Don't know what to do
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Don't know what to do
I am so confused right now. I have been friends with this guy for a few months and he has liked me for a great majority of that time. On Wednesday last week he broke up with his girlfriend. He then told me on the bus that day that he really liked me and wanted to kiss me, so he gave me a tiny little kiss on the lips, which was really sweet. The next day, he asked me out and so we have been going out for almost a week now. He is very sweet and loving and I like him, but I don't love him like he loves me. I kinda feel like I should break up with him because I don't feel right with him, you know? But I don't want to hurt him because he really loves me and is always telling me I'm really awesome. I don't want to break up with him because I don't want to hurt him, i mean he broke up with his girlfriend who he really liked just to be with me. but I also don't want to stay with him because it might seem like I am just leading him on and then I would feel horrible. Any advice?
[color="Purple"][/color][font="Franklin Gothic Medium"]Everything happens for a reason, and every reason brings you closer to a better and brighter future~[/font]
[font="Book Antiqua"]"[color="Red"]Love is patient, love is kind, love is not jealous, it does not boast, it does not become conceited, it does not behave dishonorably, it is not selfish, it does not become angry, it does not keep a record of wrongs, it does not rejoice at unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth, bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things[/color]."[/font]
[font="Book Antiqua"]"[color="Red"]Love is patient, love is kind, love is not jealous, it does not boast, it does not become conceited, it does not behave dishonorably, it is not selfish, it does not become angry, it does not keep a record of wrongs, it does not rejoice at unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth, bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things[/color]."[/font]
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Fangirl4God - Posts: 44
- Joined: Mon Sep 27, 2010 4:49 pm
- Location: Alfredica! That's good ole America for those of you who do not watch Hetalia~
First of all, if you like him, but you're uncomfortable because you don't like him as much as he likes you, it's perfectly okay for you to tell him this is all moving too fast and you need a bit of a breather.
Just because one side of the relationship feels a bit more intensely than the other does not mean it's doomed to failure. It just means you're not the same person. If I were you, I'd do my best to be honest with him, as kindly as possible.
You also shouldn't feel pressured to stay with him JUST BECAUSE he likes you a lot and broke up with his girlfriend to be with you. Liking somebody because you feel like you have to is not exactly the foundation of a healthy relationship.
If it were me, I'd talk to people who know both of us and ask what they thought. Also, making a pros and cons list might be a helpful exercise in stepping back and looking at the relationship objectively.
Remember, dating somebody does not equal being with them for the rest of time, so it's okay for you to not quite know how you feel just yet. Just take it easy, take it slow, and relax. I know that's hard to do when your emotions are swirling around like a hurricane, but you don't have to be 100% sure about anything at this point. Just be honest about how you feel. If he's worth keeping around, he'll be willing to understand that.
EDIT: It is a bit of a warning flag, though, that he broke up with his girlfriend just to be with you. Were there other reasons behind it? What concerns me here is that if he did it once, it's quite possible he'd do it again, and you'd be on the wrong side of it that time.
Just because one side of the relationship feels a bit more intensely than the other does not mean it's doomed to failure. It just means you're not the same person. If I were you, I'd do my best to be honest with him, as kindly as possible.
You also shouldn't feel pressured to stay with him JUST BECAUSE he likes you a lot and broke up with his girlfriend to be with you. Liking somebody because you feel like you have to is not exactly the foundation of a healthy relationship.
If it were me, I'd talk to people who know both of us and ask what they thought. Also, making a pros and cons list might be a helpful exercise in stepping back and looking at the relationship objectively.
Remember, dating somebody does not equal being with them for the rest of time, so it's okay for you to not quite know how you feel just yet. Just take it easy, take it slow, and relax. I know that's hard to do when your emotions are swirling around like a hurricane, but you don't have to be 100% sure about anything at this point. Just be honest about how you feel. If he's worth keeping around, he'll be willing to understand that.
EDIT: It is a bit of a warning flag, though, that he broke up with his girlfriend just to be with you. Were there other reasons behind it? What concerns me here is that if he did it once, it's quite possible he'd do it again, and you'd be on the wrong side of it that time.
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Yuki-Anne - Posts: 1637
- Joined: Thu Aug 10, 2006 10:33 am
- Location: Japan
I'm with Yuki, especially on her last point. He just broke up with his girlfriend almost a week ago. He's on the rebound. You can still be his friend but right now distance is probably the best advice for both of you.
K. Ayato: What happens if you press the small red button?
*Explosion goes off in the movie*
mechana2015: Does that answer your question?
K. Ayato: Perfectly.
Prayer sister of kaji, sticksabuser, Angel37, and Doubleshadow --Love you guys!
*Explosion goes off in the movie*
mechana2015: Does that answer your question?
K. Ayato: Perfectly.
Prayer sister of kaji, sticksabuser, Angel37, and Doubleshadow --Love you guys!
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K. Ayato - Posts: 3881
- Joined: Wed Dec 08, 2004 10:00 am
- Location: Southern California
Oh yeah. I was a victim of rebound, and I only met the guy two months AFTER his breakup. Rebound'll do horrible things to ya.
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Yuki-Anne - Posts: 1637
- Joined: Thu Aug 10, 2006 10:33 am
- Location: Japan
That was also something I took into consideration. Thank you for your advice, and I agree. I do want a relationship with him, but I don't know if boyfriend and girlfriend is right for the two of us.
[color="Purple"][/color][font="Franklin Gothic Medium"]Everything happens for a reason, and every reason brings you closer to a better and brighter future~[/font]
[font="Book Antiqua"]"[color="Red"]Love is patient, love is kind, love is not jealous, it does not boast, it does not become conceited, it does not behave dishonorably, it is not selfish, it does not become angry, it does not keep a record of wrongs, it does not rejoice at unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth, bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things[/color]."[/font]
[font="Book Antiqua"]"[color="Red"]Love is patient, love is kind, love is not jealous, it does not boast, it does not become conceited, it does not behave dishonorably, it is not selfish, it does not become angry, it does not keep a record of wrongs, it does not rejoice at unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth, bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things[/color]."[/font]
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Fangirl4God - Posts: 44
- Joined: Mon Sep 27, 2010 4:49 pm
- Location: Alfredica! That's good ole America for those of you who do not watch Hetalia~
As Yuki said, take it slow. Whatever you do, take it slow, pray a lot, take it slow, pray some more, oh and take it slow. I've seen so many relationship ruined because people haven't done these two things.
And I'd also have to caution you as a guy, usually if the dude leaves somebody to be with you, you should be really careful and watchful around the guy. I'm not saying that it's always bad leaving a person for another, but usually it shows a lack of commitment on us guys part and is a BIG warning sign. So keep that in mind.
And I'd also have to caution you as a guy, usually if the dude leaves somebody to be with you, you should be really careful and watchful around the guy. I'm not saying that it's always bad leaving a person for another, but usually it shows a lack of commitment on us guys part and is a BIG warning sign. So keep that in mind.
I am convinced that many men who preach the gospel and love the Lord are really misunderstood. People make a “profession,â€
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That Dude - Posts: 5226
- Joined: Sat Oct 04, 2003 4:00 am
- Location: Where I can see mountains.
I agree with Yuki. Also, you must learn that you are allowed to be fair to yourself. Don't do what isn't comfortable to you!
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Mr. SmartyPants - Posts: 12541
- Joined: Sat Aug 21, 2004 9:00 am
I think you should give this some time. Also, communication is key here. You should be honest when sharing your feelings with him.
Breaking up the same day he entered a relationship with you is somewhat peculiar. Knowing what happened will probably determine what he's thinking, and if he's really trying to love you or if he's just a player.
Breaking up the same day he entered a relationship with you is somewhat peculiar. Knowing what happened will probably determine what he's thinking, and if he's really trying to love you or if he's just a player.
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Hiryu - Posts: 457
- Joined: Fri Sep 03, 2010 8:09 pm
- Location: Pansey,AL
My advice? Listen to Yuki-Anne. She said everything I was going to propose, and more.
Oh, and PRAYYYYY...
Oh, and PRAYYYYY...
Beneath the Tangles: Where Manga Meets the Maker
In the colors of Your goodness/In the scars that mark your skin/In the currency of Grace/Is where my song begins
~ "Economy of Mercy," Switchfoot
In the colors of Your goodness/In the scars that mark your skin/In the currency of Grace/Is where my song begins
~ "Economy of Mercy," Switchfoot
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TWWK - Posts: 610
- Joined: Mon Sep 13, 2010 12:34 pm
- Location: Texas
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