Jealousy/Self esteem

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Postby aliveinHim » Wed Mar 23, 2011 7:22 am

Girl, I feel your pain. It has taken me my whole life to get over my insecurity. For years I thought I was the ugliest, most wretched creature on the face of the planet. I thought because I've never had a guy ask me out or want to flirt with me, I was ugly. I felt worthless and I hated the way I looked. I don't really fit in with most girls my age. I have my own joke with myself that the only boys who want to walk around and hold hands with me are little preschoolers (and they're really cute too).

Last September, I was at an aquaintance's (who I had been really jealous of) sweet 16. She doesn't have a gorgeous face but she's got the best body ever. She's short and petite and she wears really tight clothes all the time. She and most of her friends were wearing skimpyish clothes and I was wearing a fairly loose t-shirt and a long skirt. I felt really bad about myself and really out of place. I burned with envy for her and her friends who all had cute bodies. When I got home that night, I threw myself on my bed and cried really hard. In order to soothe my crying, I read Proverbs 31. I was able to see what the beautiful woman is like. She's a servant, a worker, and a homemaker. Because of her godly character, her husband and children call her blessed. I read Isaiah 53 about the prophesy of Jesus. It says that He had no comliness but what He was about to do was give us the greatest gift ever. I cried even harder and even cried myself to sleep.

You don't have to worry about those other mean girls. You've got a boyfriend who loves you for who you are. The hard part about being drop dead gorgeous is that you wonder if a guy loves you or your body (but I'm sure you're really pretty). You're not the only one who shares these feelings. I know plenty of people who feel your pain. I'll pray for you, sis.

Hugs <3
"And you He made alive, who were dead in trespasses and sins, in which you once walked according to the course of this world, according to the prince of the power of the air, the spirit who now works in the sons of disobedience, among whom also we all once conducted ourselves in the lusts of our flesh, fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, just as the others.
But God, who is rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in trespasses, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved), and raised us up together, and made us sit together in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, that in the ages to come He might show the exceeding riches of His grace in His kindness toward us in Christ Jesus." Ephesians 2:1-7

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Postby TopazRaven » Wed Mar 23, 2011 10:00 am

Aw Maka! That really is terrible, I'll definitly be praying for you. I was bullied in school as well, but never to that extent. 0.o I hope things get better soon, high school kids can be so stupid.
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Postby Makachop^^128 » Wed Mar 23, 2011 10:41 pm

Thanks guys >.< a guy that stood up for me now is getting a ton of threats from her :/ its scary but I honestly don't think she'll do it, even though shes beaten up peopel before and stuff :/
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Postby Maledicte » Thu Mar 24, 2011 12:49 am

*hugs* You're doing good, Maka. You've got your friends here, you've got your boyfriend and that guy who stood up for you. Still praying for you.

Have you talked to your parents or any authority figures about this?
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Postby Nami » Thu Mar 24, 2011 7:45 am

Yeah, what Maledicte said, have you spoken to your parents?

Still praying for you Maka! *hugs*
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Postby aliveinHim » Thu Mar 24, 2011 11:04 am

Huggies!!!!!!!!!!!!
"And you He made alive, who were dead in trespasses and sins, in which you once walked according to the course of this world, according to the prince of the power of the air, the spirit who now works in the sons of disobedience, among whom also we all once conducted ourselves in the lusts of our flesh, fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, just as the others.
But God, who is rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in trespasses, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved), and raised us up together, and made us sit together in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, that in the ages to come He might show the exceeding riches of His grace in His kindness toward us in Christ Jesus." Ephesians 2:1-7

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Postby Makachop^^128 » Thu Mar 24, 2011 11:24 am

I told her if she threatens to hurt anyone else I'm going to tell someone.
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Postby Nami » Fri Mar 25, 2011 9:18 am

WOOHO! GO MAKA! *hugs*
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Postby ABlipinTime » Sun Mar 27, 2011 1:24 pm

have you found out why she's making these threats? what's the deal? or did i miss something posted earlier?
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Postby Makachop^^128 » Mon Mar 28, 2011 2:41 am

ABlipinTime (post: 1467810) wrote:have you found out why she's making these threats? what's the deal? or did i miss something posted earlier?


I don't know :/ She told me recently shes jealous of me...and well in the past She had a crush on me >.< we used to be friends, it was really awkward, someone told me recently she still likes me. I'm really not sure, maybe she feels because I don't want to be her friend she has to make threats? I'm not sure >.<
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Postby TopazRaven » Mon Mar 28, 2011 7:48 am

She has a crush on you? That's gotta be awkward. 0.o
For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

NIV, Romans 8:38-39.
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Postby Nami » Mon Mar 28, 2011 8:40 am

thats... weird O_O; oh my. Well, its not a wonder then.
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Postby Atria35 » Mon Mar 28, 2011 9:30 am

It's wierd and unusual for anyone of any sexual persuation to behave like that. It's.... juvenile. Reminds me of the guys that liked me in kindergarten/elementary school - they'd push me around and annoy me. Their mothers were nice enough to clue me in, since apparently they'd come home and talk about how great I was, but yeah. That's how kids behave.
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Postby Makachop^^128 » Mon Mar 28, 2011 11:55 am

Yea its really odd and awkward but its been going on sense 8th grade so I kinda it used to it. She used to be really....idk how to say it like flirty but in a physical way :/ now shes just mean.
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Postby Wind » Mon Mar 28, 2011 12:03 pm

Makachop^^128 (post: 1456565) wrote:Hoihoi

I've always been Jealous, when i was little I was about talents (not very talented)
Now its looks, and Personality. every morning I wake up and instantly think about how ugly I am...It almost seems like a spiritual attack cause it just comes...not brought up by anything and I just break down crying.
I'm getting really sick of it. It gets in the way, I just want to be happy how God made me, even if I'm not pretty, I should have confidence in God. I have the sweetest guy, he try's really really hard to make me feel beautiful, but after we hang out I still go home and cry because I feel so ugly. I feel like a jerk, he does so much and I still feel so bad.

Also I have a few girls I'm extremely jealous of, I hate jealousy I just want to get ride of it. Makes me sick. Both of the girls, the guy I like used to like, they flirt with him make him blush and make him all awkward. and are really um just its not good >.> they both, I believe a lot prettier then me, they also can flirt and I can't, they tease me for it too so it doesn't help v.v I just am praying I can get over it, and be confident. I know how it feels to have people jealous over you. I lost a friend that way. I don't want to put that pressure on someone else. So please pray I'll put more trust in God that he made me the way I'm supposed to be and that my jealousy will go away, I know its a sin and I really want to get over it.


I too struggle with this very thing it doesn't really go away ever God just gives you the tools and methods to deal with it I would suggest praying for the wisdom and discernment to deal with the problem rather than asking for the problem to go away
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Postby Maledicte » Mon Mar 28, 2011 2:20 pm

Oh wow. Awkward does not begin to describe.

Maybe you two need a one-on-one talk, with an adult or other neutral third party to mediate.
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Postby K. Ayato » Mon Mar 28, 2011 2:23 pm

I agree. It might be best to get an idea where she's coming from. Praying!
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