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Ticked off

PostPosted: Wed Nov 02, 2005 10:22 am
by Taka
:mutter:
I hate people who talk behind others backs. If you have a problem, say it to their face!

I am just a little upset as someone was doing this about someone I love. When will people GROW UP!?

:rant:

PostPosted: Wed Nov 02, 2005 10:29 am
by TheMelodyMaker
I'm sorry that happened, Taka -- that's why I try to avoid speaking or even thinking badly of anyone at all if I can help it. I've tried to make Ephesians 5:19 my "don't speak badly of anyone" verse:

[Speak] to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody in your heart to the Lord.

(Hope I didn't take that out of context. ^_^; )

PostPosted: Wed Nov 02, 2005 3:18 pm
by Taka
Mmmmh. Yea. It just made me really angry. I mean, like I'm angry at this person for stuff already, but then doing that. Just gets to me. And even tho I'm upset with them, I'm not going to go around slandering them. Whatever. I just had to "scream" at something.

PostPosted: Wed Nov 02, 2005 3:40 pm
by Kurama
I know what you mean

PostPosted: Wed Nov 02, 2005 3:44 pm
by Alice
One time in the theater with my brother, I was making fun of... a celebrity. And... afterwards... I felt so gulity. It's wrong to mock people, make fun of them, or slander them.

I don't think that person is perfect, but I never want to do that again.

So... basically... yeah I know what you mean. :sweat:

PostPosted: Wed Nov 02, 2005 3:47 pm
by Syaoran
I get that alot when I was in Hight school. Now that I am in college it stoped for now. So I know how you feel about how some on speeks behind some ones back.

PostPosted: Wed Nov 02, 2005 5:00 pm
by K. Ayato
I hear ya, Taka. I don't like it either. I've always wondered why people do something like that. It's like they're afraid of addressing the situation directly or something. *Sigh* Sorry to hear you're upset. Hope things turn out ok :).

PostPosted: Wed Nov 02, 2005 9:39 pm
by ~Natsumi Lam~
yea i understand your point of view.

~NL~

PostPosted: Thu Nov 03, 2005 7:05 am
by Taka
Syaoran wrote:I get that alot when I was in Hight school. Now that I am in college it stoped for now. So I know how you feel about how some on speeks behind some ones back.



Yea. We are out of highschool, and you would think all the pettyness stoped there. :eyebrow:


HA.


Eh. I can't let it get to me so much. I just lose respect for the person who does that. Gotta move on.

PostPosted: Thu Nov 03, 2005 7:16 am
by Gypsy
Heh, there's a Superchick song about still acting like you're in high school.

"... If someone puts you down - that's so high school
Someone talks behind your back - that's so high school
Thinking you have to get them back - that's also high school"

I think you're on the right track, Taka.

Sometimes it's really hard to let go of something like that, and once you think you're over it - bam! That person will do something else and all of the sudden every wrong they've ever done is stacked against them again. If you're going to forgive, it means giving someone a clean slate, not stowing something away in a file just to get it off your desk.

PostPosted: Thu Nov 03, 2005 12:47 pm
by Alice
Yeah, but does forgiveness mean they automatically have your trust again? I think people have to earn trust, whereas no one can earn forgiveness (IMO).

PostPosted: Thu Nov 03, 2005 1:39 pm
by starfire
Oi. I have to admit, I was like that in junior high. I was hurt by what people said, and I know I hurt others. Backstabbing is just one of those things that makes you look back and cringe.

The tongue truly is a dangerous weapon.

PostPosted: Thu Nov 03, 2005 6:23 pm
by Myoti
I'm trying to get better about saying anything of that sort, as it really does irritate me, such as how alot of people talk about one of my friends alot of them believe is, well, gay. I don't want to judge unless I discover it myself, and even then, I want to try and help, not put him down because of it.

Another instance was Josh, this black guy who use to visit our church. Well, alot of people in my youth group found him irritating, and he was a bit sometimes, especially during our lock-in. But they way they talked about him wasn't showing them to be the true Christian youth group I expected, and I was closing to getting very angry at the way they were talking, more like one of those "If you feel that way, go talk to him about and stop doing it behind his back!" instances.

PostPosted: Fri Nov 04, 2005 8:03 am
by Taka
Thank you for your input everyone.

Gypsy, that song made me think of another by Sara Groves that goes

"Every time I find healing you're making a new mess
And I am learning the real meaning of forgiveness
And it hurts when you hit at the hearts of the ones I love
When everything you touch is rumble and dust
And it gets so hard to know how to trust
But I will not let that bitter root grow
I will not let it no no"

And between the two songs, yea, that says alot. I don't think I have to trust this person, Alice, forgiviness means forgivness, period, which alone is alot, but it does not mean you automaticly earn back trust or creditability. I will not expect the worst from this person, because that is not giving them a chance, but I will be wary of them all the same. Careful, I guess.

Myoti, I understand. I am very cirtical at times, and I need to watch myself, but I become more aware of how it hurts when I'm on the recieving end, or affected by it, as I am now. The thing is, this person used to be kind to the one they spoke ill of. That is what hurts even more. You would hope that in a healthy relationship you would talk about these things, not back bite. :thumbsdow