Moving forward with my life

[Shellz]

I'll try not to make this long, but I said in my newbie thread that my life has been pretty crazy lately.

In a nutshell, I'm currently separated from my husband of 5 years. Back in August I had a miscarriage, a couple of weeks later we had an argument because I felt like he wasn't supporting me through the grief. He got mad and left. We had a few weeks of supposedly working on it; during which I ended up pregnant again, but one day he texted me (lame) and said he missed me, but wasn't dealing with everything well and couldn't handle seeing me. He said he didn't want not talking to be forever, but a couple of weeks after that conversation I found out he started seeing someone at a new job he'd started. We were living in the UK, but considering he was all I had there (his family completely cut me out of their life when he went to stay with them after the initial argument) I booked a flight the same day I found out and moved back to FL to stay with my mom a few days later.

I know he's been involved with at least one other woman. His personality has completely changed in all of this. We're no longer communicating, but he was previously adamant about wanting a divorce and me out of his life. He never grieved the miscarriage and honestly I think it made something snap in him, but I'm now past analyzing and making excuses for his actions.

My world has completely been turned upside down. It's been a struggle, but I'm desperate to get out of the dark place. Part of joining this site was to get back into something I've always enjoyed.

I still pray for my husband as a person and for my marriage, though it feels over and it working out would honestly be a miracle. But beyond that I would just appreciate prayers for the strength to move forward, find happiness again, and be able to cope with more than likely being a single mom and whatever else God has in store for me.

[anlptgtsg]

praying.

[Sheenar]

Praying!

[shooraijin]

Wow, that's a really heavy burden to carry. Is it likely to become a divorce?

[Shellz]

Wow, that's a really heavy burden to carry. Is it likely to become a divorce?

It has been a struggle :0(

As far as a divorce, I really don't know. He was previously adamant about it. In the UK we'd have to be separated for 2 years in order for him to file and I could file here in a few months, but even with everything I don't want to go that route. It's all just up in the air because since finding out about the first person, it's just been a lot of anger and running away on his part. I haven't heard from him in over a month and I've stopped reaching out because it was only leaving me more hurt. I don't even know if he's going to be involved with the baby...With the silence on his end that's why I just want to try refocusing as if I will just be on my own. I believe God's in control so I pray at some point I'll have answers.

[Makachop^^128]

Will be praying.

[ADXC]

Oh man, that's a lot to deal with. I do pray that you can find comfort in the midst of these trials and for help in possibly becoming a single mom if your husband wishes for divorce.


I am happy that you decided to join CAA and to allow us to help carry that burden. I know neither of us can be there for you physically, but we can be present mentally and spiritually. These are tough life issues, none of which I've had to deal with so I cannot say anything that can amount to the struggles you've faced and are currently facing; however, I do empathize(not sympathize since I haven't gone through any of these issues) with you and your plight. Don't be a stranger here and I'm glad you have a place to go to relay your feelings and prayer requests on these things. I'm praying for you and take care.

[Shellz]

I really appreciate the prayers.

Yesterday I found out I'm having a little girl. That's what I wanted so I am so very thankful. But experiencing that milestone on my own has put me back into an emotional slump. I haven't felt this low in a while. I know and am thankful that in the long run this trial will make me a much stronger person and a great mom, but it's just hard to endure some days.

[Atria35]

Praying.

Are there any local support groups in your area for single parents? If there's one, I think it would help a lot since you'd be able to get ideas and support on raising your child, whether or not you end up alone during it. If the father's not going to be involved, you'll need all the support and advice they can give.

[SnEptUne]

"And he said to them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her,
if she divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.” (Mark 10:11)

Divorce is a serious matter and it means breaking an oath against God. I will pray for your husband so that he will come to understand God and will not sin against Him.

[Atria35]

^ Biblical law allows for divorce when adultery has already happened, if it's already gone that far. But there are also Christians who don't believe divorce is sinful. So whatever the case may be for OP, I'm hoping for the best.

[Shellz]

In terms of support groups there isn't anything near me and I don't have a car at the moment so I'm a bit stuck there. As well as that, even though given the current circumstances it is more than likely that I will be a single mom, it's still very overwhelming for me to put too much focus on that. Moving back here has brought other issues, so I have more than just my marriage and the pregnancy to deal with. With having so much on my plate taking it one day at a time is all I can manage without driving myself crazy. When the baby is here I will have to push myself more, but I have a few months left before that.

In terms of the whole divorce thing, just randomly divorcing is not something I agree with, but obviously he is carrying on like a single guy with no responsibilities right now. It's getting harder for me to even pray for him and I can't say I feel love or anything really towards him. I would work on it if he miraculously came around, but he's no longer my focus. Regardless of how things end up, God allowed this situation for a reason so I'm just trusting in his plan.