Mature prayer topics (older or mature members only, please)

[Yamamaya]

Imo, young marriages only work out in very small circumstances. But since this is the interwebs, we have no way of knowing your circumstances so I'll just leave it at that.

I'll pray for ya Saphi. Pray and go with what your conscious and mind tells you to.

And ErictheFred, Vikings do not make such gramatical mistakes. As a fellow Viking, I am ashamed.

[animechica]

Thanks you guys...
But, if I can say something confidentially, it's hard to know where to draw the line at what is or isn't "sexual". Because quite honestly, he gets like that if I hug him. Or if we're sitting side-by-side and I put my arms around him. He's said that sometimes it's even happened when he heard my voice on the phone. People always say "If the guy is getting an erection, is that pleasing to God?" but, what happens if the person is hyper-sensitive...? I've asked him about it and he said it's not really "arousal" yet (there have been times when we were kissing and he refused to continue because he was actually feeling aroused) so I dunno. I'm not a guy so I can't judge and everyone's body is a little different. This is a difficult issue to talk about because I know anyone IRL would immediately get the wrong idea... but I hope you guys don't. To me, it's become pretty normal, because he's like.. constantly like that... you know? x_x

@Yamamaya: You're right, it's hard to talk to people online about circumstance-specific issues... but yeah, ideally, I wish I were married (so that sex wouldn't be dirty and I could be fulfilled in the way God intended) but realistically, I don't want to get married for at least another couple of years because I'm not financially ready.

I just wanna make this clear, I'm not going to rush out and get married/move out/whatever before I feel like it's the right time to do those things, so don't worry too much guys ^_^; It's just... I dunno, I just don't want to have to constantly have sex on my mind, and when I'm not desiring it, I'm worrying about it. >_>

[Nate]

If giving a guy an erection is bad then I guess we should boycott cucumber-melon scented candles because they really get me aroused. Not sure why.

What I'm trying to say is "Does it give your boyfriend an erection?" is a really really poor standard for what's acceptable in a relationship.

Other than that I'm not really sure what to say on the issue. Relationships aren't exactly my area of expertise. I just don't think it's a clear issue, especially with how some guys are wired. To me as long as they're not removing clothing anything short of that is probably fine.

[Yamamaya]

If giving a guy an erection is bad then I guess we should boycott cucumber-melon scented candles because they really get me aroused. Not sure why.

What I'm trying to say is "Does it give your boyfriend an erection?" is a really really poor standard for what's acceptable in a relationship.

Other than that I'm not really sure what to say on the issue. Relationships aren't exactly my area of expertise. I just don't think it's a clear issue, especially with how some guys are wired. To me as long as they're not removing clothing anything short of that is probably fine.

Excellent point Nate.

Actually I have different opinions regarding this manner than the standard Christian view but to avoid conflict I'll keep them to myself.

[Tsukuyomi]

Excellent point Nate.

Actually I have different opinions regarding this manner than the standard Christian view but to avoid conflict I'll keep them to myself.

Hmmm, you kind of have me curious now (since you have mentioned it) ^^ PM me if you're too uncomfortable posting here ^^?

Perhaps, the line is where people think of such hugs as being sexual o.O? What one person thinks to be sexual, another may not, so it is confusing at times :-?

P.S. Not saying I think a hug is sexual XDDD;

[Sebastian Michaelis]

Hello everyone I was just seeing how this forum stuff works I am new to it. That and could I get prayer for a problem I have been struggling with. I will elaborate further once someone asks if that’s ok.

[shooraijin]

Not to put too fine a point on it, but the idea in this thread is that it's acceptable to elabourate.

Yamamaya, if you're unsure if your standpoint will go over well publicly, you're welcome to PM it to me and I'll vet it.

[Sebastian Michaelis]

My issue was getting prayer for my addiction to hentai. I came here seeking a more private public place to ask for prayer if that makes any sense. So if you all would pray for me i would greatly appreciate it

[Tsukuyomi]

My issue was getting prayer for my addiction to hentai. I came here seeking a more private public place to ask for prayer if that makes any sense. So if you all would pray for me i would greatly appreciate it

Of course ^^

I hope you're able to find a way to surpass this problem ^__^

You made perfect sense (Only members are permitted to see this section) ^__^

[Sebastian Michaelis]

thanks I know I will somehow and I will do my best to keep progress posted.

[Sebastian Michaelis]

This may sound silly but I have been keeping a chart of how many times I struggle with my addiction in a day and throughout the week. I am not sure if it is good to keep as a reminder of my progress or if it’s bad cause it’s a reminder of something bad Overall I do this in hopes to get at least 1 week were I didn't struggle with my addiction at all and all of your prayers will help me get there ^^ by the grace of god I will get through this. O and please give any feedback you can on this

[Tsukuyomi]

Making a chart can help, but like you said, can be a reminder of said thing you're trying to avoid :-? That can be both good and bad ^^

Good- You're reminded of the icky (couldn't think of a word) feeling after you watch or look at the hentai, and I'm guessing you don't want feel that way anymore, right ^^?

That's another thing you can do, when you get the urge to watch/look at hentai, think of how you're left feeling long after you watch/look the hentai. Does it really make you feel good? If so, I doubt you would be here, so let the not wanting to feel hat way be your motivation to stopping ^^

[Sebastian Michaelis]

^^ thanks for the advice

[MangArtist]

I know I've asked this about a million times, but would you guys be able to be praying for me? I was pretty much clean for over 3 weeks and just ruined it....
So... yeah.. -_-
Thanks.

[Sebastian Michaelis]

I will pray for you

[Riggidig]

I have a complicated dilemna:

I used to be highly addicted to porn. Actually, I used to be highly addicted to masturbation because I learned to do it at a very young age (around 10 years old I think) and over the years I got so addicted to the pleasure it gave me that I moved on to heavier and heavier stuff that could arouse me (it became more and more difficult over the years to find something that could arouse me as I got used to one thing).

A couple of months ago however I just ended up losing interest in it. I was very happy, but recently however I've an "emptiness" in me that needs to be filled. I've found myself trying to go back to porn/masturbation, but the thing is, it doesn't really arouse me anymore. I'll go look at porn, but I won't even get aroused, or I'll try to masturbate (I've actually learned to masturbate throughout the years without having an erection, it's a bit complicated and a bit too graphic for me to explain here) but I'll basically just give up. I'll browse through the late night adult tv programs, seeing if I can find those old feelings that I used to get, but, nothing. Not even a spark.

I've come to realise that it's not really the porn or the masturbation that's my problem, but rather that I'm trying to fill some kind of void in my life by making myself feel good. Porn/masturbation used to do this for me, but during these last couple of months, since those things don't do it anymore for me, I've actually felt MORE empty than usual :-( I pray to God to help me fill this void, but so far nothing has really helped. In all honesty I've actually felt myself moving further AWAY from Him.

I dunno, can you guys give some advice, or pray for me to find something to fulfill this emptiness inside me please?

Thanks

[Reon]

I have a complicated dilemna:

I used to be highly addicted to porn. Actually, I used to be highly addicted to masturbation because I learned to do it at a very young age (around 10 years old I think) and over the years I got so addicted to the pleasure it gave me that I moved on to heavier and heavier stuff that could arouse me (it became more and more difficult over the years to find something that could arouse me as I got used to one thing).

A couple of months ago however I just ended up losing interest in it. I was very happy, but recently however I've an "emptiness" in me that needs to be filled. I've found myself trying to go back to porn/masturbation, but the thing is, it doesn't really arouse me anymore. I'll go look at porn, but I won't even get aroused, or I'll try to masturbate (I've actually learned to masturbate throughout the years without having an erection, it's a bit complicated and a bit too graphic for me to explain here) but I'll basically just give up. I'll browse through the late night adult tv programs, seeing if I can find those old feelings that I used to get, but, nothing. Not even a spark.

I've come to realise that it's not really the porn or the masturbation that's my problem, but rather that I'm trying to fill some kind of void in my life by making myself feel good. Porn/masturbation used to do this for me, but during these last couple of months, since those things don't do it anymore for me, I've actually felt MORE empty than usual :-( I pray to God to help me fill this void, but so far nothing has really helped. In all honesty I've actually felt myself moving further AWAY from Him.

I dunno, can you guys give some advice, or pray for me to find something to fulfill this emptiness inside me please?

Thanks

Hey Riggidig,
In regards to that emptiness I have a few questions. Are you reading your Bible every night? Are you filling up with the very word that is God?

Psalm 1:2 But his delight is in the law of the LORD, and on his law he meditates day and night.
Psalm 119:97 Oh, how I love your law! I meditate on it all day long.

On of my friends told me a guy by the name of Jesse Duplantis said something along the lines of "I don't look for scriptures that appease my flesh, I look for scriptures that convict my flesh and destroy it." (If anyone knows the real/actual quote I'd HIGHLY appreciate it).

There's a peace that only comes from God. To get that peace you have to be seeking out His face, seeking out a personal relationship with Him, seeking out to hear His voice ever clearer. Right now I'm seeking after an anointing as diligently as I can, that God would pour out a blessing on me the same way Jacob sought after Esau's blessing from Isaac and God ended up honoring that.

In regards to the pornography - I'm going to quote from the book "Every Man's Battle" by Arterburn & Stoeker with Yorkey pg. 45

God's Standard from the Bible
Because our own standards on sexual purity have been so mixed with God's, and since many Christians don't read their Bibles very often, many men have no clue about God's standard for sexual purity.
Did you know that we're commanded to avoid sexual impurity in nearly every book of the New Testament? The following is a selection of passages that teach God's concern for our sexual purity. (High-lighted in italics are key words indicating what we're to avoid in the sexual realm):

[SIZE="1"]But I [Jesus] tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. (Matthew 5:28)

For from within, out of men's hearts, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, greed, malice, deceit, lewdness, envy, slander, arrogance and folly. All these evils come from inside and make men "unclean." (Mark 7:21-23)

You are to abstain from...sexual immorality. (Acts 15:29)

So let us put aside the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light. Let us behave decently, as in the daytime, not in orgies and drunkenness, not in sexual immorality and debauchery, not in dissension and jealousy. (Romans 13:12-13)

I am writing you that you must not associate with anyone who calls himself a brother but is sexually immoral or greedy, an idolater or a slanderer, a drunkard or a swindler. With such a man do not even eat. (1 Corinthians 5:11)

The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord. (1 Corinthians 6:13)

Flee from sexual immorality. (1 Corinthians 6:18)

I am afraid that when I come again...I will be grieved over many who have sinned earlier and have not repented of the impurity, sexual sin and debauchery in which they have indulged. (2 Corinthians 12:21)

So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature.... The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immortality, impurity and debauchery. (Galatians 5:16,19)

But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people. nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or course joking, which are out of place. (Ephesians 5:3-4)

Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry. because of these, the wrath of God is coming. (Colossians 3:5-6)

It is God's will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality]impure[/I], but to live a holy life. (1 Thessalonians 4:3-5,7)

See that no one is sexually immoral. (Hebrews 12:16)

Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral. (Hebrews 13:4)

For you have spent enough time in the past doing what pagans choose to do - living in debauchery, lust, drunkenness, orgies, carousing and detestable idolatry. (1 Peter 4:3)

In a similar way, Sodom and Gomorrah and the surrounding towns gave themselves up to sexual immorality and perversion. They serve as an example of those who suffer the punishment of eternal fire. (Jude 7)

Nevertheless, I [Jesus] have a few things against you: You have people there who hold to the teaching of Balaam, who taught Balak to entice the Israelites to sin...by committing sexual immorality. (Revelation 2:14)

Nevertheless, I [Jesus] have this against you: You tolerate that woman Jezebel, who calls herself a prophetess. By her teaching she misleads my servants into sexual immorality. (revelation 2:20)

But the cowardly, the unbelieving, the vile, the murderers, the sexually immoral, those who practice magic arts, the idolaters and all liars - their place will be in the fiery lake of burning sulfur. This is the second death. (Revelation 21:8)[/SIZE]

Isn't that something? More than half of the books in the New Testament are represented here. Drawing from these passages, let's summarize God's standard for sexual purity:

• Sexual immorality begins with the lustful attitudes of our sinful natures. It is rooted in the darkness within us. Therefore sexual immorality, like other sins that enslave unbelievers, will incur God's wrath.
• Our bodies were not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord, who has both created us and called us to live in sexual purity. His will is that every Christian be sexually pure - in his thoughts and his words as well as in his actions.
• Therefore it is holy and honorable to completely avoid sexual immorality-to repent of it, to flee from it, and to put it to death in our lives, as we live by the Spirit. WE've spent enough time living like pagans in passionate lust.
• We should not be in close association with another Christian who persists in sexual immorality.
• If you entice others to sexual immorality (maybe in the backseat or back room), Jesus Himself has something against you!

1 Thessalonians 4:3 the Bible flatly states that this is God's will.
So take His command seriously - FLEE SEXUAL IMMORALITY!

[Tsukuyomi]

Asdfjkl, I was going to post here the other day, but I must've closed the window 8(

I'll be praying for you Riggy ^__^

This may or may not help, but you should try different hobbies you enjoy ^^

[Peanut]

Riggidig, I'll be praying.

[Riggidig]

Tsuki, Peanut: Thank you both for your prayers. I appreciate it.

Reon: Thank you SO much. That must have taken some effort to create. I appreciate it. In regards to your question: No, I don't. I actually haven't read my Bible in quite a while. It seems that whenever it starts to go well with me spiritually I start on a downward spiral. I still remember back in July 2006 when I was born again: For 2 weeks I experienced the most wonderful feelings of joy and peace I have ever felt. Unfortunately it faded with time, and is now only a lingering memory. I would give my right arm if I could have that again, I really would...

[Reon]

Tsuki, Peanut: Thank you both for your prayers. I appreciate it.

Reon: Thank you SO much. That must have taken some effort to create. I appreciate it. In regards to your question: No, I don't. I actually haven't read my Bible in quite a while. It seems that whenever it starts to go well with me spiritually I start on a downward spiral. I still remember back in July 2006 when I was born again: For 2 weeks I experienced the most wonderful feelings of joy and peace I have ever felt. Unfortunately it faded with time, and is now only a lingering memory. I would give my right arm if I could have that again, I really would...

Hey Riggidig - Now you don't have to give your right arm, but you do need to give something if you honestly mean that and want it. I'm going to share something with you that someone shared with me.

How do you spell love?
W. O. R. K.

God calls us to something, something beautiful and amazing. That feeling you felt goes so much deeper. It requires something though, work. Your salvation doesn't require work, that just requires faith. Your going to be a man who's joy of the Lord is His strength. If your not feeding your spirit (watering it) how do you expect it to grow? God wants to be everything to you - the beginning and the end. He wants your sanctification to start with Him and end with Him. He wants you to crave His word more than you want food, more than you want drink, more than what you want for yourself.

How was Christ made perfect? In His sufferings.

The Lord's yolk is easy and His burden is light.

Lets pretend for a moment that emptiness you have right now is exactly where God wants to be. He wants to use that spot to pour love into you and through you to other people and back to Him. The more you allow God to pour into you, the more work you do for that to happen (read your Bible, are a servant to other people) the more the overflow of that will come out. In a sense that emptiness is a lantern, a lantern that needs to be filled with oil on a regular basis to stay lit (on fire). If your not filling your lantern with oil you won't know where your going, you'll be in a dark empty room stumbling around. The more you fill that lantern with oil, are diligent about it, the easier it'll be to find your way around.

One of the things I like to pray for is hunger. God gives me such an appetite for your word, many times one I don't have. Give me such a craving in my heart that all I can see is you. Stir up a fire and a passion in me to love others in the same way you love me, overpower me with that love.

It's very simple:

Keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives. Everyone who seeks, finds. And to everyone who knocks, the door will be opened. [SIZE="1"](Matt 7:7-8 NLT)[/SIZE]

Not just seek anything, not just seek out something temporary to fill that void - seek out something eternal, seek out truth, a foundation that cannot be shaken, open up the book of God, devout yourself to it, die to your flesh, and God WILL reward you. God has set up promises before us, He has given us a hope and a future! A book that is the lamp unto our feet! THE JOY OF THE LORD IS MY STRENGTH! Own that statement!

But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. [SIZE="1"](Matt 6:33 NIV)[/SIZE]

I know I'm giving you such a simple answer. I'm asking you to read your Bible and it might not be something you want to do or anything like that. But let me give a mental picture of what your doing - your spirit is picking up a double-edged sword and literally battling your flesh, cutting away what doesn't need to be there. Your pruning the vine. Your purifying the gold. Like I said, it takes W O R K. Take the effort and God will reward you, for we reap what we sow.

For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow](Heb 4:12 NIV)[/SIZE]

Run the race infront of you - because I promise you, there is a prize at the end. Even the young grow tired... don't give up - RUN

With my utmost love and joy - I pray you receive this right to your heart, that any doubt the devil or your flesh has put into your mind is bound and destroyed in Christ's name and that you pursue reading your Bible. You can start right now. Put complacency aside.

<3 Your brother Ryan - don't think I won't be on your back about this. I expect God's best and His highest in your life. I expect that void to be filled and a light to come upon your life thats so bright - it'll be just like a city on top of a hill, a light on a stand. Amen.


[Edit] I want you to be hungry to fill that void and watch this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_e4zgJXPpI4&feature=player_embedded
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N6J5TzSE_18&feature=player_embedded#
[/Edit]

[danceljoy]

Based on what I read from your posts, I want to contribute to this thread, can I? This thread is abundant of spiritual advices, now I'm gonna mix some scientific/practical ones:

1. Girls, be careful on your perfume, scent can arouse guys bigtime. Don't make it hard for them.

2. Girls and guys, know your body. Girls can be sexual at certain times depending on their period. Yes, it's true, there are times when you are more "horny," know it so you'll avoid temptation.

2. Addiction in general can be a psychological problem. Yes, the Spirit is the best solution to fill the void but what other factors might contribute- availability of material. You have time to play H-games? Have the money? God has many other gifts to appreciate- sports, art, community work. The internet has been too attached to us these past years- look around you, to the real world, try other things. This might sound very idealistic but from experience, enjoyment in other stuff does not come right away. Pingpong killed videogaming in me, and community work took up almost all my anime watching time. But I don't regret it

3. Environment is a big factor. I know that people are more liberal in the US or in Western countries- uphold God's law. The Bible obviously states its laws, but don't sway in to other interpretations easily. Agnosticism(believing in just the general idea of God) is very attractive especially if you're getting tired of following laws.

Remember: Jesus is not taking away fun from us, he's showing us the way to true happiness. Everyday life is full of seduction of worldly pleasures in media, fashion, being cool- do not fall into them and cast Jesus away.

Remember: The laws are not the most important thing but rather, the love you have for Christ to obey them. Work that out first before forcing yourself to obey every law.

4. About the early marriage, just a reminder based on scriptural study: obey marriage laws and gender roles. The man should be the spiritual leader of the family, like a pastor and yes, a woman should submit in his authority. Men and women are equal I know; but a man should love his wife like how Christ loves the church, and a woman should respect her husband. I'm not saying that it should be authoritarian or patriarchal, I don't even know the couple, but: always use the model of Christ and the Church. Feminism is sometimes good, but it destroyed too many families, because it has become synonymous to rebelliousness to many people. Just a warning...

I'll offer some more

[Riggidig]

Based on what I read from your posts, I want to contribute to this thread, can I? This thread is abundant of spiritual advices, now I'm gonna mix some scientific/practical ones:

1. Girls, be careful on your perfume, scent can arouse guys bigtime. Don't make it hard for them.

2. Girls and guys, know your body. Girls can be sexual at certain times depending on their period. Yes, it's true, there are times when you are more "horny," know it so you'll avoid temptation.

2. Addiction in general can be a psychological problem. Yes, the Spirit is the best solution to fill the void but what other factors might contribute- availability of material. You have time to play H-games? Have the money? God has many other gifts to appreciate- sports, art, community work. The internet has been too attached to us these past years- look around you, to the real world, try other things. This might sound very idealistic but from experience, enjoyment in other stuff does not come right away. Pingpong killed videogaming in me, and community work took up almost all my anime watching time. But I don't regret it

3. Environment is a big factor. I know that people are more liberal in the US or in Western countries- uphold God's law. The Bible obviously states its laws, but don't sway in to other interpretations easily. Agnosticism(believing in just the general idea of God) is very attractive especially if you're getting tired of following laws.

Remember: Jesus is not taking away fun from us, he's showing us the way to true happiness. Everyday life is full of seduction of worldly pleasures in media, fashion, being cool- do not fall into them and cast Jesus away.

Remember: The laws are not the most important thing but rather, the love you have for Christ to obey them. Work that out first before forcing yourself to obey every law.

4. About the early marriage, just a reminder based on scriptural study: obey marriage laws and gender roles. The man should be the spiritual leader of the family, like a pastor and yes, a woman should submit in his authority. Men and women are equal I know]always use the model of Christ and the Church.[/B] Feminism is sometimes good, but it destroyed too many families, because it has become synonymous to rebelliousness to many people. Just a warning...

I'll offer some more

Nice post. Thank you for sharing

[Reon]

1. Girls, be careful on your perfume, scent can arouse guys bigtime. Don't make it hard for them.

Scents definitely help stir up guys, I can definitely agree with that. A friend and I back in the day were cruising around Disneyland having fun, a girl and her older sister were infront of us - one of them had the most incredible smelling perfumes I'd ever smelled, to this day I remember that moment because of what she smelled like - as can my friend. It's just a shame we didn't ask her what she wearing (we were young). A lot of times the scent is tied with the thought in our head of girls and even memories, making it easier for our brain to associate that smell even with something physical had something in our past happened (especially before we got saved . . .). I wouldn't stress this point to much, but I do think a girl should be aware of it.

2. Girls and guys, know your body. Girls can be sexual at certain times depending on their period. Yes, it's true, there are times when you are more "horny," know it so you'll avoid temptation.

I know your right in situations I've been in with previous girlfriends, what advice would you put forward regarding that topic. Based of what you typed I can only suspect your saying "girls, when having your period do your best to avoid physical confrontation or moments where it could easily shift that way" - What advice would you give for guys? Or even how they would approach that topic with a girlfriend.

3. Addiction in general can be a psychological problem. Yes, the Spirit is the best solution to fill the void but what other factors might contribute- availability of material. You have time to play H-games? Have the money? God has many other gifts to appreciate- sports, art, community work. The internet has been too attached to us these past years- look around you, to the real world, try other things. This might sound very idealistic but from experience, enjoyment in other stuff does not come right away. Pingpong killed videogaming in me, and community work took up almost all my anime watching time. But I don't regret it

It's very interesting that you brought up that point. I used to have an addiction to gaming. I spent the majority of my time outside of school, hanging out with friends, watching tv, and playing video games. I would constantly find myself bored out of my mind when not doing one of those, when now after quitting video games, watching under an hour of tv a week (not including youtube), I've in the past nine months not found myself bored once.


Really liked reading everything else you had to say and on the basis of the Bible would agree. Thanks for taking the time to share with the community.


--------------------
In addition to my previous post and the topic it regards - I came across this verse today:

[color="DeepSkyBlue"]Do not this Book of the Law depart from your mouth][/color]
Joshua 1:8

It's very clear on what we need to do. I'd like to follow that verse with this one:
[B]
[color="DeepSkyBlue"]Let us therefore fear, lest, a promise being left us of entering into his rest, any of you should seem to come short of it. [/color]
Hebrews 4:1 KJV
--------------------------

[K. Ayato]

The bit about girls during their monthly cycle is very subjective. Being a girl myself, I personally start feeling a rush of those hormones up to a week before it actually happens. During it, I'm unusually moody or irritable. Sex is usually the farthest thing on my mind then, but I do long for physical closeness with a guy, just not THAT close .

In regards to avoiding those areas where the hormones could drive a girl in that direction towards sex, well, basically it's best to avoid being alone with a guy in a time and/or place where good judgment is hampered. Again, those scenarios are subjective. Some girls can handle those areas (e.g. darkened alleys or being alone in the car) better than others. What is most important is that you learn to exercise good judgment and self-control.

[Riggidig]

I agree with Ayato. I have a good idea where my weak spots are (and I don't mean physically). As a general rule of thumb I wouldn't recommend spending ANY time alone with someone you find even REMOTELY attractive if you get easily aroused and/or can't control your urges, because you never know just how much willpower the other person has and it could potentially lead to a situation where both of you end up doing something you'll regret later (I'm still a virgin myself, but have gone further than I would have liked to in the past with certain girls I dated, mostly because of bad judgement and not being able to control my urges).

A while back I made a promise to myself NOT to get involved in any kind of relationship because it seems to go down the wrong path every single time. I prayed to God to send me the right person at the right time, when HE thinks I'm ready, whether that's this year, next year, 5 years from now, or even 10 years from now. I'm just tired of going through the pain every time from messing up a relationship.

[danceljoy]

Based of what you typed I can only suspect your saying "girls, when having your period do your best to avoid physical confrontation or moments where it could easily shift that way" - What advice would you give for guys? Or even how they would approach that topic with a girlfriend.

It actually depends on every girl. Asking them would not be a good idea because many don't know their cycles. So I can say that my warning is more leaned on girls; personally, 1-2 weeks after my period is my "temptation prone time." I don't have a boyfriend but I have the internet so there you go.

Just as the other post say: avoid secluded places where you can do anything without being seen. In a book, I have read a testimonial before where a model couple in the church, about to be married in a year, committed premarital sex resulting in pregnancy. Everyone was shocked in the church.

I remember what they said: it started with holding hands, cuddling, then kissing, then one thing led to another. In their case, they mentioned that the guy teased the girl to a point where she became daring and forget about what could happen.

This can be a major cultural difference, I'm not really sure, but its a good practice for the guy to spend time with the girl's family or per say, hang around the girl's house (if family members are present). It's a strict tradition in our family and other Filipino. Of course, I'm not saying this is applicable to you all, but it has many safety benefits

[Reon]

I agree with Ayato. I have a good idea where my weak spots are (and I don't mean physically). As a general rule of thumb I wouldn't recommend spending ANY time alone with someone you find even REMOTELY attractive if you get easily aroused and/or can't control your urges, because you never know just how much willpower the other person has and it could potentially lead to a situation where both of you end up doing something you'll regret later (I'm still a virgin myself, but have gone further than I would have liked to in the past with certain girls I dated, mostly because of bad judgement and not being able to control my urges).

A while back I made a promise to myself NOT to get involved in any kind of relationship because it seems to go down the wrong path every single time. I prayed to God to send me the right person at the right time, when HE thinks I'm ready, whether that's this year, next year, 5 years from now, or even 10 years from now. I'm just tired of going through the pain every time from messing up a relationship.

Nicely said - I deal with this as a guy and have had thoughts like this. The part on "because you never know just how much willpower the other person has" was a huge reminder for me. I'm usually careful to stay in public settings but sometimes one crack in the armor is all it takes. The values I'm currently seeking out in a girl are a standard that I think will lead to good results in regards to that area - I want a girl who's so focused on God's will that she'd break up with me in a second if I went to far. Not a girl who would get comfortable with me and then change her mind - I'm seeking after a girl who knows who she is, because she knows who her God is.

I think your prayer is spot on Riggidig - When God thinks your ready. The fact your willing to wait on God's timing is something that will benefit you immensely as if you look throughout the Bible multiple people had to wait for God's promise to take effect, His timing and not theirs - so your promise to yourself is honorable and I completely respect it. I would like to add that I think God will also reward you for the work you take now in preparation for a future wife. When your ready in God's eyes for more responsibility in a sense - won't He honor that? =) He really looks at the desires of our heart and the motives behind them.

One thing I'd like to work on ... (because sometimes I think I also have a potential fear that I would become comfortable in my next relationship, even idolize that person, is like yours - it going down the wrong path like my last relationship and causing pain) ... is a list of Biblical qualities God wants us to have - when I see a person with those qualities (not perfected obviously but has them) - I will definitely starting seeking God in regards to it lol.

[Sebastian Michaelis]

I posted here before, And I have done an ok job of staying clean from my past addiction to hentai with some up's and down periods slipping up from time to time but so far good. would you all pray that i totally stay off anything that is remotely un pure or similar to it x.x . Also that i regain a sense of happiness because lately i been feeling horrible for no real reason just so depressed inside and beating myself up over something I am not even doing with such negative thoughts about myself and random stuff i just need some peace of mind. Thank you all for reading this and please pray for me.

I feel with the Lord i can get passed this hard time in my life and with all of your prayers i will make it through.

[Riggidig]

Hey Silent. I'm in the same boat as you regarding everything you mentioned in your post, so I can relate pretty well. I'll throw out a prayer for the both of us :-)