Poetry...at least my attempt at it ^_^

[Kunoichi]

Ok..first one!

Healing Wounds

When the voices scream at me
"Die" they say for all they wish
is to separate me from His Holiness.

"Be Free" they mock the One who came
Asking me to reach for the blade
And yet my soul cries in protest

The Holy One reaches down his hands
blood soaked from the nails
giving me life renewed once more

For he alone saves me from this darkness
He alone is there to dry my tears
And so to him I embrace

Be Free I say to the voices from the dark
Then awa;y with you and throw the knife
Gripping my Saviors nail scarred hands

[SnoringFrog]

I really like this piece, but the 3rd stanza sounds jsut a tad off. The first two lines are great, but the third one doesn't seem to flow w/ them very well. I think it's partialy because the first two lines seem to be better suited to be followed by another set of two lines as well.

[Kunoichi]

Hai!! I will edit Snoring Frog *bows ThankyoU ^_^

[Kunoichi]

Broken stones
left untruned
upon a well worn path
they appear to be so fragile
so small in comparison
to their brothers of large stones
and yet these small cmoptct dusts
can withstand the strongest storm
turning into concrete even with
the trialed times
so truly which is stronger
the ones that are together
or the ones who depend
soley on their own?

***

THis poem was in observance of how it is so hard for me to stay with people because I get afraid but I wrote this to remind myself that even through trials, I can ask people and the Lord for help to make me stronger.

[SnoringFrog]

Very interesting, and well done. Something seems "wrong" with the flow, but that doesn't seem to hurt the poem at all, so I'm not sure why I'm thinking that, maybe it's just a different flow than I'm used to that I seeing, idk. Still good work though, save for:

and yet these small cmoptct dusts

And I'm not a fan of the use of the word dusts here, not sure why, just seems...odd, I suppose would be the word? Nothing big enough to warrant changing it for my opinion though.

[Kunoichi]

The poems rhthym is off considerably, kinda have to get back into the groove of my poetry...been a while and been through some shattering times, that praise God are now over.

[SnoringFrog]

I know the feeling of trying to get back into poetry after a long hiatus, it's no walk in the park, that's for sure. And as for hard times, I'm glad to hear they cleared up, and if you can, anytime which makes emotions of any sort run high can be very useful in writing, I know the times I get depressed are the times I can put out the most poetry.

[Anna Mae]

In "Healing Wounds" I like your juxtaposition of wounding yourself with Christ's wounds.

And yes, there are some typos that could be fixed.

[Kunoichi]

The new day approaches
Fast as the tidal wave
Looking upon it with fear and awe
Will we even be able to survive?

Stones and arrows pierce the skin
Just another day
We sound the trumpet
The battle has begun

Through all the trials and strife
For there are much in this Game
We can look to one source
Who withstand all when He came

The difference that is between Him and I
Is that never failed
He faced his trials head on
With the power of a general

This great Commander
This great King
Gave all that he could give
Upon that cross on Calvary

And yet we sit here and gripe
Afraid to leave our doors
Even when we have
All we need to battle on

So take heart
Do not be afraid
Of a tidal wave or war
For God is here
And He says, “I’ll love you forevermore.â€

[Anna Mae]

The new day approaches
Fast as the tidal wave interesting word choice (the). Also, I recommend punctuation just to make the poem flow more smoothly; otherwise the reader might take it that the tidal wave is looking upon the new day (unless that was intentional).
Looking upon it with fear and awe
Will we even be able to survive? I like the simile.

Stones and arrows pierce the skin
Just another day
We sound the trumpet
The battle has begun

Through all the trials and strife Was this intended to be a reference to the John McCutcheon song?
For there are much in this Game
We can look to one source
Who withstand all when He came

The difference that is between Him and I
Is that never failed
He faced his trials head on
With the power of a general I grasp your meaning in this stanza, but it could be worded more clearly, particularly the first and second line.

This great Commander
This great King
Gave all that he could give
Upon that cross on Calvary

And yet we sit here and gripe
Afraid to leave our doors
Even when we have
All we need to battle on

So take heart
Do not be afraid
Of a tidal wave or war
For God is here
And He says, “I’ll love you forevermore.” It's interesting how you mix your figurative language. Good message.

[Kunoichi]

In fear I sit and tremble
The chains of yesterday
take me by the hand,
unforgiving waves
of pain and shame


I look to the heavens
hearing nothing from above.
screaming out to God
"Father, where art thou's Love?"

So I sit and wait
praying for the day
when Death's door will come knocking
to where I will leave this battleground

And yet the day has not come
though it will some day
will I be ready to see my Savior
or will I cower in shame

For God so loved the world,
that he sent his only son
to save a sinner just like me
and I'm not the only one

There are days that I feel
unworthy of his name
but it doesn't matter what I think
because he has come to save

***
going through a hard time so writing this helps