Beautiful Alone - a song fic

[AngelSakura]

Kay, this is a song fic using my original character Alex and the song "Beautiful Alone" from Weiss Kreuz. It metions the thought of suicide, guns, drinking, and, uh, kissing. *ahem* Rated PG.

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~Beautiful Alone~
A song fic by AngelSakura

He sat in the back row at the funeral, staring straight ahead into the rain. He knew it would happen eventually, but he still couldn't understand, couldn't believe she was gone. The rain tapped softly on the lid of the coffin as the preist blessed it.
He could remember her sitting behing him on his motorcycle, holding tight to his waist, laughing at the feeling of the wind. He remembered their last kiss, her whisper, "Our love's eternal, never will I leave from by your side..."
Except for him, the back row was empty. They were about to lower her away from him forever. He got up, and they stopped the ropes as he slowly walked up between the aisles. Something metal hidden under his coat clinked against the front bench, and the mourners in that row winced.
Keeping his head down, he produced a red rose from somewhere in his clothing. A tear slid down his face as he tossed it onto the coffin's lid.

~~~~~~~~~~~

He lay in his bed, his coat still on, and gazed blankly at the ceiling. The glow of the setting sun crawled down the wall. He wanted to fall asleep, be he saw her in his dreams as well. He wanted to forget, to stop the memories, but at the same time they were his only comfort.
He knew he would not be separated from her forever, but it seemed so long, to long to wait. He considered the gun he always carried, but something told him she wouldn't have wanted it that way.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

He sat on his porch, twirling a red rose, her favorite flower. Roses had made her so happy, Valentine's Day, her birthday, or whenever else he could get them. Turning around, he locked the door to his now empty house, to full of memories to bear. The small pack of possesions he wanted to keep was waiting on his motorcycle.
The rain kept up, falling heavly, soaking everything. He swung his leg over the motorcycle and looked back at his house, the town, everything. It was too much to bear. He would only return to visit her grave.
He pulled the collar of his long leather coat closer to his face, to block the wind blowing just enough to shake the trees. Making sure he had everything, he brushed his black hair out of his eyes and revved his motorcycle. It stopped him. She had loved that sound. He shook his head, trying to clear it. If he cried, he could pretend it was only rain.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

He stopped at a bar. He blinked the rain and tears out of his blue eyes and slung his pack over his shoulder. His guitar echoed slightly and he put his hand up to stop it.
Inside the bar, he sat in a corner and ordered nothing. He watched the people drinking, slapping each other on the back and laughing. He waited a long while until most of the people had gone.
It was a kareoke bar, and he stepped onto the stage. He spoke softly and the remaining people stopped talking to hear him.
"My name is Alex," he said, leaning close to the microphone, "and this is a song I wrote today." He began to sing, and his small audience was amazed at how beautiful his voice was.


To every life, there's always an end,
But I close my eyes, I still see your face; beautiful...
And I throw a rose as they now lower you down,
But I still believe I'll see you again,
I wait for the day that I can once more hold you tight,
Until then, I can't cry this pain away,
Until then, memories are all I have...

How I long for one more kiss, just to hold you once again,
How I long to hear you say, "Our love's eternal, never will I leave from by your side..."

I go my way, I journey on, now 'til forever,
With the memory of our last kiss to keep me going,
And though I am alone again, I shed not a tear,
How beautiful is my loneliness, how great is my pain...


As night skies arrive, the heartache begins,
For in every dream, the image of you lingers still,
So I walk alone, sleepless, guided by the moon,
I know I'll give to eternal sleep,
And when that day comes, I'll never again let you go,
I'll pretend that I'm not about to cry,
I'll pretend that these tears are only rain,

As I lie awake at night, listening to this quiet rain,
As I bow my head in prayer, my wish is that this burning emptiness inside would heal...

I close my eyes, I turn around, and go on my way,
With the dream that somewhere out there, love, you wait for me, too,
And though I am alone again, I shed not a tear,
How beautiful is my loneliness, how great is my pain...

His small audience was silent for a minute, then they started to clap, softly, getting louder. Alex smiled weakly at the crowd and walked over to the barkeeper.
"A room for one night, don't bother with breakfast, wake me up at five," he said in his quiet voice. The barkeeper nodded, Alex put the money on the counter and walked up the stairs.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Alex woke up to the telephone. Half-asleep, he answered it with a mumbled "Tenshi-chan?" No answer. He remembered everything now, and it was so overwhelming he started to sob again. How could it be true? Why her, and not him?
He hung up the wake up call and went downstairs with his pack to the bar. He polished his guitar, then began to put on his heavy leather coat. Something stopped him. He put his hand up to his back and felt something soft. He turned in the empty bar and looked in the mirror, looked at the two soft white wings. His heart stopped for a second, then he smiled.
"Thank you, Tenshi-chan," he whispered, talking to the air. He took his knife out of an inside pocket and carefully bored two holes through his coat. He poked his wings through and straightened his feathers.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He walked outside, swung himself onto his motorcycle, then looked toward the graveyard. He saw that the rain was still falling, puddling on the ground. He held a res rose in the direction he was looking.
"Thank you."

~Disclaimer~
The lyrics and music of the song "Beautiful Alone" copyright the J-rock group Weiss Kreuz. I had no part in composing or writing it, and I found translated lyrics at http://www.animelyrics.com.

[AngelSakura]

*bumpliez*