The Letter

[PolarHeat]

Hey!

OK, I admit, this feels a little geeky.
I mean, how many guys write a letter to the girl that they’ll marry someday—even before they meet the girl?
Probably not too many! But the world is a weird place, so even though we haven’t met yet, I thought you might need a little encouragement.
To answer the first question you may be wondering about me, the answer is yes. I’m definitely keeping myself sexually pure. I do this partly for God and partly for you.
I figure if I’m going to ask you to marry me someday, you must be pretty special—so special that you’re worth waiting for. Yeah, I know, plenty of guys have given in to temptation and found a girl who’s willing to have sex with them. And I have to admit. . . I’ve felt that temptation, too. But I’m not giving in! Like I said, you’re worth waiting for. Besides, I’m wouldn’t want a memory from some shallow sexual encounter with another girl making me feel guilty on our wedding night.
How about you? Are you still saving yourself for me? I notice some of the girls in my youth group wear purity rings, and that’s cool. I’m proud of them even though none of them are quite right for me. But whether you wear the ring or not, I hope you’re staying pure for God and me. I mean, who would want an apple after several other people have taken a bite out of it? In the same way, my ideal girl isn’t one who some other guy (or worse—guys) has already taken to bed. So I hope you’re waiting like I am.
Hey, don’t think that you shouldn’t have fun and get to know other guys before me. Truth is, I want you to spend time talking to a variety of guys. (That’s how you’ll know I’m better that all those other dudes when we finally meet!) But I wanted to give you a heads-up; Lots of guys out there pretend to be guys like me. Don’t let them fool you. If they try to get intimate before marriage, they’ve just tipped their hand. Dump’em!
As land as I’m writing from the heart, can I mention something that’s bugging me? It’s about clothes. Non-Christian guys love it when girls show off their bodies. You know what I mean: short shorts and skirts, bare stomachs, skimpy tops. Some fashions might not show skin, but they’re so tight they might as well be painted on. They reveal every curve and encourage superficial jerks to think lustful thoughts about the girls wearing them.
I don’t’ write this to complain. I just want to encourage you to set a higher standard. It would kill me to finally find you—and then to see you wearing stuff designed to glue other guys’ eyes to your body.
Sure, I know what some girls say: “To catch a guy these days, this is the kind of bait we need.â€

[Danderson]

Man, my jaw just dropped reading all of that....(obviously in a good way)....this guy baisically described what should be every Christians way of thinking when it comes to relationships....that was just....wow....

[Nia-chan]

I've never been around other Christian guys that much so at first it seemed a little corny , but that is a good message to get across to a potential Christian wife... or any wife in general

[Alexander]

I'm not surprised to be honest. It's something that should be standard among both genders. I myself have the same view point as him.

But at the same time, to receive a personal message like that before you even met him well, that's really amazing and very honorable of him to do. If I were a girl, and well, actually. Speaking as a boy, I would feel greatly reassured if a girl sent me something like that too if we hadn't met for the first time.

[AsianBlossom]

Wow...that is soooo cool and sweet. I'd love it if my future husband wrote me something like that.

*ponders writing one herself*

[Nate]

I don't waste my time writing letters to people who don't exist.

I learned my lesson about this when I tried writing Optimus Prime.

[Auh_Rin_Yaang]

It feels soo good to read this again, cause I also read this on Brio too (it really touched me too that some guy would actually write something like this) It would be sooo sweet if my future husband had written something like this before we met but more than that, I also think everyone, boys and girls should think this way about relationships too.

And like PolarHeat said, it showed me (again) that there still are guys out there that have a straight head. I mean, I knew there were guys like that before, but it reminds they are reallly out there somewhere... just can't wait to meet the one for me!~ In God's time, of course, patiently.

[AsianBlossom]

I don't waste my time writing letters to people who don't exist.

I learned my lesson about this when I tried writing Optimus Prime.

Yeah, but Optimus Prime is a fictional character. The one you're meant to marry (if there is one) isn't. *puts up insult-shield*

[Puguni]

D: I'm kind of hesitant about the clothes thing though. I like wearing tank tops time to time. I mean, I don't go out of my way to lure boys with my scandalous wardrobe, but some of my sundresses reveal more than usual, like, my back or a low neckline. :C

It is sweet though and inspiring.

[Mr. SmartyPants]

In all honesty, parts of that letter were a tiny bit cheesy. Nonetheless, I think the entire idea behind it all is a good one.

[Dai-go]

Wow. We're not a dying breed like I thought! XD!
Rejoice! The true good guys are still around!
lol.

[Nate]

[color="Black"]Yeah, but Optimus Prime is a fictional character. The one you're meant to marry (if there is one) isn't. *puts up insult-shield*[/color]

I'd say the fact that no woman would ever marry me means that my future wife is indeed a fictional character. XD

Also, you're a fictional character. So there.

*bounces off insult shield*

Curse you, insult shield! *shakes fist*

[Raiden no Kishi]

Your MOM's a fictional character!

That said, I do like the letter, and I'm not so sure it was meant to literally be a letter to someone, just a different way of stating their heart on this issue.

.rai//

[LadyRushia]

Cute letter! ^_^ Even though I've heard all of this before it's nice to know that there are guys out there who have made this commitment. I've said to my friends before, "Yeah, my husband's gonna be a virgin." and they were like "Ha! Good luck finding that one!"

It's good to remember that there are guys like this because so many times it feels like they're all just shallow creatures. :3

Hee, I'm one of those girls with a purity ring! ^_^ It says "True Love Waits" and I never take it off except when I shower.

Man, I wish I knew more guys like the one who wrote this letter in real life.

[Yeshua-Knight]

hmmmm, i think i remember hearing about this or reading it somewhere similar

in any case, i have to agree that it's an encouragement to me to think that there are others who are trying in earnest to hold to a higher standard of living

and one last thing, when one of your friends mocks you for holding out and says things like "good luck finding that one" just remind them that the most precious treasures are the rarest and hardest ones to find, this is how i think of my future wife

[LadyRushia]

Yeah, it doesn't really bother me anymore when people say things like that. Sometimes I think about how wonderful my future husband is gonna be and then I'm like "Darn, I haven't met him yet." XP

'Tis all on God's time ^_~

[ShiroiHikari]

Dressing like a skank is one thing, but what's wrong with wearing clothes that flatter your figure...?

[LadyRushia]

Dressing like a skank is one thing, but what's wrong with wearing clothes that flatter your figure...?

I don't find anything wrong with that. If your clothes flatter you without revealing too much, then it should be fine. I think it becomes a problem when clothes are excessively short, tight, or thin and there are ways to fix those problems. Like, if you have a shirt that's a bit too short but you absolutely love it you can go to the store and buy a cheap matching shirt to wear underneath and it won't look bad at all.

I love fitted shirts; I wear them all the time and many of them really flatter my figure, but they're not so tight that I can't breathe. Point is, you can still wear regular clothes without causing your brothers in Christ to stumble. ^_^

[Arbre]

I think it's an interesting idea.

I attempted that kind of thing when I was younger. I couldn't finish. I eventually took the lazy way out and just made lists of all the qualities I wanted in a husband. xD

Really, though, I think that you'll change opinions and personality so much before you marry, that the letter will eventually seem a bit outdated. If nothing else, you'll have new perspectives to add.

That's not a bad thing.

If for no other reason, I think it would be good to keep your letter, just like a journal entry. When you look back at it years later, you can see how you've changed/stayed the same and how that girl fits into your dynamic life.

[AsianBlossom]

I'd say the fact that no woman would ever marry me means that my future wife is indeed a fictional character. XD

And why do you think that? If God meant for you to get married, your future wife is out there]Also, you're a fictional character. So there.[/QUOTE]

Ha ha haaa...to you, maybe.

*bounces off insult shield*

Curse you, insult shield! *shakes fist*

*grins* It's amazing what you'll come up with on other forums, isn't it? Though you're the first that's ever said anything about or interacted with my insult-shield...

[Yeshua-Knight]

pardon me for taking this slightly off topic, but if one person says that they're future spouse is a fictional character, and then proceed to tell a person of the opposite gender that they themself are a fictional character, then couldn't one apply a bit of logic here and make the conjecture that perhaps the person the same person you just called a fictional character is your future spouse?

anways, that's just my take on it

i am confident that the Lord will provide to each of us those things that he has created in us the desire to have, whether it be a spouse, a strong relationship with Him, or whatever it may be.

[Nate]

[color="Black"]And why do you think that? If God meant for you to get married, your future wife is out there]

There is a reason I think that, but this is not the time or the place to be self-deprecating, so I shall refrain from answering. XD

[color="Black"]*grins* It's amazing what you'll come up with on other forums, isn't it? Though you're the first that's ever said anything about or interacted with my insult-shield...[/color]

That's because everyone else is lame.

*bounces off insult shield*

Hey, I'm insulting OTHER people, not her! Geez, it must not be a very good model, it's about as smart as me.

*bounces off insult shield*

I was insulting MYSELF, not her! Stupid insult shield.

*bounces off insult shield, smacking me*

Ow. ._.

[color="Black"]if one person says that they're future spouse is a fictional character, and then proceed to tell a person of the opposite gender that they themself are a fictional character, then couldn't one apply a bit of logic here and make the conjecture that perhaps the person the same person you just called a fictional character is your future spouse?[/color]

Shut up with your logic! That's not what I meant and you know it! XD;;

[Themanofchrist]

I made this commitment a long time ago tho my friend keeps telling me that you need to get laid so you are experianced when you are married

[Yeshua-Knight]

not meaning to step on any toes, just thought i'd point that out for future reference is all...

*quietly walks away since he has no money to afford an insult shield*

[Alexander]

I made this commitment a long time ago tho my friend keeps telling me that you need to get laid so you are experianced when you are married

*hugs*

You know, I think boys get just as much bad advice as girls do. You don't want to know the amount of times girls have said that to me. *shudders*

[Themanofchrist]

*hugs*

You know, I think boys get just as much bad advice as girls do. You don't want to know the amount of times girls have said that to me. *shudders*

So very true my bro in christ:poke:

[Yeshua-Knight]

here's my take on that aspect, if both the man and the woman are virgins, then they have no way of comparing, so it doesn't matter who's "experienced" or not