Yep I suck

[Nate]

I'm 32, I have a dead-end job that is making me miserable and I have nothing of value regarding my life. I merely exist because if I didn't my family would miss me. I mean not that I want to not exist anymore because there's things I like but my existence is taking its toll.

I can't stand my job, I know nobody likes their job but I feel so stressed out and I don't know how to handle it. I'm bad at handling stress I guess, I'm just not that strong. My job pays very little but I need it, I can't quit. If I quit then I go back to being broke and being a financial leech on my mom, and that stresses her out and I can't put her through that, so I have to be miserable and endure this hell because there's no other option. I either make her miserable or make myself miserable and she doesn't deserve to be miserable, only I do.

There's nothing I can do. I'm trapped. Unless it turns out I have a long lost uncle who died and left me his fortune or a really rich girl falls for me and wants to marry me and is okay with me not having a job, I can't do anything except keep ****** barely above minimum wage jobs that aren't enough for me to get a place of my own thus forcing me to live with my mom the rest of my life.

I don't know how to deal with it. I feel like I'm going crazy, I feel like I can't take it, I feel like I'm being destroyed from the inside and I can't stop it, I can't, there's nothing I can do, I'm powerless and weak and just...nothing. I am nothing. I have no legacy, and no importance. My family would mourn my death, and a couple of people on the internet would be sad if they found out (though it's doubtful they would ever find out, they'd just go "I wonder what happened to that Nate guy I haven't seen him in a long time" since there'd be no real way for them to know), but outside of that, I have no value. That just depresses me even more. I know that being considered important after you're dead doesn't really matter (because you're dead and you can't really care) but what I mean is that it just reinforces that I suck. I'm not even good enough to mean anything except to a small handful of people who really only love me because of carrying similar DNA rather than deserving it.

Everything sucks. Nothing is good.

[Atria35]

I don't think that there are many people that don't hit a point like this in their lives.

While I know jobs don't often leave extra time for whatever, are there any local clubs/groups around your area you could join? For instance, I've taken up cards at the local women's club, and have been getting involved in community projects because of it. I've been feeling at a loss because I haven't been able to find a job, and this makes me feel a lot more useful and important (even moreso since I'm the youngest - most of the members are over 70!) Even if you can't afford a place of your own, could you start looking for one with a roommate?

I'm sure there are options out there, but it can be hard to find them!

[AdriTan]

I echo Atria also I would try putting applications to other jobs before you quit. Keep working, but stick your resume all over the place and who knows? You may just find what you need! Jobs might not be über plentiful, but they are out there. I'm praying for ya! And always remember that to Jesus you were worth everything to Him! That's all the worth you need! And more worth than you can imagine!

[shooraijin]

I don't have anything to say other than I'm really sorry to hear it, and I mean that honestly.

[sarahjoy78]

I'm praying for you that Gd will help you in your life right now. I know a lot of people going through similar problems, Some of my parents friends in fact. Whenever you feel upset about your job, try not to think of the negative side. Remeber why you have that job in the first place. You have a job to provide for you and as you said your family. Your job provides the money that you need to live and even have fun. Things will get better my friend. Remember, don't bring yourself down when God can lift you up.
Philipians 4:13 ~ I can do all things through the Lord who strengthens me. (:


<3 GOD BLESS YOU , Your sister in Christ, Sarah <3

[SilverToast]

Praying!
I echo what adritan said. To Jesus you are worth his life. It doesn't seem like a good idea to base your worth or self esteem off of what others think of you or what you do. I know from experience.
Remember that you are a person who Jesus died for and loves.

Adding to what Atria suggested, it is a good idea to volunteer and be charitable in helping others. If you don't feel good why not make someone else feel better. Give with good intention and heart and you'll feel the blessed. It really helps to do that when someone is down.

Have hope and pray and believe things will be better. Look toward Jesus Christ. Things will get better.

[Xeno]

I echo Atria also I would try putting applications to other jobs before you quit. Keep working, but stick your resume all over the place and who knows? You may just find what you need! Jobs might not be über plentiful, but they are out there. I'm praying for ya! And always remember that to Jesus you were worth everything to Him! That's all the worth you need! And more worth than you can imagine!

I'm praying for you that Gd will help you in your life right now. I know a lot of people going through similar problems, Some of my parents friends in fact. Whenever you feel upset about your job, try not to think of the negative side. Remeber why you have that job in the first place. You have a job to provide for you and as you said your family. Your job provides the money that you need to live and even have fun. Things will get better my friend. Remember, don't bring yourself down when God can lift you up.
Philipians 4:13 ~ I can do all things through the Lord who strengthens me. (:


<3 GOD BLESS YOU , Your sister in Christ, Sarah <3

Praying!
I echo what adritan said. To Jesus you are worth his life. It doesn't seem like a good idea to base your worth or self esteem off of what others think of you or what you do. I know from experience.
Remember that you are a person who Jesus died for and loves.

Adding to what Atria suggested, it is a good idea to volunteer and be charitable in helping others. If you don't feel good why not make someone else feel better. Give with good intention and heart and you'll feel the blessed. It really helps to do that when someone is down.

Have hope and pray and believe things will be better. Look toward Jesus Christ. Things will get better.

I know you guys are just trying to help, and I'm sure Nate appreciates that. But if I were Nate, I think I'd find people half my age giving me life experience stories as a way to tell me to keep carrying on to be a bit condescending. I'm pretty sure Nate already knows all these things.

Now onto the actual point of the thread:

I'm 32, I have a dead-end job that is making me miserable and I have nothing of value regarding my life. I merely exist because if I didn't my family would miss me. I mean not that I want to not exist anymore because there's things I like but my existence is taking its toll.

I'll start off by saying I'm very sorry that you're in such a dark place right now Nate. I'd like to say I know where you're at because I've been in some dead end jobs before where I felt like my value was nothing, but I can't honestly say I can equate my experience to your own since everyone goes through things differently. In regards to merely existing for the sake of your family, why is that necessarily a bad thing? Ultimately, what more is there to exist for other than for yourself and family (be it parents, siblings, spouse and/or children if you eventually should choose to pursue that option)? Living for possessions is relatively empty, living for money specifically tends to corrupt people. I absolutely understand that life feels it's becoming a heavy burden, but I don't understand what more you would be looking for for fulfillment.

I can't stand my job, I know nobody likes their job but I feel so stressed out and I don't know how to handle it. I'm bad at handling stress I guess, I'm just not that strong. My job pays very little but I need it, I can't quit. If I quit then I go back to being broke and being a financial leech on my mom, and that stresses her out and I can't put her through that, so I have to be miserable and endure this hell because there's no other option. I either make her miserable or make myself miserable and she doesn't deserve to be miserable, only I do.

First thing, what do you do for a living Nate? Secondly, why don't you like it (this might be explained by what kind of job you have, but I'm asking it anyway)? How do you try to handle your stress? I'm very bad at it myself, it's taken me many years of working at it to get it under control to where I don't just blow my lid for the smallest things.

There have been some suggestions of looking for more work/better paying jobs. If I recall correctly, you live in a relatively small town, so I realize that this might not be a viable option for you. Have you ever considered moving to another town in search for a job or trying to apply for a public sector job?

And then there is the big part of this paragraph. You say you deserve to be miserable. Why do you deserve to be miserable? No one deserves that. We all deserve the right to live happy and fulfilled lives, free of persecution for whatever reason. There is no reason anyone, ever, should feel they deserve to be miserable.

There's nothing I can do. I'm trapped. Unless it turns out I have a long lost uncle who died and left me his fortune or a really rich girl falls for me and wants to marry me and is okay with me not having a job, I can't do anything except keep ****** barely above minimum wage jobs that aren't enough for me to get a place of my own thus forcing me to live with my mom the rest of my life.

At the risk of things getting political, multi-generational households are something this country (the United States) is going to be going back to due to certain economic climates. We're trained from a young age to believe there is this progression that you have to go through, and that to be an adult, especially a proper one, you have to hit all these marks by certain times, and that if you don't hit them then you're a complete failure. Well with the way things have been going in the USA for the last 15 to 20 years, those "marks" are becoming less and less certain and more like suggestions or being erased all together. I get it, living at home doesn't feel good, and you can't afford to move out. You are literally trapped living at home, it's a symptom not unlike what many Americans across the nation have to face, but I do encourage you to keep looking for options. You may find something out there that will pay you better that you do enjoy doing that will allow you to move out.

I don't know how to deal with it. I feel like I'm going crazy, I feel like I can't take it, I feel like I'm being destroyed from the inside and I can't stop it, I can't, there's nothing I can do, I'm powerless and weak and just...nothing. I am nothing. I have no legacy, and no importance. My family would mourn my death, and a couple of people on the internet would be sad if they found out (though it's doubtful they would ever find out, they'd just go "I wonder what happened to that Nate guy I haven't seen him in a long time" since there'd be no real way for them to know), but outside of that, I have no value. That just depresses me even more. I know that being considered important after you're dead doesn't really matter (because you're dead and you can't really care) but what I mean is that it just reinforces that I suck. I'm not even good enough to mean anything except to a small handful of people who really only love me because of carrying similar DNA rather than deserving it.

The best way to deal with these kinds of situations, typically, is to try to fight the root of the issue. Of course I don't know what's really causing all this for you, only you can know that. But you can take it, you can stop it, you're not powerless or weak. You were able to make a thread here seeking help, that was a step, now make another. As far as a legacy goes...I'm not sure I understand this. Most people pass through life in relative obscurity. They're known by their family, friends, and coworkers, but that's it. Very few people get to have a "legacy" so to speak, unless you're using this term in a different way, but from the surrounding sentences I believe I'm reading it right. But that raises the question of why is it important to have a legacy? Why does one need to be anything more than someone just got up everyday and did their best at living life? And that's where your value comes in, not in how many people remember you, but how people do remember you. If they remember you as a good person who stood up for what you believed in and tried hard at what you did, then your life has value to them and you've left a legacy for them to remember.

[Bobtheduck]

Let me just say, while this probably won't help your situation, Marriage doesn't solve everything... In fact, it could potentially create a lot MORE problems.

You're only two years older than me, and I feel the same way about a lot of things. I was a 28 year old [spoiler]virgin[/spoiler] who rushed into marriage because I thought I was getting too old and I was going to be separated from the (at the time I considered) wonderful girl I had met, and now I'm a 30 year old soon-to-be (most likely) divorcee who is living at home again and barely able to cope with school and life in general, with no significant accomplishments to my name, and a fear of losing touch with reality and a current (maybe soon-to-be ex) wife who harasses and insults me on a regular basis while throwing guilt at me for a position she really put herself into, but she blames it all on me and my family. I have two very old parents who are in the right time to die of old age, and I have a mounting debt, particularly since I had to use some of my loans for living expenses. If one of my parents die, I won't be able to live here anymore (especially if it's my dad) and I won't have the means to take care of myself through grad school. My wife has plans to give a false report in order to secure a divorce based on abuse (because that's the only way she could keep her conditional greencard) and I'm certain most of my friends and even family are tired of my complaining about the situation...

While our situations aren't the same, the feeling behind it is. All I can say is make sure you try to get yourself right with God (by that I mean have a repentant heart for sin in your life and be thankful for even the little good that you do have) and pray constantly. Also, be willing to do anything he tells you to do. Charity helps, trust me, as long as you do it in humility.

The verse I try to keep in mind is this:

Romans 8:28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

If you do your best to Love God (meaning you also have to love your neighbor and forgive those who have hurt you), everything in your life will work out for the better. You'll have issues until that point, and it will be painful, but the result will be better than you can imagine, as long as you stay submitted to Him. And, trust me, this advice is as much for me as it is for you. These are the things I pray for every day, in addition to the things more specific to my situation.

[goldenspines]

Unfortunately, since I'm almost fresh out of college, I'm still a greenhorn in regards to "dealing with the the real world", thus I doubt I can offer much beyond prayer to you, Nate.

I'd like to think that struggling to find purpose in one's life is a universal thing, but I have yet to prove it. So it might just be a few of us.
I'll admit even though I've never been in a dead-end job that I hated, but I have thought about the effects of my existence in the world (e.g. that they are non-existent) and have wondered seriously if anyone would care if I just disappeared.

I think it's something everyone has to question and answer for themselves (though God will help to an extent if we ask Him, I think. He does for me, at least). So, while it would be awesome, there's no set formula for "Here's how to have worth in life!"
Anyone who says otherwise is lying, or selling something. >_>

Praying that things will work out for you.



Also, Xeno has a better post with good advice. ^_^

[Nate]

are there any local clubs/groups around your area you could join?

Not that I'm aware of, my schedule doesn't allow for much of that anyway. Are you familiar with a 2-2-3 schedule? It's basically a rotating schedule of those numbers. So I work two days, off two days, work three days, off two days, work two days, off three days, repeat. They're 12 hour shifts. Though of course because I've become somewhat important in that I do a more unique job than other people (I made the ultimate mistake: being necessary at my job), I'm starting to have to work on my three day weekends.

could you start looking for one with a roommate?

Well I always have envied John Ritter, but I'm just not sure where I can find two sexy ladies to share an apartment with me. Anyway it's not that I mind living with my mom, and she doesn't mind me living here. So it's not like she wants me out, or I'm desperate to get out of the house. At least for the moment, things may change when her husband gets out of jail.

stick your resume all over the place and who knows?

All I'm really qualified for is more of the same, jobs that pay barely above minimum wage.

Remeber why you have that job in the first place.

Because money is practically necessary in society. I know why I have a job, that doesn't make it suck any less, it doesn't make me feel any less stressed out.

I don't understand what more you would be looking for for fulfillment.

I want to enjoy life. I have fun, I play games and watch TV shows that I like and I enjoy doing those things but they're basically specks of light in an otherwise dreary life. I don't know what it's like to wake up and look forward to the day ahead. I don't know what it's like to feel happy to be alive. At best I am grateful that I get to do something fun once in a while but I don't like myself and I don't like my life.

what do you do for a living Nate?

I work at a factory that produces transportation lighting parts, so like stuff for stoplights/crosswalks, sometimes vehicle lighting parts, that kind of stuff. Mostly it involves sitting next to a plastic processing machine, waiting for it to drop a part, looking at the part and seeing if it's acceptable or not, and either throwing it in a scrap bin or packing it in a box. However lately I haven't been at a machine, I've been finishing some parts by drilling/cutting them, which means I stand at a drill/saw for 12 hours and grab a part, cut/drill it, put it back, and grab another.

It's repetitive. It's boring. It's long. It forces me to be alone with my thoughts.

I don't like being alone with my thoughts.

Have you ever considered moving to another town in search for a job or trying to apply for a public sector job?

Moving costs money, which I don't have...I haven't really thought about applying for a public sector job but...I don't know.

Why do you deserve to be miserable?

I don't like myself. I can't think of anything I like about myself.

Marriage doesn't solve everything

Oh I'm well aware of that. I have no plans to get married anytime soon. I mean, not like I have a choice in the matter, getting married kind of requires a second person, and yeah the odds of me finding that are pretty much equivalent to winning the lottery while flipping a coin coming up heads 100 times in a row and then being struck by lightning.

Anyway I know your situation is rough, man. I hope things get better for you, I really do, your problems are way bigger than my complaints. @.@

I'd like to think that struggling to find purpose in one's life is a universal thing

I was kinda rambling when I posted this last night and I noticed Xeno mentioned it too. So I wanted to say, I'm not really searching for "a purpose" exactly. Though I know it sounds like that. I'm not worried if people will build statues of me or anything.

What it boils down to is, I don't like my job. I dread my job. Most people don't like their job but most people also don't feel like they're going to break down crying in the middle of work because it feels like their soul is being slowly eroded by the awfulness of it.

I mean not that the job itself is really bad particularly. I know it has to be just me, because everyone else I work with, while they don't like their job or anything, they seem to have accepted it, they seem to be okay with it at least, they don't seem like they're depressed and lost. Maybe they're like me and they smile and put it behind a mask and try to pretend like everything's okay while deep down inside going "Is this all I'll ever be, just some guy pulling hot plastic out of a machine?"

Again, that sounds like I'm looking for something more important. But it isn't. It's me going, I hate this job, but I don't know what else to do, am I just going to have to live in misery for the rest of my life because I can't do anything else? And it feels like the answer is yes.

And I hate it.

[MrKrillz0r]

Praying! I don't think any advice I might try to give would be of any help, but remember that God wants you to be filled with joy, and for Him nothing is impossible, so there surely must be a way out.

[sarahjoy78]

I'm praying for you! I pray that things get better!

[Mithrandir]

Other than praying for you, there's little advice I can give that hasn't already been said. But there is something I learned from my mother, while she was in agony every day, dying from cancer... She lived by the motto:

"Pain is inevitable, but misery is optional."

Is there any possibility of a promotion at your current job? If not, there are places like fast food joints where you can at least get promoted to shift manager and eventually work your way up, if you have the drive.

Maybe I'm totally reading this wrong, and if so I apologize, but it seems your biggest issue is one of motivation. Would something like this help?

http://zenhabits.net/get-off-your-butt-16-ways-to-get-motivated-when-youre-in-a-slump/

We'll keep you in our prayers, man!

[Psycho Molos]

I sincerely know how you feel and am surprised that there's another member roughly in my situation (though it seems in a much smaller location than me and apparently not disabled). I share a lot of the same frustrations: have some limited resources, have many obstacles in my way, though my situation is different. I do have more free time but it's a mixed blessing, and ever since my mom died a few years back leaving a handwritten will never updated since 85, my aunt and sis decided to follow part of it and so my aunt is my legal guardian. The only money I could "touch" is my paycheck and checking and savings and my benefits from my late dad is going into the guardianship...and I'm hiding from my aunt the fact I maxed out my Capital One that I've had since before mom died. So if I get a new job with my degree my benefits go poof (which I dunno how THAT would impact the guardianship but knowing my fam...) I dunno how I'd payoff the card. Heck I dunno how NOW other than come clean and "prepare to die." I also live in a HUD place that my fam thinks would be good for me since all the apartment tenants have to be on meds and don't know how a better paying job would affect that.

My ummm "legal sitch" also impacts other stuff like me living in a state I don't like at all since I've equated it most recently with my verbally abusive exstepdad. I can't move out of a state mostly populated by dumb, ignorant, abusive hicks which give the phrase "dumb Okie" a sad validity. Also unlike you, I really want marriage, a kid of my own and so 1) it's frustrating that I don't go out much, not much social places to meet people and it's just that everyone I met (not that I came out with 40 Qs) I eventually learn by listening that they're unavailable in some way or have more than one kid (prohibitive when one desires a bio kid) or...well u get it. 2) my aunt would probably nip in the bud any relationship that goes that far since legally I can't sign very many things without her and it sucks since a lot of "normal" ladies put me in "the friend zone" but those more seriously disabled than I am crush on me which I don't want since I'm so smart I wouldn't have anything to share or talk about and they wouldn't be able to do RPGs and wouldn't watch anime since its "for kids.". Sadly I assume my fam would be happier if I learn to be happier "in my place" and just be with someone more mentally disabled, 3) if I do get married, again, my benefits go poof.

And within all that, I'm wondering "Why me? Why'd God make me this way and what's wrong with me? I just want what most everyone else wants. I also want to correct God's 'mistake' by marrying and raising a kid to adult coz if God hadn't allowed dad to die, I wouldn't have had a screwed up sucky life in a POS state and being a magnet for idiots and morons (have a coworker that I swear is simple minded, OCD and has much less of a life than I do that roped me into playing online golf every week), etc etc".

Anyway sorry this was soooooooooooooooo long but just wanted you to know you're not the only one!! Oh btw, I'm the ONLY ONE in my fam really into anime and gaming. My nieces do some gaming with me but are easily distracted and my neph is now out of my sis's house. I think the only way to get nieces more into anime is to tap into their love of vampires, werewolves and stuff like that. Other than those two, my fam just thinks RPGs and anime are just "weird, Mother's basement, niche" things. Clearly not geeks. There was even times when I was under the impression mom and sis were "looking down their noses" at anime, RPGs, and Go.

Oops I just made this longer. I'll just stop lol

[Davidizer13]

Is there any possibility of a promotion at your current job? If not, there are places like fast food joints where you can at least get promoted to shift manager and eventually work your way up, if you have the drive.

Yeah, I was going to suggest something along these lines. Prove to the people in charge where you are that you're smart ('cause I know you are) and you've got the drive and ability to do something more than you are now. Sounds like with the machining stuff, they've at least seen something in you, I guess? That's how I take it, at least. Have you tried connecting with your co-workers? They might be all right if you're looking for something to do, I dunno what kind of people you work with, but...yeah.

Anyway, yeah, I think you'd be surprised at how much impact you've made on people; at the least, you've challenged me to look at myself, pick out where I've been needing to re-evaluate certain things. Not only that, but you've done more with your life than you'd probably think. I mean, you were in the military for a while, right? That's something I don't think I could handle, and yet you did.

Just keep at it - a few months ago, I was despairing to do anything with my life, applying to temp jobs to keep me going and getting hardly any responses, but then the kind of job I was looking for called me back after I had totally forgot about the place and said to come up for an interview. Anything can happen in a few months, just keep your options open, start targeting an industry you want to get into, something bigger than what you're doing now, and keep at it, and you might be pleasantly surprised!

[AdriTan]

Sorry if I was condescending I was actually giving my dads advice that was to himself didn't mean to make it seem like I knew what I was talking bout (cuz we all know I dont personally). should've mentioned my dad..... Sorry. But anyway I'm praying

[Bobtheduck]

Anyway I know your situation is rough, man. I hope things get better for you, I really do, your problems are way bigger than my complaints. @.@

That wasn't my intent when I posted. I really wanted to say that while our situations are drastically different, the feeling being our current state (feeling worthless and hopeless) is the same. And I was trying to offer you the same advice I'm offering myself. I haven't come close to mastering the things I suggested, but I'm really trying.

Feelings of worthlessness and hopelessness... Well, let's just say, they're not from God.

As for going places by working fast food, I have a friend who became the youngest McDonald's manager in Denmark (possibly in Europe, I don't really know) and that actually launched a political career. He became the Mayor of his city, and... I'm not sure, but I THINK he may be in Parliament or something now (it's kind of hard to tell EXACTLY what's going on, since I can't read Danish, and Google translate doesn't always do a good job), so Mith is dead accurate about what advancement through fast food can do for you.

EDIT, so I checked, and from what I can gather, he was part of a "Mayor Council" which is a governmental office consisting of 12 city mayors throughout Denmark... Ok, I have no clue. Anyhow, he's got a political career that started with him becoming McDonald's manager. So, yeah, McDonald's could end up doing more for your future than a plastics factory.

[SilverToast]

Praying. I hope things get better for you Nate.
Sorry if my post was understood as being condescending.

[QtheQreater]

"Pain is inevitable, but misery is optional."

^this

Nate, since you were one of the first people that made me realize that I didn't totally suck, I am not convinced of your so-called suckiness.

However, jobs that suck the life out of you do suck, by definition. I'll be praying for an open door.

[Yuki-Anne]

I'm just gonna pop in and tell you that you're a cooler breed of cat than you realize, and I'm praying for you. I don't want to pretend that I understand anything or I have any answers, but maybe if you got plugged in to some kind of volunteering activity it could improve your self-esteem. There's nothing more depressing to me than feeling like I'm not helping anybody.

[Wolfsong]

you sound like my dad. He says the same thing (minus marrying a rich girl of course).
I can't offer anything, except my prayers. God bless you. God bless you.

[Sheenar]

I'm just gonna pop in and tell you that you're a cooler breed of cat than you realize, and I'm praying for you. I don't want to pretend that I understand anything or I have any answers, but maybe if you got plugged in to some kind of volunteering activity it could improve your self-esteem. There's nothing more depressing to me than feeling like I'm not helping anybody.

I know this is a month old (I've been inactive for a while), but I just wanted to echo what Yuki said.

I agree that volunteer work can definitely boost your self-esteem. I know that it definitely has helped me feel like I can still contribute to society and feel useful --even when I have been so long without work due to being sick. And it doesn't have to be a huge time commitment. Collect canned goods for a local food pantry. Clean out your closet and donate to a local Goodwill or homeless shelter. Ask local ministries what they need/what you can do to help in your spare time. Just a suggestion that has helped me.

Anyway, will be praying for you, Nate.

[thisiskris89]

Dude I know how you feel.My life has been feelin pretty meaningless.
I have no job,almost had a relationship(blew up in my face).
I am home everday doing nuthin. My poor dad is the only one working(2 jobs).
I want to pay my own student loans and buy stuff I need and help out my folks.
So yeah,i kinda get it.Yeah,I feel yah bro.*gives him a high five*

[akorecki1]

I may be 15 but I know what it's like. I was so stressed out it almost lead me to suicide. I thought about it I still have 2 cuts on my neck to prove it that was in 7th grade. There is more in life trust me. i still cut sometimes when I feel like i am worthless. God made you for a reason just keep trying. I have gone 1 week without cutting because it isn't my time to go no matter how many people i have lost(12). At least i have something to look forward to. I was here to make a difference as much as I can we are all ambassadors of Christ and he loves us don't worry he hears us.

[Cleanedbyblood]

In this day and age it is really easy to become stressed out. Trust me. I'm 30 years old with pre-hypertension that could turn into full blown hypertension at any time. I just started a job doing something I dislike a lot, but as it stands right now, its a job (I'm a cashier when I applied to the company I put in to work on the floor). I am currently helping my parents take care of my sister's 6 girls since they were taken away from her by the state. My sister has turned her back on the girls by choosing her boyfriend over them (I am in the process of trying to convince my oldest niece and folks to forgive her). My boyfriend is currently on the other side of the country.
I used to be suicidal in middle and high school. I couldn't think of a reason for me to even be around. Even while dating another guy, I tried to kill myself once when we had an argument. Eventually I gave up on the suicide idea and became a wiccan (not really proud to admit that)
At my last job, one of my co-workers (who is my current boyfriend) started talking to me a bit at a time about God and Jesus. He told me that God has a plan for everyone. We may not see it at all but there is one, even if it seems so pointless or whatever, God wants us to do something.
My suggestion to you is to pray hard. My pastor uses the acronym P.U.S.H. (Pray Until Something Happens) Keep on praying and we will pray for you as well

God bless you!

[Sammy Boy]

Hey Nate, you don't suck. Even if you didn't have a job, you still don't suck. Your value as a person is independent of your financial situation or social connections.

It sounds like your job is stressful. I can't exactly relate (my job is stressful too, but I don't hate it), but I think I understand a little of what if feels like when you don't want to go to work but can't afford to quit.

I think many of the problems we encounter in life do not have solutions, even when we ask God. But I believe God gives us the strength to endure and live through those problems day by day.

I pray God gives you the strength to cope with your situation, because I believe in learning to deal with problems in life our character as people are built up.

Having said that, I do pray that your job situation will also change for the better. I feel your pain.

[Nate]

My suggestion to you is to pray hard. My pastor uses the acronym P.U.S.H. (Pray Until Something Happens) Keep on praying and we will pray for you as well

I have a feeling God is probably getting a bit annoyed with my constant prayer about this subject, especially since it's always the same thing. "I hate this. I can't stand this." I'm pretty sure God knows how I feel about it by now, why continue to bother him with saying the same crap over and over? It's pretty obviously not going to change, there's no point in trying. I might as well be praying to win the Powerball or for Equestria to be real at this point. I mean hey, those two things have the exact same odds of happening as my situation getting better (that is to say zero).

[Cleanedbyblood]

I have a feeling God is probably getting a bit annoyed with my constant prayer about this subject, especially since it's always the same thing. "I hate this. I can't stand this." I'm pretty sure God knows how I feel about it by now, why continue to bother him with saying the same crap over and over? It's pretty obviously not going to change, there's no point in trying. I might as well be praying to win the Powerball or for Equestria to be real at this point. I mean hey, those two things have the exact same odds of happening as my situation getting better (that is to say zero).

I don't think God gets annoyed with our prayers. He wants us to pray to Him. He made us so we cannot get through life without Him. If He did, we probably wouldn't be here or our prayers will be answered right away

[AdriTan]

Isn't there a verse in the bible about God being prayed to a bunch and then He finally just says "OK and does something? Goldy? Maybe you coul help me out?

[seaglass27]

I have a feeling God is probably getting a bit annoyed with my constant prayer about this subject, especially since it's always the same thing. "I hate this. I can't stand this." I'm pretty sure God knows how I feel about it by now, why continue to bother him with saying the same crap over and over? It's pretty obviously not going to change, there's no point in trying. I might as well be praying to win the Powerball or for Equestria to be real at this point. I mean hey, those two things have the exact same odds of happening as my situation getting better (that is to say zero).

Well, that could be, actually. We are called to have joy in everything. Nate, the only purpose I ever feel in life is when I following Christ. Look at your situation and try to see how God may have placed you in it to serve him.

I realize I'm young and it's probably arrogant of me to post this, but that is the best advice I have. I'm sorry. Praying.