I kinda feel bad...

[Sapphire225]

(It's been a while since I came here)

Anyway, I was in french class and I wasn't feeling so well (headache, sore throat, stomach ache) and was listening to the teacher. There is this REALLY annoying sophmore boy in my class who sits next to me (I decided to sit next to him because I had felt kind of sorry for him for the first couple of days of school because nobody was speaking to him and thought he was annoying)

Anyway, after months of sitting next to him, I came to realize why he was so annoying. He doesn't listen, annoys everybody, pokes me too much (He's too playful), and doesn't know when to stop.

So anyway, as I'm trying to listen in class, he flips the hood of my jacket on my head. I pull it down. Then he does it again. I tell him to stop nicely. He doesn't listen and does it again. I tell him a little louder to stop. He does it again. I loudly tell him to stop, causing him and a few students to back up and look forward.

Then he does it again. This time, I don't say anything and pull it down. It was until, he did it again, I lost my temper. I yell very loudly, "STOOOOOOOOOP!!!" in class and that grabs alot of people attention. Because of my sore throat and the fact I have a semi deep voice for a girl, my scream sounds a bit deep and raspy.

So anyway, the teacher pulls him away from me and talks to him outside. While that is happening, everyone starts to talk aout how I yelled and how annoying he is.

Anyway, as class began to start back again and ended, I wound up losing my voice.

But the point is, I have never yelled at someone older than me. I never yelled back to my parents (but to my younger siblings when they get on my nerves) teachers, or anyone in general. I'm usually quiet(when around people that I don't know) and a tiny bit shy(Around people that I don't think are friendly), but I feel as though I've done something wrong. I should have just kept my mouth shut instead of yelling so loud. I feel bad for yelling in class and for yelling at him because I don't really know why he may be acting this way because I've noticed he seems to have issues at home probably. And I apologized to the teacher (even though she was sympathetic to me, and he was annoying to her)

Thank God that it began to snow (well, rain then snow and hail) at my school and we got out two hours early. But I still feel bad.

[carneman]

hey, when people keep doing annoying stuff, you have to let them know that they need to stop. there was nothing wrong with what you did.

[Sapphire225]

hey, when people keep doing annoying stuff, you have to let them know that they need to stop. there was nothing wrong with what you did.

Yeah, but I don't think I had to yell so loud.

[USSRGirl]

Wow... I second carneman. If someone was bugging me like that after repeatedly telling them nicely to stop, I probably would've slammed my notebook over their head. Sapphire, there is nothing wrong with making yourself heard. Being assertive is not disrespectful, especially when someone is acting like a bratty two year old. You seem to have a pretty good temper if 'stop' was all you yelled. I understand you want to be friendly to this kid since their may be reasons for why he acts the way he does, but you're not going to help anyone by allowing stuff like that to continue.

[Sapphire225]

Wow... I second carneman. If someone was bugging me like that after repeatedly telling them nicely to stop, I probably would've slammed my notebook over their head. Sapphire, there is nothing wrong with making yourself heard. Being assertive is not disrespectful, especially when someone is acting like a bratty two year old. You seem to have a pretty good temper if 'stop' was all you yelled. I understand you want to be friendly to this kid since their may be reasons for why he acts the way he does, but you're not going to help anyone by allowing stuff like that to continue.

Thanks, but because of that, I think I've made my friends a bit uneasy to be around me (even though they don't get on my nerves) And I was really tempted to throw something at him the second time, but hitting people isn't my thing (unless if he was goind to do it a few more times, which I highly doubt)

[GracefulRocker]

Trust me, you did nothing wrong. It's ok to use aggression on occasion if someone is simply refusing to listen when you say stop.

Annnnnnd I know you'll probably think that this is corny, but he probably thinks you're cute. He kept bugging you, because that was the only way you paid him any attention. You said that he pokes you alot. That gets you to talk to him, plus, he gets to touch you. I think all guys do that sort of thing at some point, plus, (sorry guys), guys, especially highschool ones, are incredibly immature.

I'm not trying to defend him, I'm just tossing out ideas as to why he's such acting like such a dork. Obviously, he's not the most popular guy in school, so, again, being annoying is the only way he feels that he can be noticed. And even then, all he gets is negative reactions. Don't be mean to him, 'cause he needs a friend and a self esteem boost, but also let him know your boundaries. We learn to interact with others and form relationships with those around us by testing the waters and getting to know each other. It's practice, and some of us need it more than others.

My advice to you, is to apologize to him on Monday, and let him know that he went too far. Explain to him that you were not feeling well, and that at times like that, or any other time, stop means stop right now. Don't be mean, but sweetly say 'bad dog.' Try to be his friend, because he may need one. Sometimes, we hide behind annoying facades because we think people won't like who we really are. Wow, I sound like one of those boring self esteem videos we watched in health class. lol

In the meantime, just pray for God to give the poor boy some maturity and common sense, but don't hold your breath. Just remeber that God often puts difficult people in our lives for a reason.

Sorry if this was too much. It's just that I've dealt with guys like this before. I know they drive ya nuts. I hope my rambling has helped......

[Sapphire225]

[quote="GracefulRocker"]Trust me, you did nothing wrong. It's ok to use aggression on occasion if someone is simply refusing to listen when you say stop.

Annnnnnd I know you'll probably think that this is corny, but he probably thinks you're cute. He kept bugging you, because that was the only way you paid him any attention. You said that he pokes you alot. That gets you to talk to him, plus, he gets to touch you. I think all guys do that sort of thing at some point, plus, (sorry guys), guys, especially highschool ones, are incredibly immature.

I'm not trying to defend him, I'm just tossing out ideas as to why he's such acting like such a dork. Obviously, he's not the most popular guy in school, so, again, being annoying is the only way he feels that he can be noticed. And even then, all he gets is negative reactions. Don't be mean to him, 'cause he needs a friend and a self esteem boost, but also let him know your boundaries. We learn to interact with others and form relationships with those around us by testing the waters and getting to know each other. It's practice, and some of us need it more than others.

My advice to you, is to apologize to him on Monday, and let him know that he went too far. Explain to him that you were not feeling well, and that at times like that, or any other time, stop means stop right now. Don't be mean, but sweetly say 'bad dog.' ]

That really does help. Don't worry. But I find it pretty hard for him to forgive me. Even though all I said (well, yelled) was stop, he doesn't seem like the type to actually listen. (Plus, for some reason, he skips school with his friends. I've seen him.) And he said he already had a girlfriend. (Which I'm not sure if he is lying or not)

[Puguni]

We all have angry impluses; God knows I've had my share. ;;>>

However, it doesn't mean it's right. I know you feel bad, and I'm glad you do, but what's done is done. If something like that were to happen again, it would probably be best to get a teacher involved before you blow your top, unless it's life threatening. o.o Just do better next time, ne?

[Sapphire225]

[quote="Puguni"]We all have angry impluses]

Not that I disagree with you. I agree, but at that moment (I really don't know what I was thinking when I screamed) I thought that was the only way to get him to stop.

I'm kind of the Phlegmatic type, but around friends and other quiet people, I act a bit more differently, since I've known them better and have more trust in them.

I kind of feel like the youngest person and childish person at this site since I seem to be complaining the most. Even at age 14, I should know better, (but going to a private school where you know everyone and going to High School for the first time is probably one of the reasons why I feel like this, but still...) to think this through, but I need someone to talk to because I don't wanna tell my parents and I feel pretty much more comfortable here to share my problems here so...

[GracefulRocker]

Hmm, well, typically, people who hang out with crowds who do things like skip class, only hang out with them to feel included. They don't nessacarily accept you for who you are, but for what you are willing to do to make them happy. (I hate people pleasers, and I am often one of them. *sigh*)

He may feel like he wants better friends than that, but either he does not conciously realize it, he dosn't think he can do any better, or being a royal pain is his way of trying to be a 'class clown' because those guys are typically popular. OR he's just no where close to acting his own age, and he isn't worth your time to befriend. Test the waters and see. Don't push him away right off.

Oh, and about the girlfriend, don't belive that until you have SEEN sufficient evidence. Guys often make stuff up and brag about stuff like that because they think it will A) make them more desirable to you, B) make them seem cooler, or C) both.

You said he's a sophomore. Do you now what the word sophomore means? It means 'foolish knowledge.' He thinks he knows everything, because he's not a freshman anymore, but he's still just a kid with no real world experience. See? Foolish knowledge.

There was this guy, my freshman year, who seemed like he just didn't care. All he did was make perverted jokes and play magic cards wiht his dorky friends. He sat at what my friend called 'the undateable dip' table, and he and I hated each other, becasue we were both very opinionated. He felt the need to tease me and contradict everything I said. 2 years later, he's in my art class, and he's grown up slightly, just enough for me to tolerate him to get to know him.

I've been dating him for over a year now.

I'm not saying you should consider dating him, only to try and be friends. People act a certain way at school, but are really the exact opposite. A persons' character is not how they behave in public, but how they behave when alone, and/or completely comfortable.

Whoops, I rambled again. Sorry!

[Puguni]

Not that I disagree with you. I agree, but at that moment (I really don't know what I was thinking when I screamed) I thought that was the only way to get him to stop.

Right, and I understand. Sometimes it just happens without a second thought, and there's nothing you can really do about them; I'm just telling you for future reference if and when you do remember.

[Sapphire225]

Hmm, well, typically, people who hang out with crowds who do things like skip class, only hang out with them to feel included. They don't nessacarily accept you for who you are, but for what you are willing to do to make them happy. (I hate people pleasers, and I am often one of them. *sigh*)

He may feel like he wants better friends than that, but either he does not conciously realize it, he dosn't think he can do any better, or being a royal pain is his way of trying to be a 'class clown' because those guys are typically popular. OR he's just no where close to acting his own age, and he isn't worth your time to befriend. Test the waters and see. Don't push him away right off.

Oh, and about the girlfriend, don't belive that until you have SEEN sufficient evidence. Guys often make stuff up and brag about stuff like that because they think it will A) make them more desirable to you, B) make them seem cooler, or C) both.

You said he's a sophomore. Do you now what the word sophomore means? It means 'foolish knowledge.' He thinks he knows everything, because he's not a freshman anymore, but he's still just a kid with no real world experience. See? Foolish knowledge.

There was this guy, my freshman year, who seemed like he just didn't care. All he did was make perverted jokes and play magic cards wiht his dorky friends. He sat at what my friend called 'the undateable dip' table, and he and I hated each other, becasue we were both very opinionated. He felt the need to tease me and contradict everything I said. 2 years later, he's in my art class, and he's grown up slightly, just enough for me to tolerate him to get to know him.

I've been dating him for over a year now.

I'm not saying you should consider dating him, only to try and be friends. People act a certain way at school, but are really the exact opposite. A persons' character is not how they behave in public, but how they behave when alone, and/or completely comfortable.

Whoops, I rambled again. Sorry!

I take that in mind when I see him Monday.