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relationship advice

Postby Guardianking500 » Thu Jan 25, 2007 10:16 am

so my girlfriends mom wants us to break up for some reason I dont know. but is there really a good reason for us to break up. i mean we both believe in god and he comes first in our relationship. we love each other and hoped to get married in the future. but her mom is putting pressure on her to break it off with me.

should we break up just because her mom wants us apart?

i would really like your imput.

please reply.
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Postby Azier the Swordsman » Thu Jan 25, 2007 10:22 am

It isn't up to her to run your lives for you. Allthough it wouldn't hurt to question more deeply the exact reason she doesn't want you two together, I wouldn't pay her much heed unless there is an explicity darn good reason for the breakup.
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Postby mitsuki lover » Thu Jan 25, 2007 11:40 am

The three of you should sit down with your Pastor or Priest and have him listen to both sides of the story.Perhaps a neutral third party perspective is what both sides need in this case.
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Postby Mr. SmartyPants » Thu Jan 25, 2007 11:51 am

Just because two people both love God and have him first in their lives does not mean someone is automatically compatible with another person.

Likewise, I would strongly advise into considering what Aizer the Swordsman has said.
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Postby K. Ayato » Thu Jan 25, 2007 11:53 am

Speaking from experience here. She probably wants you to concentrate more on finishing your education and starting a career, since you'll both need to be able to support yourselves if you do get married.

I agree with what others have said. Talk to her. If she has a valid reason for you and your girlfriend to call it off, take it into consideration and arrange something that works best for the three of you. Maybe she doesn't want you to "break up", per se. Probably just wants you to ease off seeing each other ('cause of school and other things).

Anyway, you won't know until you discuss this with her. Then make your decision.
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Postby Mangafanatic » Thu Jan 25, 2007 1:42 pm

There's a deeper reason for this. I can guarantee it. I suggest that if you really are serious about your relationship that you sit down with your girlfriend's mother and ask her to explain her thoughts to you. Perhaps she thinks you each have issues you need to work through before getting into a serious relationship. Perhaps she thinks the two of you being together might cause you to compromise yourselves because you're in a position yet to maturely handle everything? Naturally, I don't know much of anything about the situation, but I bet that if you have a long talk with her mom, you'd figure a lot of things out.
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Postby TriezGamer » Thu Jan 25, 2007 1:58 pm

Definately talk to her about it. It's very easy to miss warning signs in a relationship because you aren't looking for them -- it's possible she has a very legitimate concern based on her life experiences and observations.

The biggest thing you need to keep in mind is that you probably won't want to hear what she has to say. In my experience, my mother always turned out to be correct about my love interests in the long run.

Which isn't to say that my mother has ruined all of my relationships either, she actually supported several of them, and I being the moron that I am, destroyed the relationship all on my lonesome. :sweat:
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Postby bakura_fan » Thu Jan 25, 2007 2:13 pm

If you base your relationsip according to what parents want and not what God wants, then you have a problem. Seek God. He knows what's best.

My parents didn't want me to marry Micah, in fact...my own parents didn't attend my own wedding because they said that God was telling them it was wrong. I'm their only child, but because they were not the one's to seek Him, they missed out. (really long and complicated story) Basically, just seek His will. Pray about it. Discuss it with her and her mom. I'll be praying for ya too. God bless.
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Postby K. Ayato » Thu Jan 25, 2007 2:52 pm

TriezGamer wrote:The biggest thing you need to keep in mind is that you probably won't want to hear what she has to say. In my experience, my mother always turned out to be correct about my love interests in the long run.


Same goes for my mom. Although she and I didn't see things in my past relationship the same way, now that I look back on it, she was right all along.

Listen to your girlfriend's mom's advice, then pray about it. She might have the right thing to say, but you never know. Even if she makes sense, you'll still want to see if it's in line with God's plans.
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Postby Guardianking500 » Thu Jan 25, 2007 8:18 pm

the thing is no one will talk to me. and i want to know if i did something wrong or if it is something else. also she is not acting like herself. she's breaking up with me for no apparent reason. she just wont give me a straight answer.
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Postby Eaglestrike » Thu Jan 25, 2007 8:30 pm

Move on. Girls still aren't worth the trouble at your age. There could be a number of reasons but one thing is pretty clear, if it was going to last with you two she wouldn't be breaking up with you, or, she'd be giving you a lot more information about what's going on. I'm not saying this is a problem with you, her or her parents, but it's best to just pick your head up and keep walking.
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Postby K. Ayato » Thu Jan 25, 2007 8:56 pm

Eaglestrike's right. Even though it looks bleak, you just gotta keep moving on with your life. Who knows? Maybe it'll clear up between the two of you later. But for now, try not to worry too much about it.
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*Explosion goes off in the movie*

mechana2015: Does that answer your question?

K. Ayato: Perfectly.

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Postby bakura_fan » Sat Jan 27, 2007 3:34 pm

;-; I'm sorry warriorking. *hug* I wish I could say something to help. I dunno what's going on...>_> I know that micah and I went through something like that...he broke up with me...for almost a week...I had no idea really either. Uhm...I guess the best I can say is pray. She may be struggling through some emotions that she may not understand herself. But I will tell you this. If you continue to believe that God's plan is perfect, then if she's the one for you, she'll still be there in the end. Keep walking the path He has placed for you. And as it has been said. There is a time for everything. If you need to mourn, then mourn. But realize that He is still in control of everything. ^^, Hope that helped more than it hindred. I'll continue to pray for you. God bless.
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[color=DeepSkyBlue] "He lives in you. He lives in me. [/color]He watches over everything we see.
Into the water. Into the truth. [color=Yellow][color=DeepSkyBlue]In your reflection, He lives in you." - He lives in you chorus[/color][/color]
"Slow, love, slow. Time's so fast. Now goes quickly, see Now it's past!
Soon will come, Soon will last. Wait." [color=Yellow]- Wait (sweeney todd) [/color]

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Postby Mithrandir » Sat Jan 27, 2007 4:27 pm

warriorking500 wrote:the thing is no one will talk to me. and i want to know if i did something wrong or if it is something else. also she is not acting like herself. she's breaking up with me for no apparent reason. she just wont give me a straight answer.


I'm guessing you're not going to like what other people are saying, but most of the advice you're getting here is pretty good.

* It could be that the "my mom wants us to break up" is shielding the real reason - in which case, just move on.
* It could be she's not able to question her mother - in which case, it's probably a good idea to move on, at least for now.

If no one will talk to you, there's not much you can do. At least, I can't see anything more. This is a very hard road you have to walk, here - know that we are pulling for you!
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Postby Ashley » Sat Jan 27, 2007 4:41 pm

the thing is no one will talk to me. and i want to know if i did something wrong or if it is something else. also she is not acting like herself. she's breaking up with me for no apparent reason. she just wont give me a straight answer.


Oh goodness, I've been there twice. I don't think I could conceive of a more painful, broken way to end a relationship. I am so incredibly sorry.

If it's any consolation, however, know that it will eventually stop hurting. It may all you can think about right now, or even for the next few months, but it WILL stop. I know personally that the relationship I had after the two awful ones was infinitely better than I could have imagined, and it made me grateful the other two ended, even as badly as they did. We'll be praying.
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Postby Guardianking500 » Sun Jan 28, 2007 11:04 pm

well guys. it happens to be that we are still together. it was some wierd reason but we are pulling through.

i do however wish this thread to stay open for others who have relationship problems and are in need of advice.
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