MichiruT conquers procrastination

Upload your work in this forum for others to comment on.

MichiruT conquers procrastination

Postby Mave » Tue Sep 23, 2003 3:38 pm

Uploaded part of my very first manga... :sweat: Gah..this is making me feel horribly nervous.

1) This manga is not intended to be professional, just pencil and paper. No CG/manga techniques. Even scanning quality is pretty sad.
2) Pretty boy aka bishonen element. Inspiration: Kaikan Phrase/Phase & DragonVoice)
3) Read from RIGHT to LEFT, up down...Pls forgive my amateurish work, I realized that the words and images are really crammed all together...so T-I-G-H-T and the flow isn't very smooth. In the later pages, it should improve, ....I think. 0.o

Since they're relatively large files, I link them. Hope everyone's OK with it. 0.o Have 3-4 more pages to scan.

Chap1title j001 j002 j003 j004

Also, I've attached two pics (hope they come up well). Somehow I'm not too keen about the body proportions. :shady:
You do not have the required permissions to view the files attached to this post.
User avatar
Mave
 
Posts: 3662
Joined: Tue Aug 12, 2003 9:00 am

Postby SailorX » Tue Sep 23, 2003 4:04 pm

Those Are AWESOME! I do admit I color my art on my comp :(
Image
User avatar
SailorX
 
Posts: 65
Joined: Sun Sep 21, 2003 5:01 pm
Location: Oklahoma

Postby inkhana » Tue Sep 23, 2003 5:47 pm

It's ok, don't be nervous! Your work looks very good, and as far as text is concerned, I was up against the same thing in my own. I'm still working on proper flow also...^^


BOOSTER: Hey, No.1! Where's my cake?!
SNIFIT 1: Booster, Sir! There's a 70% chance the object you're standing on is a cake.
BOOSTER: What? THIS thing's a cake?

You have the power to say anything you want, so why not say something positive?
- Frank Capra

(in response to an interview question "Do you have a pet peeve having to do with this biz?")
People who write below their abilities in order to crank out tons of books and make a buck. Especially Christian authors who do that. Outsiders judge us for it, and make fun of us for it, and it makes Jesus look bad. We of all artists on earth should be the most concerned with doing our best possible work at all times. We of all people should write with all our hearts, as if writing for the Lord and not for men.
- Athol Dickson


Avatar by scarlethibiscus from LJ.
User avatar
inkhana
 
Posts: 3670
Joined: Fri May 30, 2003 10:00 am
Location: meh.

Postby uc pseudonym » Tue Sep 23, 2003 5:52 pm

Actually, I like what I see here very much. By this point, I'm used to left to right reading, so I don't think it will be a problem. While there is a lot on one page, none of the words felt very cramped, so don't fear on that account. Good work.
User avatar
uc pseudonym
 
Posts: 15506
Joined: Tue Jun 10, 2003 4:00 am
Location: Tanzania

Postby Shinja » Tue Sep 23, 2003 6:12 pm

yeah, im practically trained now to imediately look to the right when ever i look at a comic, but yeah great work :thumb:
MATT
Matt blends in - and hates it.

Image

Give me a bike and a road by which to travel.
User avatar
Shinja
 
Posts: 1723
Joined: Wed May 28, 2003 4:00 am
Location: Where the grinkle grass grows.

Postby Heaven's Cloud » Wed Sep 24, 2003 5:25 am

Great job. I had a friend, and we wanted to create a manga for Tokyopop, Rising Stars of manga. It was going to be something like that, but then he moved back to the Phillipines (sp?). Great work!
User avatar
Heaven's Cloud
 
Posts: 563
Joined: Wed Sep 17, 2003 5:57 pm
Location: Behind a computer

Postby StarMasayume » Wed Sep 24, 2003 9:41 am

Oh, I loved it MichiruT! :jump:

You really got your bishonens down pat :grin: They're so cute! I avoid drawing guys like the plague, but seeing your guys really makes me wish that I drew them more... I think I tackled drawing three guys in the last year. :shake: My dad is shocked whenever I draw/sketch one.

I read it pretty easily and it's very interesting! I like how you started with them doing the concert and the story has me wanting more. So get to the rest of it soon!

You going to post this on you website soon? It'd be nice to have it like on online comment so we can just click for the next pages ^_^ Oh, and though it's in pencil, it's pretty dark and clean so I don't mind you using just that. :)

:hug:

-Star
"So these three things continue; Faith, hope, and love.
The greatest of these which is love." - 1 Corinthians 13:13
Image
StarInMyPocket.net
User avatar
StarMasayume
 
Posts: 44
Joined: Fri Sep 12, 2003 5:53 pm
Location: FL

Postby Gypsy » Wed Sep 24, 2003 10:26 am

Oh wow! Excellent work! I can't wait to see more! :thumb:
||Skipping Tomorrows Webmanga||
"A ship in harbor is safe but that is not what ships are built for." - John A. Shedd
User avatar
Gypsy
 
Posts: 4056
Joined: Tue May 27, 2003 12:00 pm
Location: Hyrule

Postby Mave » Thu Oct 02, 2003 9:49 am

thanks everyone for your support ;) ...I'm definitely gonna put my works on my website. I intend to post my manga here at this thread first as a "screening" step, so do let me know if there's something you think isn't appropriate. I should be coming out with more manga pages soon. Stay tuned!

Oh yeah, pls pardon how slow things are getting out...my schedule is awfully tight this semester! Still, I managed to update my website with a few more images and banners...
User avatar
Mave
 
Posts: 3662
Joined: Tue Aug 12, 2003 9:00 am

Postby Nefla » Thu Oct 02, 2003 6:04 pm

It's really awesome, good story so far, great art! the panneling is a little confusing but not a lot. I really love your manga and I can see you becoming a professional some day if you really want to.
"Sayonara baby!"
User avatar
Nefla
 
Posts: 31
Joined: Tue Sep 09, 2003 6:32 pm
Location: Anchorage, Alaska, USA

Postby Rashiir » Sat Oct 04, 2003 12:58 pm

Looks good!
"Be joyful always." - 1 Thes 5:16
User avatar
Rashiir
 
Posts: 961
Joined: Mon Jun 02, 2003 1:28 pm
Location: California/New Haven, CT

Postby Mave » Sat Oct 11, 2003 10:05 pm

Hi everyone,

Here's my continuation of my manga (check the very first post for earlier pages and remember: Read from RIGHT to LEFT). I did them way before my schedule got really hectic but I put off scanning them. Once again, I'm linking them because the files are too big. :sweat: Sorry...

[PLS READ] This time, I'm kicking in a warning first!! I'm not sure how offensive some words are to different readers and there are some elements I've included that may be uncomfortable for some. YOU tell me. Pls PM me if you're disturbed by the usage of some words such as "d-word," "bloody" (ack, pls don't ban me for having them in my manga this time...I'm sincerely posting this to get feedback and advice!). Basically, one of the unbeliever characters has this intense hatred for christians in general because of their hypocrisy and some issues in his past and therefore, does not hold back his words on them. You know, I'm very divided between "100% clean/censored Christian fantasy" or "hello, Christians in reality/the real world." Does any budding Christian manga artist feel the same way as I do?

Of course, any healthy criticism and comments are always welcomed. Thanks everyone in advance!

Alright, here we go.

Page 5
Page 6
Page 7
Page 8
Page 9
User avatar
Mave
 
Posts: 3662
Joined: Tue Aug 12, 2003 9:00 am

Postby ShiroiHikari » Sun Oct 12, 2003 12:24 am

How did I miss this?!?!? This is very good work :D I really like your art and I think the story is cool too! Argh, I'm hooked! Must...read...more! *_* You draw cute guys ^^;; Lol.
fightin' in the eighties
User avatar
ShiroiHikari
 
Posts: 7564
Joined: Wed May 28, 2003 12:00 pm
Location: Somewhere between 1983 and 1989

Postby andyroo » Sun Oct 12, 2003 8:40 pm

Nice work.
"As vinegar to the teeth and smoke to the eyes, so is a sluggard to those who send him." ~Proverbs 10:26
†
The Ideas Behind Anime |

The difference between intelligence and stupidity is that intelligence has its limits.
A proud member of P.I.E. -- Pictures of Inkhana for Everyone! Join the fight!
User avatar
andyroo
 
Posts: 815
Joined: Tue Jun 10, 2003 11:00 am
Location: Alabama

Postby Mave » Thu Oct 16, 2003 7:40 am

thanks.... ;) But erm, has everyone really looked at it? I thought I'll get more feedback on this set of pages. Pls evaluate for me guys...thanks! Coz I'll soon be putting them up on my website and starting on another set of pages.

hehe I love bishonens a lot and plan for my work to include lots of them...guess, my work is going to be for young ladies or any bishonen lover but want to have Bishonen of Standard :grin: ....I'll create adventure/fantasy/action stories eventually WHEN my schedule permits me.. :dizzy:
User avatar
Mave
 
Posts: 3662
Joined: Tue Aug 12, 2003 9:00 am

Postby uc pseudonym » Thu Oct 16, 2003 1:16 pm

This is an attempt to give honest criticism, where I can actually be helpful.

Page 6: the action panels are a bit vague, especially the smallest ones in the third row. Not sure how to fix that.

Page 7: again, third row. Doug's speech bubble in the middle panel suddenly changes to box format. That didn't make a whole lot of sense to me (though it read fine). Then, in the subsequent panel, when he speaks again you use the box format. While this works, I think a bubble with no direction attached is the traditional way to resolve that.

I like Doug.
User avatar
uc pseudonym
 
Posts: 15506
Joined: Tue Jun 10, 2003 4:00 am
Location: Tanzania

Postby Mave » Sun Oct 19, 2003 2:44 pm

Hey UC, thanks!

I didn't even realize the box panel thingy on page 7. ^^ Alright, will work on fixing that!

Doug was meant to represent individuals who easily get judged by others by their outer looks, even by Christians:sweat: (don't we all make that serious mistake? I have.). That impression changes when one gets to know him better. I don't really have plans for him yet (but would love to eventually) coz Solomon will move on and meet a whole bunch of new (and 'hopefully just as likeable as Doug') characters.

Peace. :thumb:
User avatar
Mave
 
Posts: 3662
Joined: Tue Aug 12, 2003 9:00 am

Postby uc pseudonym » Sun Oct 19, 2003 5:20 pm

I certainly hope he appears again eventually. There's something about his depth of character I enjoy. Plus, he was a very welcome contrast to Soloman's idealism. I'm sure you'll do well with future characters.

What plans do you have for this? Continued shoujo, I assume?
User avatar
uc pseudonym
 
Posts: 15506
Joined: Tue Jun 10, 2003 4:00 am
Location: Tanzania

Postby Mave » Thu Oct 23, 2003 2:52 pm

Continued shoujo's the way to go, if God permits, UC. heh ;)

To answer anonymous, once I have the plot, I start first with creating characters, their looks, backgrounds, values, habits, struggles. Even explanations as to "Why him? Why is this person so annoying?" :lol: I will try to answer, "Why did Doug use to follow Jesus? Why is Solomon erm...seemingly simple-minded and very trusting? The enthusiasm of a born-again Christian or something more to it?" The fun part I look forward to is seeing how Solomon, Doug and other characters mature and change (for good or worse, who's to know?).

Anyway, once I get a character figured out, then it's, "Erm...where do I put him/her now and How?" I have many ongoing stories going through my head (usually 5 to 6 at one go). I can't think about all of them at the same time(!!) so, I guess it's 1/2 "pull along as the story goes" and 1/2 "I already have something planned." As the story goes, I'll add as I see it fit. For this manga, I already have around 10 characters lined up to be added.

Erm..amidst all my rantings, does this answer the Q?
User avatar
Mave
 
Posts: 3662
Joined: Tue Aug 12, 2003 9:00 am

Postby esuteru » Fri Oct 31, 2003 5:07 pm

wow...the "altar call" page gave me the "gooseflesh"(I'm not sure how to write the term "chicken skin" in English^^).I have enjoyed reading this,it's so interesting ,the art is smooth too.
User avatar
esuteru
 
Posts: 21
Joined: Fri Oct 31, 2003 1:01 pm

Postby Shinja » Fri Oct 31, 2003 5:20 pm

goose bumps or goose pimples :thumb:
MATT
Matt blends in - and hates it.

Image

Give me a bike and a road by which to travel.
User avatar
Shinja
 
Posts: 1723
Joined: Wed May 28, 2003 4:00 am
Location: Where the grinkle grass grows.

Postby true_noir_chloe » Sat Nov 15, 2003 11:11 pm

I can't believe I missed this until now. I love how you draw. :wow!: Your style is fantastic. You're so young and you've figured out how to use each panel to cause the effect you're desiring for the reader to experience. I love your expressions. I never realized you were so talented. I say those are some of the best-looking bishonens I've seen in a while. :thumb:

I don't think I'd comment on anything drastic. I can see you're learning and you'll get better the more you do it. You are, however, way ahead of so many others I've seen. And, I really like the black and white. Most mangas are in black and white, so please keep it the way you're doing it.

Well, maybe one comment. You could spread the panels out a bit more so they don't get too squished together and just have more pages.

I'm just so impressed with you, Michiru. :)

[size=84][color=seagreen]YOU SEE


You see into the deepest part of me ---

beyond the fog I hide behind.

You cast your light upon the shadows

that stretch like cobwebs in my mind.

You ease the pain when I am hurting,

and morbid visions from my past

pierce into the realm of Reason

as though I danced on blades of glass.

You grant me strength when I have fallen

and, once again, I've lost my way.

You take my hand in Yours and lead me

into the promise of a brand new day.

You bring order to all my chaos,

yet set my well-laid plans awry.

You place me on a firm foundation ---

then give me wings so I can fly.

You sand away my roughened edges

and polish all the dullest parts

until I stand before Your presence...

a newly-sculpted work of art.

You see into the heart within me,

right through my motives and selfish will.

And yet, in spite of all You see

You say You love me even still.


~by D.M.~

[/color][/size]
User avatar
true_noir_chloe
 
Posts: 3091
Joined: Wed Sep 10, 2003 12:00 pm
Location: Where Tex-Mex is the best! ^_____^

ooh ooh ooh..screentoning here I come!

Postby Mave » Sun Nov 16, 2003 2:13 pm

Dear all,

I apologize for the delay in my manga :sweat: ...I'm really struggling with my daily activities and it'll be like this until I get out from grad school (Dec 2004). I really do appreciate the positive feedback though...I already have a fan? :red: Ack, spiritual check!! "It's God's work, not mine! Praise God!" ;)

Anyway, in great embarassment, I announce that, ladies and gentlemen, yours truly stumbled upon this mighty and wonderful function last Friday called "layers" and have been excited over it eversince. It's one of those "DO0000HHHHH!!" moment coz all this while, I've been CGing without layers, merely using "multiply." Dumb eh? But God is still Good. I'm very happy to be able to learn screentoning. In fact, I've submitted my very first screentone effort. It's a pic of Doug from my manga and hopefully, everyone likes it coz it costed me at least 4 hours to put it together! Where do manga artists get their patience and endurance???!!! :dizzy:

I had a hard time uploading the pic so I've included a link for it.


CLICK here! 1st Screentone-Doug CLICK here!


Regretfully, I don't have a manga update yet..(I'm working on it ^^) Thanks to everyone who suggested it, I will seriously "desquash" my panels. haha I personally get annoyed with them myself. It's like telling me not to be so uptight or something. :lol:

Cheers until the next update!
User avatar
Mave
 
Posts: 3662
Joined: Tue Aug 12, 2003 9:00 am

Postby shooraijin » Sun Nov 16, 2003 2:54 pm

> I announce that, ladies and gentlemen, yours truly stumbled upon this mighty and wonderful function last Friday called "layers"

:lol:

I'm going to make myself look truly ancient (although I salute my fellow, and in some cases, elder 'senior citizens' here ;) ) -- I remember when layers first appeared in Photoshop. Later, when the use of layers nearly became obligatory in PS 4 I was sort of baffled how to make good use of them initially. Now, I wonder how I ever got along without them.
"you're a doctor.... and 27 years.... so...doctor + 27 years = HATORI SOHMA" - RoyalWing, when I was 27
"Al hail the forum editting Shooby! His vibes are law!" - Osaka-chan

I could still be champ, but I'd feel bad taking it away from one of the younger guys. - George Foreman
User avatar
shooraijin
 
Posts: 9922
Joined: Thu Jun 26, 2003 12:00 pm
Location: Southern California

Postby inkhana » Sun Nov 16, 2003 8:56 pm

That looks really cool! The pic was awfully tiny though...-_-

You have a fan! *waves* I'd guess more than one, too...^^

Layers are like, the best graphics thing ever! Yay for layers!


BOOSTER: Hey, No.1! Where's my cake?!
SNIFIT 1: Booster, Sir! There's a 70% chance the object you're standing on is a cake.
BOOSTER: What? THIS thing's a cake?

You have the power to say anything you want, so why not say something positive?
- Frank Capra

(in response to an interview question "Do you have a pet peeve having to do with this biz?")
People who write below their abilities in order to crank out tons of books and make a buck. Especially Christian authors who do that. Outsiders judge us for it, and make fun of us for it, and it makes Jesus look bad. We of all artists on earth should be the most concerned with doing our best possible work at all times. We of all people should write with all our hearts, as if writing for the Lord and not for men.
- Athol Dickson


Avatar by scarlethibiscus from LJ.
User avatar
inkhana
 
Posts: 3670
Joined: Fri May 30, 2003 10:00 am
Location: meh.

Postby Mave » Sun Nov 16, 2003 9:22 pm

inkhana wrote:That looks really cool! The pic was awfully tiny though...-_-

You have a fan! *waves* I'd guess more than one, too...^^

Layers are like, the best graphics thing ever! Yay for layers!


uh oh...don't tell me you clicked on the thumbnail? You're supposed to click on the link, that'll lead to a bigger file. @_@ I think I had better remove the thumbnail to avoid further confusion. :sweat: Sorry, sorry...
User avatar
Mave
 
Posts: 3662
Joined: Tue Aug 12, 2003 9:00 am

Postby inkhana » Sun Nov 16, 2003 9:34 pm

I guess I'd better read things a little better before I make assumptions...O.o LOL


BOOSTER: Hey, No.1! Where's my cake?!
SNIFIT 1: Booster, Sir! There's a 70% chance the object you're standing on is a cake.
BOOSTER: What? THIS thing's a cake?

You have the power to say anything you want, so why not say something positive?
- Frank Capra

(in response to an interview question "Do you have a pet peeve having to do with this biz?")
People who write below their abilities in order to crank out tons of books and make a buck. Especially Christian authors who do that. Outsiders judge us for it, and make fun of us for it, and it makes Jesus look bad. We of all artists on earth should be the most concerned with doing our best possible work at all times. We of all people should write with all our hearts, as if writing for the Lord and not for men.
- Athol Dickson


Avatar by scarlethibiscus from LJ.
User avatar
inkhana
 
Posts: 3670
Joined: Fri May 30, 2003 10:00 am
Location: meh.

Postby true_noir_chloe » Sun Nov 16, 2003 10:44 pm

Can I steal your Doug picture with the screen tones to place in my pics? If not, just let me know; I want to show it to somebody. Your talent is just so amazing. ^-^

[size=84][color=seagreen]YOU SEE


You see into the deepest part of me ---

beyond the fog I hide behind.

You cast your light upon the shadows

that stretch like cobwebs in my mind.

You ease the pain when I am hurting,

and morbid visions from my past

pierce into the realm of Reason

as though I danced on blades of glass.

You grant me strength when I have fallen

and, once again, I've lost my way.

You take my hand in Yours and lead me

into the promise of a brand new day.

You bring order to all my chaos,

yet set my well-laid plans awry.

You place me on a firm foundation ---

then give me wings so I can fly.

You sand away my roughened edges

and polish all the dullest parts

until I stand before Your presence...

a newly-sculpted work of art.

You see into the heart within me,

right through my motives and selfish will.

And yet, in spite of all You see

You say You love me even still.


~by D.M.~

[/color][/size]
User avatar
true_noir_chloe
 
Posts: 3091
Joined: Wed Sep 10, 2003 12:00 pm
Location: Where Tex-Mex is the best! ^_____^

Postby Mave » Mon Nov 17, 2003 10:55 am

[quote="true_noir_chloe"]Can I steal your Doug picture with the screen tones to place in my pics? If not, just let me know]

Do you mean 'steal' as in saving the file in your computer for reference or eye candy? haha If so, I don't consider that stealing, I call it 'sharing.' :brow: I wouldn't be posting it here if I didn't trust you guys anyway...^^ Yes, you may. :thumb: Thanks for asking!
User avatar
Mave
 
Posts: 3662
Joined: Tue Aug 12, 2003 9:00 am

Postby true_noir_chloe » Mon Nov 17, 2003 7:50 pm

Thanks Michiru. :) I saved it to my file. Sweet. ;)

[size=84][color=seagreen]YOU SEE


You see into the deepest part of me ---

beyond the fog I hide behind.

You cast your light upon the shadows

that stretch like cobwebs in my mind.

You ease the pain when I am hurting,

and morbid visions from my past

pierce into the realm of Reason

as though I danced on blades of glass.

You grant me strength when I have fallen

and, once again, I've lost my way.

You take my hand in Yours and lead me

into the promise of a brand new day.

You bring order to all my chaos,

yet set my well-laid plans awry.

You place me on a firm foundation ---

then give me wings so I can fly.

You sand away my roughened edges

and polish all the dullest parts

until I stand before Your presence...

a newly-sculpted work of art.

You see into the heart within me,

right through my motives and selfish will.

And yet, in spite of all You see

You say You love me even still.


~by D.M.~

[/color][/size]
User avatar
true_noir_chloe
 
Posts: 3091
Joined: Wed Sep 10, 2003 12:00 pm
Location: Where Tex-Mex is the best! ^_____^

Next

Return to Art Corner

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 64 guests