now getting my butt kicked in the arena of love

[Nightshade X]

honestly, I'm not doing very well. I'm seeing all of these couples wherever I go. In the mall, at church, at school; it just doesn't stop. I can usually ignore something like this, but now it seems like I'm becoming a bit of a pariah because of my extreme shyness toward women. Pathetic, I know, I'm almost 21 and I'm acting like a high school freshman (no offense to all you high school freshmen out there ). It's scary. I see them interacting, especially at church, and I wonder "why isn't that happening to me?" btw, about the church thing, it's always been my dream to be able to worship together, hand-in-hand, with my significant other. call me crazy, but it is.

Anyway, to get back on subject, my cousin comes to visit. I love the guy, but unfortunately he's quite the ladies man. Therefore, it's making me feel a lot worse than I did before. I'm definitely feeling like I'll never really measure up. Probably because of my individualistic ideal (i.e. - I never do anything - dress, speak, act, whatever - just because "everybody" else is doing it).

Ok... I don't really know what I'm asking you to pray for me about, so... just pray what you think I need prayer for.

P.S. - One more thing. I need a job, so please pray that I get one soon.

[shooraijin]

I'll keep both of them in prayer for you.

[Roll]

This is just MHO and may not necessarily apply to you, but it seems like the more one yearns for his or her soulmate, the less ready he/she really is for that person. Loneliness is difficult, but try to make the most of your being single by taking care of the things you'd otherwise have a hard time doing. The more content you are with yourself by yourself, the more prepared you'll be for a serious relationship. I'll pray that God's will be done in your life. = )

[Rogie]

Very insightful, Roll! And I'll pray for you, Nightshade.

[Nightshade X]

Thanks for everything, you guys! I'm feeling loads better.

By the way, Roll, what you said was something I definitely did not want to hear. However... it was exactly what I needed to hear. Thank you. Your words were perfect.