Mon May 24, 2004 7:40 pm

I think honesty is the best policy. Of course it would hurt their feelings if you said "Yikes! That is terrible!" but you could say the same message in a friendlier way: "Hmm, that doesn't appeal to me all that much but I can tell you worked hard on it."
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Postby Golden_Griff » Mon May 24, 2004 7:41 pm

I would always begin with what is good about their work, because there is always something good in anyone's self-expression of art or writing; all art is subjective.


Yeah, in school they teach us to find the strengths first and then give suggestions on how to improve a work of art.
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Postby Dark_angel » Wed May 26, 2004 4:40 pm

anonymous wrote:heheh. thats what i do, but i do try to find at least one good thing about everyone's art.. if i can't, then they get credit for being confident/brave enough to actually post their art and stuff.. :sweat:


right..... you're one to talk, after the ways you torn apart most of my work... and yes, i have new work. :forehead: I just need to find a way to post them, that's all. :dance:
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The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. and knowledge of the Holy One is understanding -provers 9:10




[/indent](Sorting things out, but will be back later.) :angel:
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Postby The Mad Hatter » Wed May 26, 2004 7:59 pm

I'm just painfully honest. if I hate someone, I'll tell them. it gets me some enemies, but, you know, you can't love everyone.


anyway, in your case, it depends a lot on the situation.
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Postby Hitokiri » Wed May 26, 2004 8:01 pm

well..you're not supposed to hate anyone.

I've grown to like everyone, even people that get on my nerves. I've had amny instances where people are in my face screaming and cussing and stuff and raedy to pound me into a pulp.

I will say something like in the lines of "You're a nice guy, you know that. God loves you.". That throws the person of so bad. :lol:

Im th etype of person that rarely loses his temper.
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Postby The Mad Hatter » Wed May 26, 2004 8:24 pm

oh. well, when people get on my nerves, I just tell them god hates them. they know I'm kidding, sometimes.
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Postby Dark_angel » Sun May 30, 2004 1:37 pm

Well, I don't tend to make enemies all that much, if I say I hate someone, it's usually because they're my friends and we're kidding around..^_^

When my friends ask me to critique it, I don't say the bad stuff too much, just the good side, then slowly imply that they need to do better on certain things, unlike someone ::cough cough:: that tend to critique my stuff as much as she can... XD
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The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. and knowledge of the Holy One is understanding -provers 9:10




[/indent](Sorting things out, but will be back later.) :angel:
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Postby Ducky » Sun May 30, 2004 6:44 pm

Yeah, well I don't know much about critiquing art nicely, but my friends sure do because my idea of taking notes in class is doodling and I am not much of an artist so when i proudly ask what they think they have mastered the ummmm... nice... what is it? response. I then explain how my attempt at an apple tree and an archer has to do with communism, capitalism and marxism.

As far as critiquing others I can't say much about art, but if it has to do with writing and the like I can since I can be a bit of a grammar nazi and I revel in picking literature to pieces but I always make sure to compliment the good stuff.
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Postby Dark_angel » Mon May 31, 2004 11:24 pm

anonymous wrote:((When my friends ask me to critique it, I don't say the bad stuff too much, just the good side, then slowly imply that they need to do better on certain things, unlike someone ::cough cough:: that tend to critique my stuff as much as she can... XD))

whaaaaaat?!?! i dont -try- to critique it as much as i can! i'm just brutally honest when i critique art and i tend to notice a lot of details!!(i can notice a lot of details because i have problems with them myself and i try to find good models to draw from..) XD i -do- try to find good points in everybody's work!! and i -did- point out things that you do better than me on!! so you cant blame me!! :P i just critique in a different way from you! i prefer not dodging around the flaws and trying to water down the stuff. i just give it to them straight. so, -sorry- if i offended you! :P

No, of course not, I was just kidding around. :sweat:
you should know, I've said that about a thousand times when I show u my art. It's really helpful, in some ways.....XD Thanks!:hug:
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The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. and knowledge of the Holy One is understanding -provers 9:10




[/indent](Sorting things out, but will be back later.) :angel:
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Postby Asmi-chan » Tue Jun 01, 2004 3:08 am

Critiquing? Well, whenever I came to school with an exceptionally weird hairdo, the comment I got most often was, 'It's nice, but I wouldn't wear it.'

But, as for art, I have a couple friends who love to show me their work and stuff, even though they're not exactly the best artists. Still, I can see improvement in their work as they go along, so I tell them that. Then I point out anything that really sticks out as 'help!' and make suggestions about the littler things, and since I'm technically the art master of my friends, they'll listen to me.

The hardest part about art critiquing is when you have to critique someone who's just a little below your level, at your level, or above your level. Like my elder sister, for instance. She's had about two years more experience than I have, so that can be really hard. :sweat:

The two things I try to go by is that 'Honesty is the best policy,' and 'Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.'
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Postby Dark_angel » Thu Jun 10, 2004 5:13 pm

Asmi-chan wrote:Critiquing? Well, whenever I came to school with an exceptionally weird hairdo, the comment I got most often was, 'It's nice, but I wouldn't wear it.'

But, as for art, I have a couple friends who love to show me their work and stuff, even though they're not exactly the best artists. Still, I can see improvement in their work as they go along, so I tell them that. Then I point out anything that really sticks out as 'help!' and make suggestions about the littler things, and since I'm technically the art master of my friends, they'll listen to me.

The hardest part about art critiquing is when you have to critique someone who's just a little below your level, at your level, or above your level. Like my elder sister, for instance. She's had about two years more experience than I have, so that can be really hard. :sweat:

The two things I try to go by is that 'Honesty is the best policy,' and 'Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.'

You're excatly right! It's nice to see my friends' art get better, I feel really good too when they make a big improvement. ^_^
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The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. and knowledge of the Holy One is understanding -provers 9:10




[/indent](Sorting things out, but will be back later.) :angel:
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Postby Solid Ronin » Thu Jun 10, 2004 7:44 pm

"No offensive ,bro but you suck"

This line never fails me.
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Postby Dark_angel » Sun Jun 27, 2004 4:34 am

Really? wow, I'd expected people to be offended... are the people more friendly where you come from?
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The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. and knowledge of the Holy One is understanding -provers 9:10




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