is it wrong not to be happy??

[Hitokiri]

I was wondering if it's wrong not to be happy. I mean as a Christian we should be filled with joy and all. But half of the time, me personally, I'm not all that happy. I'm a Christian of course but I just don't express happiness like most people do. In fact I hardly express happiness. If I do it's usually just fake or just...like...manditory. It's a fun or happy situation so I should be happy. But I've never felt true happiness. As some know I strruggle with depression but for this matter I dont think thats the case.

I guess its cause of my personality. A liad-back, not really caring type personality which then maybe attributes to my depression problem so that I just dont feel happy most of the time.

Sure thiers times where I do feel happy but thiers always this feeling inside that it wont last long and that makes me sink deeper and deeper.

So my question is, is that is it wrong not to feel true happiness every time. Am I not a Christian cause I'm not happy 24/7 or even like once a week. I just dont feel happiness.

[Ssjjvash]

No, I don't believe you aren't a Christian because you aren't happy. One of my family members is pretty laid back too and barely ever shows if he's like really happy. I don't think happiness stays all the time either.

My mom says that depression is a sin however. She used to tell me that all the time because I was depressed.
If you don't feel the joy of the Lord, it may be the cause of backsliding--not saying you are or anything, but I encourage you to put God first every day and if you are really struggling with this, then pray and maybe go to your pastors and parents about it. Maybe they can help too.

[ClosetOtaku]

I think the "Man of Sorrows" would agree that, yes, a constant state of happiness is not mandatory.

There are some people who are constantly happy (or appear constantly happy); that is fine for them. Do not judge them. By the same token, you should not be judged by others when you are not constantly happy.

I see no Biblical basis for being constantly happy. "Rejoice in the Lord always", indeed, but your private joy in God need not translate to a false smile on your face. I can't imagine Paul, nearing the end of his life, writing "I am being poured out like a drink offering", smiling giddily.

Just a word of advice (I am over twice your age): the constant, nagging feeling that "the other shoe is going to drop" (i.e. something bad will happen, or this happy feeling won't last long) is not something I would pay much attention to. I've been believing that longer than you've been alive... and it hasn't happened yet. At least, nothing so bad that I would despair of life. God is faithful.

Finally, if you believe you may be depressed, I would talk with a health care professional about it. Maybe you are, maybe you aren't. There is no sin in discovering you have an underlying metabolic condition that affects your emotional health and getting treated for it.

[Ashley]

In additon to the reference ClosetOtaku made to the "man of sorrows", consider also David. David was called a man after God's own heart, yet read his psalms: many are written in times of deep sorrow, depression, desperateness and brokenness. His son, Solomon, also dealth with depression--"everything is meaningless" doesn't translate to the model 24/7 joy Christian does it?

I think the important thing is not that you're brimming with happiness at all times, but instead remember some biblical truths:
1. God is still God and He still loves you; He will bring you from the depths of your sorrow into the light of his goodness and grace again
2. sorrow and tough times happen for a reason. James said to rejoice when you are tried because patience is born of suffering
3. God didn't call us to be happy all the time, but he did call us to praise him in all times--our faith need not be dependent on our circumstances
4. I don't remember the exact verse, but I do remember one speaking of sharing in the burden of Christ so that we may share also in his reward.

So, to reiterate, it's not that God expects you to never have grief or suffering--he wants you to respond to them in a Christian manner, however.

[Hitokiri]

Finally, if you believe you may be depressed, I would talk with a health care professional about it. Maybe you are, maybe you aren't. There is no sin in discovering you have an underlying metabolic condition that affects your emotional health and getting treated for it.

Not sure if I pointed out earlier that I've been depressed ever since I can remember. It's not like a extreme depression such as suicide (though I did battle that for a while) but it's like a little kid hanging on your pants everey day. I just deal with it and try to hide it and appear happy.

I do experience joy and happiness but it's just not that much.

I love to worship and I do it full-heartdly. I do devotionals, pray, and read the Bible (not trying to say I do those and I should be happy). I love God with my Heart and I try to live for him. I've been doing good with my spiritual walk with God then anytime before.

But it's always been there...this saddness alongside with my depression.

It's kinda hard to explain. I just dont feel happiness as much as other Christians do.

Also certain stuff triggers this saddness I guess. For instance if I watch something sad or something that affects me personally thats negative happens or sometimes I just wake up with it. Usually when this happens its worst then before.

I just finished watching End of Evangelion (just got it ::sigh::) Maybe that swhy I'm kinda down right (good thing I'm going to a Youth Group Lock-In..that should cheer me up I guess)

sorry if I sound like I'm complaining .... I just wanted to know that I'm bad or wrong for not being happy alot.

[Ssjjvash]

One thing you shouldn't do when you're feeling depressed is put up with it--especially if it's been going on for a long time. (I speak from experience)
Your words have power, so you can confess that you have the joy of the Lord, for you walk by faith and not by sight or feelings!

Proverbs 6:2 says, "Thou art snared with the words of thy mouth, thou art taken with the words of thy mouth."

Pr. 18:21 says, "Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof."

Hope this helps! God bless you.

[EireWolf]

Hitokiri, you're not bad or wrong or non-Christian for not being constantly happy. Almost nobody is 100% happy "all the time." However, it isn't normal to be depressed constantly either. I think it could be a chemical imbalance, especially if the depression has lasted for as long as you can remember. You should see a doctor about it; medication is very helpful to some people.

There is nothing sinful about being chemically depressed. But there may be something you can do about it. It doesn't help for people to say, "Just be joyful!" But it may help to see a doctor. And it sure couldn't hurt to pray about it.

[Swordguy]

i don't know waht going on realy but i will pray.

[PumpkinKoRn52]

Dude, it aint wrong to feel bad. You've just woken up too the downsides of life. I know. I'm never happy. I have fun, but I'm not happy. The only time I'll probably ever be happy is when I'm in heaven, but that could take awhile. God has a plan for me. Tjhat's what keeps me going. I don't know what it is, but I will someday. And it's worth it enough not to cut life short. Not saying you're suicidal or nothing, but trust me, speaking from the voice of experience, suicide aint worth it. Life may suck for us, but we have to learn to cope. To qoute Pink Floyd, "I have become, comfortably numb." Not the best state I could be in, but still, God has a plan for me. He has one for you to. This is just a state in time, and there will be day's when you find true happines. May they come sooner to you than they will to me.

[Yojimbo]

Of course it's not wrong to not feel happy 24/7. We're humans we don't exactly live in a paradise like heaven. If someone was happy go lucky all the time I would think they were ODing on anti-depressants. And if you feel depressed like all the time you might want to consider if you have clinical depression. I used to believe I had clinical depression but I figured out it was...other things like putting God out of my life, but that's not the only reason. But like I said look up some info on depression and maybe talk to your parents about it if you think you need to.

[b0redx3]

I don't think 'depression' defines if you are a christian or not. We are human beings. We don't have the strength to be able to get rid of depression with a snap of a finger. Christianity is to follow Jesus's way. I doubt God would condemn you just because you are often depressed. But I do advice you to pray if you WANT to be rid of this depression. God WANT you to be HAPPY.. to be joyous. Not see you suffer. If you know and believe that Jesus can get rid of this, you will be rid of it. Have faith my fellow brother. =]

I for once been through depression before, like 2-3 years ago. It seems that everything i see or do.. or watever, i would have a negative thoughts about it. During those years I would say to myself that I can be alone.. I will be fine alone. I wasn't a strong christian than, so i did not pray about my problem. But as my faith and hope of the Lord grew, somehow my depression decipated. I just want to say that it happens to people... but Jesus will be there for you, if you think that no one else is. Don't let darkness take over your road in Christ.

[Hitokiri]

thanks, what everyone has sad helped me alot.

I was thinking alot bout this and I do have fun and I am happy...kinda of a surpressed happy. Not like som epeople who are just bursting with ethusiamsm and happiness and sunshine and rainbows (thos epeople scare me).

I guess thats just how I am and God made me to be.

[Fsiphskilm]

[b]This who

[RoyalWing]

^ Go Volt! ^-^

...you already got my opinion, and you've made up your mind already. I am happy that your problem was a bit solved. I think you're just a serious person, and that's alright! ^v^

[Mave]

It really depends on how you define happy ----> always smiling? laughing all the time?

Although many friends tell me that that's how they perceive me, I would rather be at peace. However, God has graced me with His joy at times and it's at those times, when I go around smiling like a crazy person saying God is Amazing. But that doesn't happen all the time. ^_^

That doesn't say I haven't experienced negative feelings, of course, there are times when I feel down and discouraged but I wouldn't describe that as "depressed". As long as I keep turning my eyes back to Jesus and focus on other ppl's needs, I see hope and meaning in my life.

[ally-san]

u sound like me so hopefully i can help.
i try not to let myself sink cuz i do let it happen sometimes. when i get down on myself or just dont feel happy i wonder y i feel like that too. ur not alone w/ this. u know something that helps me get out of my little moods? instead of thinking about myself i ask God to use me to help others so i can take the focus off myself. i think as teenagers or young adults we focus on ourselves so much that we notice things that we really shouldnt care about or worry about. i get mad at myself sometimes cuz i wish i could be a happier person. i'm not naturally caring or sensitive so its hard to have a "christian" attitude, but i think if u really look into ur heart and ask God to give u a compassionate heart i think that God can change u. i know part of it is my personality but some of it is also just being a teenager. i think u'll get out of this rut and i'm still working on it too. just know that ur not alone with feeling this way and it doesnt make u any less of a christian, but it doesnt hurt to have joy in ur heart. as christians we should whether it shows on the outside or not. just think of all God's blessings and and try to teach urself not to think negatively cuz i know from myself i'm a very negative person. i think a big part of it is satan too cuz if u think about it joy is the opposite of what he wants u to feel. i know its frustrating but dont let urself fall into it or u will get depressed. rejoice for Jesus is Lord and cuz he loves u!

[Raiden no Kishi]

I know exactly how you feel, Hitokiri.

I'm pretty laid back myself, and so I'm usually serious. I'll laugh with a friend about funny things, but I try to maintain an air of sanity about me ^_~. The obstacle is that my mom is really goofy a lot, and thinks that somehow, my expressing frustration or despair is wrong. She won't say that, but that's what her actions say. I can't vent my frustrations with her because she just gets angry with me. That, and when she's being silly, and I think she sounds kind of childish, she thinks I'm being grumpy. I'm not a grumpy person, I'm a rational, quiet, reserved person, and I don't appreciate childishness.

I know how you feel, d00d. We should talk on AIM tongiht or tomorrow. ^_^

Rai

[termyt]

I like what ally-san said there, she shows some good wisdom. The teenage years are a great place to find depression since it is the time of our lives most of us come to realize that we are not as important to the world as we once thought we were. As children, our world revolved around us. We sought after our own needs and they were filled. When we start hitting adulthood, there are less people trying to fill our needs as we take responsibility for our own lives and make our own choices. We begin to question just what the meaning of our life is.

That's an easy question, by the way. It's a wonder why we spend so much effort trying to find it. The meaning of life is this: Love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, and spirit, and love your neighbor as yourself. Focus on serving God and serving others and the questions fade away.

As for not being happy, that's no worry. I am not an emotional person. I neither feel nor display a very wide range of emotion. Don't get me wrong, I feel all emotions - happiness, sadness, anger, jealousy, etc, but I do not usually have the emotional extremes that most people seem to, it's much more muted with me. This is a turn off to some and I am constantly asked "What's wrong" even when I am perfectly happy and content. Don't let it get to you. Be who you are and allow God to use you.

All that said, I maintain a very high level of joy. Joy is not an emotion, it is a state of being. I spend each day in the loving arms of my savior, and each day I am washed in His love and made clean by His grace. Someday, I will meet Him face to face and He will say to me, "Welcome home, beloved." That knowledge fills me up with a joy no depression can overcome, or even hide.

Depression, on the other hand is nothing to fool with or ignore. It can lead to serious emotional problems, so if you are truly depressed, talk to someone. It may be chemical or it may be emotional. Perhaps you just need to become comfortable with the fact you process emotions differently than others.

That was long, but boy did it feel good to write it. I'm having a very bad week here at work, but writing that reminded me of my Savior, and now my joy is renewed once more. Thank you for the opportunity, and Jesus, thank You for Your mercy.

[ally-san]

thanks termyt. u really finished off what i had to say.

[That Dude]

Termyte has it down pat. Just remember that it's all about God. This can be really hard especially when your depressed but it helps. You should just shrug off what people tell you about how if your a christian you should be happy all the time. God meets us where were at and loves you (and us) more than anyone could possibly imagine. God'll use this and you'll be a great witness to other's who are dealing with the same thing if you'll let him. One more thing. You need to keep in fellowship with your christian friends...God made us to be social and the more you're around people and helping them and letting them help you, the more you'll grow. If you ever need to just vent about it or anything feel free to PM me. I've never been all to depressed but I know a lot about it because I've grown up surrounded by people who struggle with it a lot. Well...Just remember we're here for you man.

[agasfas]

Wow talk about grave-digging.... ***Looks up***

anyways, about your qeustion about "So my question is, is that is it wrong not to feel true happiness every time. Am I not a Christian cause I'm not happy 24/7 or even like once a week. I just dont feel happiness."

Everyone one of us feels that way at one time or another. I fought depression for many years, and although I have beaten it, the thoughts of it come back every so often. I just don't let it get the best of me. I really want to say something philosophical, but I'm not much with words. I know times can be hard, but just have faith in Jesus. Here come my most used, favorite quotes about going through hard times:

Isaiah 43:2 When thou passest through the waters, I will be with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee.

and

1 Peter 5:7 cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

Trust in Jesus, he only wants best for us. Satan does not like to see the children of God happy and joyful. Satan will do whatever he can to hurt and deter us away from God. Anytime you need to talk, feel free to PM me. Hope you are feeling better now seeing it's been about 3-4months ago.

[Fsiphskilm]

On the other hand... God wants us to