CAA: Christian Anime Alliance

No, this is NOT a goof-off thread but a serious one. For some time I've been suspecting that I'm a bore. I bore people to death. How do you suggest I make myself more interesting? Or at least less of a bore?

Loud ties. Bright colours. Bling.

Has someone actually told you this? What makes you suspect it?

I don't know. In recent months I haven't had much to talk with with my friends. We get together and talks a little but mostly we don't say much. I find this frustrating. I try to think of something to discuss and nothing comes up.

I feel exactly the same way as you, muh man. I really need to stop IMing people.

I know how you feel, the mental blank out mid-conversation happens to me alot. And then I'm left sitting there going; 'think of something to say! thinkthinkTHINK!!' it usually ends with an awkward silence or me saying something completely weird and random. It can get pretty frustrating and at times I've wondered if I'm boring to be around (I've also been ditched by a number of friends, which doesn't help). It's also the pits because I'm rather phone-phobic as a result of my conversational struggles, though I have apparently been getting better.

It's only been recently that I've placed this issue in God's hands. Instead of blaming myself, I try to think of it as a wall in my mind that is blocking me off from opening up to people. Maybe that's a weird way to handle it, but it kinda helps me not to feel down about it. I've also been praying alot. In the end, I'm not sure how much I can really change the fact that I am an introvert. I guess on the bright side, I'm definitely pretty good at listening. And actually, can you imagine if the world was full of extroverts? That really might not end well..

Oh! I know. You can travel around with an entourage of cheerleaders....

Ah, don't worry about it. The most interesting discussion topic always surfaces when you're not looking for it.

Come join my club. Except, in my case, it's not that I can't think of anything to say. What happens to me is I start talking about something I think is interesting, and I won't stop for quite a while. It really bores the people around me quite a bit. People just stop listening after the first few seconds, and my friends know to ignore most of what I say completely. What I should really do is just shut up and listen to what others have to say first. Two ears, one mouth.

VioletEyedCat wrote:Come join my club. Except, in my case, it's not that I can't think of anything to say. What happens to me is I start talking about something I think is interesting, and I won't stop for quite a while. It really bores the people around me quite a bit. People just stop listening after the first few seconds, and my friends know to ignore most of what I say completely. What I should really do is just shut up and listen to what others have to say first. Two ears, one mouth.

LOL sometimes its nice to know someone who talks alot lol I like people like that, they make me feel more comfortable with talking.

i dont think you're boring... i think im quite boring too... in person i mean

I haven't got to chat with you much, but I don't think you are boring.

It's always uncomfortable wondering if people are bored around you. I live alone with not too much interaction with people outside of work, so when I do, I tend to talk a lot and get some strange looks and find myself wondering what to do.

About the only thing I've found is when I'm talking and the listener is not responding, it might be time to change topics or slow down.

Not much help, I know, but I think I have a blind spot here and it's hard to diagnose yourself...

I was feeling a bit down when I posted, re-evaluated myself and I think I'm not that much of a bore but I really should try to do something exciting. Not that I'm going to start doing anything silly like joining the circus.

I know I'm a bit of a bore myself. I am generally content with the silences that most find uncomfortable. Most of my friends understand this about me (I think) and adjust to my, a-hem, eccentricities. Every once and a while, though, I do something completely random. It helps break up tension and gets a good laugh going.

termyt wrote:I know I'm a bit of a bore myself. I am generally content with the silences that most find uncomfortable. Most of my friends understand this about me (I think) and adjust to my, a-hem, eccentricities. Every once and a while, though, I do something completely random. It helps break up tension and gets a good laugh going.

I do too many random things in those instances and I think it gets on their nerves. But I too am comfortable with silence.

Silence is golden...
But my eyes still see
Silence is golden, golden...

bigsleepj wrote:I was feeling a bit down when I posted, re-evaluated myself and I think I'm not that much of a bore but I really should try to do something exciting. Not that I'm going to start doing anything silly like joining the circus.

Join the circus? Hey, that wouldn't be such a bad option if I wasn't so scared of heights or big animals.

But no seriously, it's good to hear that you're feeling better. Everyone is made special by God so in my opinion, no one is boring. If we think so, it's most probable that we are the blind ones who fail to see God's creativity in an individual. Just my two cents.