RedMage wrote:They either don't really grasp the effect wearing stuff like that has on their Christian brothers and guys in general, or if they do have some idea they don't feel that they should have to change what their wear based on guys' weaknesses
I'm going to chime in here. I've hammered the responsibility guys have on numerous occasions. This is, however, a two-way street. Today's lesson is, "Girls: You can help your brothers in Christ become real men of God - and you can do it today with very little effort."
Given the way the male mind is wired, it's nearly impossible for most guys who have grown up in a modest household and environment to "not look" AND feel comfortable around women in these kinds of suits. Let's face it, the media is CONSTANTLY bombarding guys with images of women in skimpy clothing - and every time it's got one purpose: arousal. When was the last time you saw a woman in skimpy clothes in a print add that wasn't "inviting?"
You don't even have to stand up to see it. Just google for anything. Let's google for "new car" right now. I clicked every link on the first page, and at least three of them had adds embedded in the page that featured low-cut shirts on perfectly fit women - all of which were smiling with a little, "wanna ride?" smirk. I'm not saying these adds are "slutty." I'm saying that, when the media uses skin, it tends to use it in ways that promotes a certain feeling.
Now then. Let's say an average guy goes to a pool party at a youth group event. He's just come out of the media rich environment that promotes skin and this feeling. What's the first thing he's going to notice when he walks into the back yard where everyone is? Are the Christian girls there going to be helping him become a mature man of God? Are they going to help him see that women are HUMAN beings - with feelings, desires and hurts? This could very well be the day the light bulb of realization go off, and the young man has the epiphany that, "Yes! These women are God's creations! They deserve to be treated with every respect!"
Avoiding the complete awkwardness of the whole situation (and the segue, for that matter), let's talk about love.
Jesus went out of his way on multiple occasions to tell us to "love each other." A very wise man once defined love as a DOING not as a FEELING. The way to love someone is to do what's best for them, even if it's difficult.
I point this out because my HS sunday school class cannot grasp this fact, and it really worries me. I love those kids a lot, and I die a little bit each time I hear them tell me, "but that's not MY problem." I would like to repeat what Red Mage said here in my own words, and HOPE this clicks for someone out there. Heck, maybe even one of the girls in my HS class reads this. Stranger things have happened, I guess...
Do not buy into the world's hype that you DESERVE everything. Jesus died on the cross because we DESERVE death. We have been GIVEN life. It's a gift. THAT is the point of grace: unmerited favor!
It's entirely possible that the largest threat to the morals of our society (and more specifically the future of Christianity in America) can be boiled down to the media mantra, "I deserve better than this." Want a couple of examples?
If you are in a relationship and your partner isn't perfect, you immediately start thinking, "I deserve better than this." A couple I know got a divorce, and it was obvious (to me) that it was inevitable. One day the wife was complaining about the husbands snoring and I asked her about wearing ear plugs. "I shouldn't have to," she replied. "It's HIS problem."
Have you ever been upset with your parents because they got you a gift that wasn't the RIGHT one? Maybe an MP3 player that
wasn't the cool iPod that all your friends have? Perhaps they gave you a car, but it wasn't the one you wanted. Obviously you DESERVED the right one - and THEY blew it!
How about this one... "I really like this swimsuit," said the 17 year old girl. "It's too revealing," said her mother. "It will be too much for the boys to see that." "That's not MY problem," said the well-meaning girl. "THEY'RE the ones with the lust problem."
I think this is basically what Red Mage is getting at above, and I think it's worth repeating a hundred times.
Yes laddies, your Christian brothers struggle with this. Does this mean you can blow it off as "their problem?" Hell no! Human beings are capable of adapting to nearly any environment - don't tell me "it's too hard." This is a cop out and the tell-tale signs that you've totally bought into the victimist culture that shirks responsibility and the sensationalist media that casts the victim as "brave" for talking about other people's problems.
I dunno. I seem to be rambling. Perhaps the best way to figure out which camp you are in is to ask yourself this: Are you more upset I said "hell no" in the previous paragraph, or about the real problem at hand. I'm just asking... Now if you'll excuse me, I have some pop-up adds to delete. I really shouldn't search Google for cars; that's just begging for trouble.