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Is it always going to be like this?

PostPosted: Thu Jun 02, 2005 6:25 pm
by Alice
(If this is in the wrong area, could an admin move it, please?)

(I really wanted to post this anonymously, but I couldn't find a legal way.) :sweat:

I keep hearing about titles that aren't really shonen ai/yaoi, but when I look at them, they seem like it to me. Am I just too sensitive?

A few years ago I fell away from the Lord and got into some of that stuff online. I thought the Lord had totally saved me from it a while ago, but sometimes I still get those feelings. Is it just always going to be like this for me? Avoiding anime and manga completely seemed to help for awhile, but even that didn't completely solve it.

I read the first volume of DNAngel, and I agree, it's probably not shonen ai -- but a couple frames in it brought that stuff to mind for me, so I'm planning not to read any further in the series. But... is it always going to be like this for me? Because I fell away a while ago, am I always going to be a little bit of a pervert?

PostPosted: Thu Jun 02, 2005 6:44 pm
by Joshua Christopher
Alice wrote:(If this is in the wrong area, could an admin move it, please?)

(I really wanted to post this anonymously, but I couldn't find a legal way.) :sweat:

I keep hearing about titles that aren't really shonen ai/yaoi, but when I look at them, they seem like it to me. Am I just too sensitive?

A few years ago I fell away from the Lord and got into some of that stuff online. I thought the Lord had totally saved me from it a while ago, but sometimes I still get those feelings. Is it just always going to be like this for me? Avoiding anime and manga completely seemed to help for awhile, but even that didn't completely solve it.

I read the first volume of DNAngel, and I agree, it's probably not shonen ai -- but a couple frames in it brought that stuff to mind for me, so I'm planning not to read any further in the series. But... is it always going to be like this for me? Because I fell away a while ago, am I always going to be a little bit of a pervert?



Everyone struggles with stuff, Alice. It's different for each individual person, but still. You can overcome this, but don't beat yourself up about it. Just try not to think about these things. It's tough, but try focusing on other things, and try reading the Bible, which usually tends to help me.

PostPosted: Thu Jun 02, 2005 6:45 pm
by Arnobius
Alice wrote:(If this is in the wrong area, could an admin move it, please?)

(I really wanted to post this anonymously, but I couldn't find a legal way.) :sweat:

I keep hearing about titles that aren't really shonen ai/yaoi, but when I look at them, they seem like it to me. Am I just too sensitive?

A few years ago I fell away from the Lord and got into some of that stuff online. I thought the Lord had totally saved me from it a while ago, but sometimes I still get those feelings. Is it just always going to be like this for me? Avoiding anime and manga completely seemed to help for awhile, but even that didn't completely solve it.

I read the first volume of DNAngel, and I agree, it's probably not shonen ai -- but a couple frames in it brought that stuff to mind for me, so I'm planning not to read any further in the series. But... is it always going to be like this for me? Because I fell away a while ago, am I always going to be a little bit of a pervert?

It is possible that you may be tempted with this for a long term. Some of us have weaknesses where we need to take special precautions with. It's why I avoid certain anime and manga. If we feel tempted to sin, it is best to avoid the material that brings us to sin, even if it causes no problems in other people.

I'll pray for you here. I don't know if I can help, but if you want to PM me, I'll try to listen at least.

PostPosted: Thu Jun 02, 2005 6:56 pm
by Vash is a plant
Hopefully, this will help: "So if you think you are standing firm, be careful you don't fall! No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful, He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, He will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it." 1 Corinthians 10:12-13. That might be a little off topic, but something says it might be of use to you. :sweat:

I've never read DNAngel, but what you're talking about is probably fanservice for girls. For some reason, there are a lot of girls that find shonen-ai and yaoi to be... attractive... Some series will imply things like that.

If a series makes you incomfortable because of your current morals, or perhaps because of who you were, then don't read/watch it.

"If your hand causes you to sin, cut it off. It is better for you to enter life maimed than with two hands to go into hell, where the fire never goes out. And if your eye causes you to sin, pluck it out. It is better for you to enter the kingdom of God with one eye than to have two eyes and be thrown into hell," -Mark 9:43-47

Good idea on not seeing any more of it. :thumb:

^.^ Just do what you know to be right and what sits well with your conscience. Don't worry about being over sensitive. ^.^

Hoped that helped a bit! :sweat: PM if you need anything!

-Plant

PostPosted: Thu Jun 02, 2005 7:01 pm
by Alice
thanks everyone

I still wish I could've been anonymous. :sweat:

but thanks

PostPosted: Thu Jun 02, 2005 7:10 pm
by Arnobius
Alice wrote:thanks everyone

I still wish I could've been anonymous. :sweat:

but thanks

I do know what you mean. I wonder if the mods could set up a sort of section for that-- on the other hand, if it was anonymous, it would be hard to ID the trolls who would probably abuse it

...and we're not supposed to have multiple registrations either.

So I don't know.

Any Mods or Admins have an idea out there?

PostPosted: Thu Jun 02, 2005 7:14 pm
by Vash is a plant
Alice wrote:thanks everyone

I still wish I could've been anonymous. :sweat:

but thanks


Don't worry. You won't be hazed here. If it's who you were you are ashamed of, then turn it around and use it as evidence that you need Jesus and that everyone falls and susceptable to sin. <3 Here, you will be loved! ^.^

PostPosted: Thu Jun 02, 2005 7:20 pm
by Jasdero
Everyone's got some perverse tendencies in their mind. I think that with time and effort, you'll be able to get a good handle on it. ^__^ Meanwhile, avoiding what you find to be triggers for these thoughts could be both a good or bad thing. Good in that you'll be able to keep it all at bay for the time being. Bad because, in some cases, not working at it actively by, for example, not reading D.N. Angel might just let this problem lay dormant until you try something else. What I'm trying to say is that if you were to not keep working at it, it would just resurface sooner or later, I believe. In my case, I find that by telling myself actively that something is fine, and that I MUST get over this by continuouly going at it leaves me at ease. However, you know yourself better than anyone else. If you think that by pushing all the subjects that bring up these thoughts, whether intentionally or not (When I say "intentionally," I mean, like a blatant shonen ai/yaoi manga.), is going to help you fight these thoughts to their death, then by all means, go for it! Meanwhile, whichever method you decide, I'll be praying for you. If you ever need support with something that disturbed you, I'm willing to listen and try to help, though I can't say I have much to offer. ^__^;;; But yes, once again, I believe that you can fight this off!
Alice wrote:thanks everyone

I still wish I could've been anonymous. :sweat:

but thanks

You can be anonymous in the Prayer Room, I believe. I don't think any less of you, Alice. XD You seem like quite the awesome girl. Everyone has their problems -- I know I have mine. Being able to come out in the open like this is quite admirable.

PostPosted: Thu Jun 02, 2005 7:25 pm
by Mr. SmartyPants
*points to my signature*

keep that in mind!

PostPosted: Thu Jun 02, 2005 7:25 pm
by Mangafanatic
People who were once alcoholics often have to stay far away from establishments that sell alcohol. Likewise, people who've worked through addictions to pornographic often have to have stringent internet perimeters set up to protect them from themselves. Likewise, anyone who's been a compulsive eater under stress is probably still going to have days, even after repenting and turning from the sin of gluttony, when they're under pressure and they open the refridgerator without even thinking about it. The Bible tells us that there's a war within us between the old man and the new man. That battle is always there. With that said, it is possible that this issue is one which you will struggle with through some portion of your life.

We all struggle with some sin, even if ours is different from yours. I struggle with patience, and there will always be the voice of my old nature trying to get me to lash out in anger in moments of stress, but that doesn't mean we have to give in. You seem to be taking good steps by avoiding what triggers your draw to this specific sin. And that's something you should be proud of. Don't be embarrassed to share this with us. You've let the Spirit overcome a powerful stronghold in your life. That is something that we, your christian brothers and sisters, love celebrating with you over. Furthermore, now that we know what some of your stumbling blocks are, we can help you in your fight against them!

PostPosted: Thu Jun 02, 2005 7:41 pm
by Mave
If it makes you feel any better, I've got myself into stuff like yaoi and hentai in my teen years. To make it worse, I used to draw perversions.

I still struggle with perverted thoughts up to this day and can't deny that it can be very difficult to the point of feeling hopeless. Personally, I think you can still enjoy anime and manga. Your choices are just going to be different from some Christian fans.

About DNAngel? I know exactly what you mean. It's not official but the subtle 'fanservice' make me uncomfortable enough to give it up. Some fans may not sense anything from those panels but I know I feel :eyebrow:. Feel free to discuss anime titles you are unsure of because there are many slashable titles. From what I understand, these titles potentially seem shonen-ai but never state it officially.

(^___^) Among the most important steps in dealing with this is admitting it. It's nice to know that you're not alone.

PostPosted: Thu Jun 02, 2005 8:41 pm
by Ashley
While I can't say anything more fitting than what Mave, Osaka, and others have wrote, I can tell you this about your anonymous problem:

When you really don't feel comfortable posting under your own name, you can always post in the prayer forum. I know it may not get as much attention that way, but that's really the only forum we could allow anonymous postings in. Otherwise there'd be no way to keep track of trolls or keep them at bay.

Another option would be to PM close friends or those you trust for advice to ask for help privately.

PostPosted: Fri Jun 03, 2005 12:14 am
by Fsiphskilm
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