Please pray for me

[Makachop^^128]

This seems to be the only section I post in anymore sorry guys if I post too many prayer requests. I feel really selfish asking for so much prayer.

I've always had emotional problems, I've never really been happy, but this year is most likely the worst year. The doctors are basically saying my parents are going to die in the next few years, lost all of my friends other then my boyfriend, and not welcomed at school anymore because of bullys and rumors going around so I'm homeschooled now. My parents have been taking their stress out on me and there are been many deaths this year in the family, and I found out somethign really bad and personal about my past. Also I've been praying and praying and reading my bible but I feel like Gods not there at all. I feel really alone, I only feel like I have my boyfriend who I hardly get to see. I'm kinda having a break down I don't know who to turn to, I used to cut, and I've been having urges to start again, but I really don't want to start that again. Please pray that life will calm down a bit for me, and I'll get closer to God and I wont start cutting again.

edit: I forgot to mention, I think I might be bipolar but my parents don't believe me so I can't so anything about it, all I know is almost every night I don't sleep till 4 or so, and some nights its cause I'm extremely suicidal, or depressed, and other nights its because I'm really hyper and doing a ton of art and that sort of thing and my mind is racing. I'm not sure what is labeled as bipolar, if anyone could tell me I'd like that.

[Mr. Hat'n'Clogs]

Will be praying. Don't feel bad about asking for prayer, it sounds like life is pretty awful for you right now, so it's not like you're overdoing it or anything.

I wish I could offer something other than prayer but I can't think of any advice to give.

[Makachop^^128]

Will be praying. Don't feel bad about asking for prayer, it sounds like life is pretty awful for you right now, so it's not like you're overdoing it or anything.

I wish I could offer something other than prayer but I can't think of any advice to give.

Thanks >.<

no its ok, thanks for praying I really need it.

[TopazRaven]

This seems to be the only section I post in anymore sorry guys if I post too many prayer requests. I feel really selfish asking for so much prayer.

Now you sound like me. Don't worry, I complain more then you any day. For the record, I don't think you are complaining or selfish though. I'll always be glad to pray for you. Asking for prayer when you are going through a tough time in life is NEVER selfish. So don't worry about that in the least.

I've always had emotional problems, I've never really been happy, but this year is most likely the worst year. The doctors are basically saying my parents are going to die in the next few years, lost all of my friends other then my boyfriend, and not welcomed at school anymore because of bullys and rumors going around so I'm homeschooled now. My parents have been taking their stress out on me and there are been many deaths this year in the family, and I found out somethign really bad and personal about my past. Also I've been praying and praying and reading my bible but I feel like Gods not there at all. I feel really alone, I only feel like I have my boyfriend who I hardly get to see. I'm kinda having a break down I don't know who to turn to, I used to cut, and I've been having urges to start again, but I really don't want to start that again. Please pray that life will calm down a bit for me, and I'll get closer to God and I wont start cutting again.

edit: I forgot to mention, I think I might be bipolar but my parents don't believe me so I can't so anything about it, all I know is almost every night I don't sleep till 4 or so, and some nights its cause I'm extremely suicidal, or depressed, and other nights its because I'm really hyper and doing a ton of art and that sort of thing and my mind is racing. I'm not sure what is labeled as bipolar, if anyone could tell me I'd like that.

I really wish there was a way for me to magically reach through the computer screen and hug you right now. Reading this was a nice kick in the behind and reminder to me to shut the heck up about my petty problems. I'll definitly be praying for you and I wish there was more I could do or say to help you out!

Meanwhile, I'm not sure if this will be helpfur or not, but here is http://www.dictionary.com's definition for bi-polar.

An affective disorder characterized by periods of mania alternating with periods of depression, usually interspersed with relatively long intervals of normal mood.

[Makachop^^128]

Thank you for praying >.<
the link isn't working but from that quote sounds like what I though bipolar was...I don't know that I'd like to go on meds but I need to do somethign :/

[bkilbour]

I will be praying. If there's anything I can do to help (whatever that may be), PM me, okay?

[Atria35]

Definitely still praying for you. You're an awesome gal, Makachop! And I'm hoping things look up for you.

[alecho]

Hello there, my name is alecho. I know we've never met before but I want you to know I'll always keep you in my prayers. You are going through so much and I wish I can do more. If there is, please don't hesitate to ask. Til then I will be praying for you. God bless.

[Makachop^^128]

Thank you guys ^.^ I really appreciate it :3

I forgot to mention, I have a huge guilt problem when I do anything, I paint a picture or play my piano or so anything I like and I have this deep guilt and a voice inside me saying "whats the use of doing anything, you can't make a difference its all for nothing." and Its really depressing. Its kinda a new thing going on only about a year, but I really have to push myself to do anything :/

[TheMewster]

Prayed for you makachop! Oh and I'm worried about that voice, Satan loves to say stuff like that. But your request of prayer and description of your problems sure tells ME to stop worrying about my problems! And if there was a way to reach out from the computer (or in my case phone) screen and hug you I would beat TopazRaven to it, believe me. God bless you!

[Makachop^^128]

Prayed for you makachop! Oh and I'm worried about that voice, Satan loves to say stuff like that. But your request of prayer and description of your problems sure tells ME to stop worrying about my problems! And if there was a way to reach out from the computer (or in my case phone) screen and hug you I would beat TopazRaven to it, believe me. God bless you!

Wow I didn't even think about that...in fact I thought it was the opposite v.v but that makes a lot of sense. I don't know why God would want me to feel guilty doing the things I love, I can't paint a picture or write a short story, or anything I thought I could use in the future without feeling useless. Thank you for the prayer and telling me that >.<

[Sapphire225]

Will definately be praying. Sounds really tough on your end. I really wanna give you a big hug.

[Nami]

I'm praying for you dear. *hugs* Times like these is when you need prayer, friends and most importantly God, the most. I'm so sorry this is happening.

[Makachop^^128]

Thanks you guys for praying >.<

[TopazRaven]

http://www.dictionary.com

Sorry, that link should work if you want to poke around that site. Anyway, I'll still be praying for you!

[Makachop^^128]

Thanks from looking around I might be bi polar. I just don't know what to do next.
Thank you all for your pray >.< Things haven't really changed yet but I'm keeping hope >.<

[steenajack]

I'll be praying for you Maka. I can honestly say that I kinda can relate to you on some sort of level. *hugs* I know what it feels like when your in pain, and no matter how hard you pray it feels like you're crying out to a brick wall.....He is there even if it feels like He isn't. He's carrying you through this,even if it feels like He isn't. I will be praying for you, really I will.

[Makachop^^128]

This is kinda off topic but....well my boyfriend, he's not a christian, and I know the bible is against that...anyway recently we decided to start a bible study, he wants to learn more about Christianity and I need to be reading the bible more so we thought it'd be a good idea. I'd just like prayer that it will work out, and that maybe he will except God through it all. I know a lot of you will be kinda surprised reading a christian dating a non christian v.v lately we've had problems because of it, not arguments we've never had a argument or anything, but more things with family and well I've been thinking lately how it will be when he dies....and it hurts a ton, I know I shouldn't be thinking about it most likely, but its stuck in my mind, anyway please pray for him.

Also if you have any suggestions on what book to study with him please tell me.

[Atria35]

Honestly, it doesn't surprise me, but that's because there are a decent amount of inter-faith marriages in my family. And they've all worked out pretty well.

I don't have any suggestions, I wish I did, but I'm wishing you luck!

[Makachop^^128]

Oks >< I get put down alot by my family for liking him so idk :/ maybe they are different.
thank you ^.^

[Atria35]

Families can be like that. He's showing an interest, and if they aren't satisfied by that, then that's their problem. God might work through you to bring him to the faith, He might not. But if you want to be with him and feel that God feels it's okay to be with him... Smile and nod. Just look at them and smile and nod.

[Makachop^^128]

Thank you ^.^ its kinda nice not getting put down about it I really do love him if he's a christian or not, I did pray about it all before we went out and I felt like I did the right thing. I think God can use anything so I'm just praying for his will.