Useless Superpowers

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Useless Superpowers

Postby tronethiel7 » Tue Nov 13, 2012 9:00 pm

In this forum you should post those superpowers which are either useless, odd, or if they are useful, only in certain obscure situations.

I shall begin.

The power to shoot spaghetti from your fingertips.

The ability to vaporize every piece of hair on your body to create a smoke screen. However, your hair only grows at its normal rate.

The ability to feign death for three seconds at a time, but if you do for longer you actually die.
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Postby anlptgtsg » Tue Nov 13, 2012 9:29 pm

Ability to drink milk without spilling. Hope that person is not lactose intolerant.
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Postby Cleanedbyblood » Tue Nov 13, 2012 10:01 pm

ability to stay organized....I need that one
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Postby Oddood198 » Tue Nov 13, 2012 10:35 pm

Ability to read about ten full pages in a full-sized, small print novel without blinking once. I have this one, it's not as useful as it sounds.
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Postby GeneD » Tue Nov 13, 2012 10:56 pm

tronethiel7 (post: 1597530) wrote:The ability to vaporize every piece of hair on your body to create a smoke screen. However, your hair only grows at its normal rate.
This would be fairly useless in a fight sure but if you could limit it to only certain parts of your body it would be fantastically convenient.

tronethiel7 (post: 1597530) wrote:The power to shoot spaghetti from your fingertips.
If you're basically generating the spaghetti you could use this power to feed people.
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Postby bobmonkeys » Tue Nov 13, 2012 11:29 pm

The power to throw terrible temper-tantrums and get away with any harm you may cause.

The ability to pull coins out of other people's ears, but never more than 50 cents.

The power to hear whenever a fingernail is being scraped across a chalkboard in the world.

The ability to understand dead languages.

The ability to spontaneously die.

The power to levitate empty peanut shells.

The ability to decrease your height by 2 inches. (permanently)

The ability to go Super Saiyan but without the power-up just changes the hair and eye color.

The ability to pee Mountain Dew. (could be useful if you don't mind drinking your own pee)

The ability to see things at the molecular level. Can't be turned off. (May as well go ahead and consider yourself blind, but you could easily become a world renowned chemist.)
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Postby rocklobster » Sun Nov 18, 2012 5:36 am

the ability to censor others as soon as they open their mouths.
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Postby DecooPunk » Sun Nov 18, 2012 10:20 am

The ability to turn yourself into any food you want.
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Postby Neane » Sun Nov 18, 2012 10:37 am

The ability to seduce hats seems somewhat useless.
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Postby MomentOfInertia » Sun Nov 18, 2012 2:40 pm

Neane (post: 1598481) wrote:The ability to seduce hats seems somewhat useless.

Unless you're in Meet the Robinsons. XP

rocklobster (post: 1598459) wrote:the ability to censor others as soon as they open their mouths.

I don't know, that could be hilarious.

Or you could use it to disrupt communications. "Control this is ____ we're _____ we need ______"

More useful for a spy/commando type than the traditional superhero.
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Postby akorecki1 » Sun Nov 18, 2012 2:45 pm

The ability to appear in a maximum of 2 feet from where you were just standing.
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Postby Mr. Hat'n'Clogs » Sun Nov 18, 2012 3:41 pm

bobmonkeys (post: 1597584) wrote:The ability to pee Mountain Dew. (could be useful if you don't mind drinking your own pee)
They taste the same anyways ohohoho
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Postby akorecki1 » Sun Nov 18, 2012 3:53 pm

bobmonkeys (post: 1597584) wrote:The ability to pee Mountain Dew. (could be useful if you don't mind drinking your own pee)


There is something saying you can only drink your pee like 3 times. :dance:
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Postby AdriTan » Sun Nov 18, 2012 10:53 pm

The ability to become blind.
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Postby Neane » Mon Nov 19, 2012 1:21 am

The ability to have X-ray vision, but you don't have proper imaging organs and so the only thing you can do is send out ionizing radiation to people and render them sterile or mutated.
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Postby SierraLea » Mon Nov 19, 2012 2:29 pm

bobmonkeys (post: 1597584) wrote:
The ability to decrease your height by 2 inches. (permanently)



I want this one bad.

The ability to turn your head 360 degrees, but you always have to turn it to the right.
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Postby TheGasMaster438 » Wed Nov 21, 2012 12:01 am

the ability to speak in binary code

the ability to turn yourself into a plastic statue

the ability to communicate with tacos

the ability to juggle empty candy bar wrappers

the ability to stare into space for 5 hours straight

the ability to throw clipped fingernails like boomerangs

the ability to call yourself

the ability to to run into a wall without hurting yourself
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Postby Panda4christ:3 » Thu Nov 22, 2012 6:52 am

Ability to immediately become ten times more ugly in photos...

Oh...wait, everybody has that...
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Postby AdriTan » Thu Nov 22, 2012 10:43 am

Hahahahahahaha not you!

The ability to lose your foot.
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Re: Useless Superpowers

Postby Cc4FuzzyHuggles » Fri Dec 14, 2012 2:35 am

In a far off land, where there is an abundance of drinking water all around, and all needs of survival have been met, including luxuries....
There is one super power which stands against them all.

The Lazy Jane Ability!

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There's just one question.... If all the needs are met and there is plenty of water in this far off land, then are we sure The Lazy Jane Ability is really so great after all?
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Re: Useless Superpowers

Postby Count Zero » Sun Dec 23, 2012 10:10 pm

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The man in this picture can take at least two of those powers listed above and make it into a great fight.. Think about that.
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Re: Useless Superpowers

Postby SierraLea » Sat Jan 12, 2013 1:46 pm

The power to make people like your offkey voice.
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Re: Useless Superpowers

Postby Pika-chan » Sat Jan 12, 2013 4:21 pm

the power to summon state farm agents to your side by simply singing the jingle, except you dont have state farm insurance. :P
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Re:

Postby Yuki-Anne » Sat Jan 12, 2013 8:40 pm

bobmonkeys wrote:The ability to decrease your height by 2 inches. (permanently)


Is this limited to only once, or can you do it multiple times?

The ability to remove any type of stain with your spit.
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Re: Re:

Postby FllMtl Novelist » Sun Jan 13, 2013 3:41 pm

Yuki-Anne wrote:The ability to remove any type of stain with your spit.

I think anyone and everyone who takes care of small children wants that superpower.
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Re: Useless Superpowers

Postby Xeno » Mon Jan 14, 2013 1:02 pm

The ability to time travel, but you can only travel 43 seconds into the future, and you can only use the power once an hour.
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Re: Useless Superpowers

Postby SilverToast » Tue Jan 15, 2013 12:16 pm

The ability to make goldfish curse and swear in the goldfish bubbles dialect.
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Re: Useless Superpowers

Postby Broly Ultimatrix » Tue Jan 15, 2013 12:57 pm

The ability to make 1+1=Fish for 5 minutes once a decade
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Re: Useless Superpowers

Postby Nate » Tue Jan 15, 2013 8:41 pm

tronethiel7 wrote:The power to shoot spaghetti from your fingertips.

That is pretty useless, especially when I always have spaghetti spilling out of my pockets anyway.
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Re: Useless Superpowers

Postby Xeno » Wed Jan 16, 2013 9:32 am

The ability to make urinal cakes change color







































with your breath.
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